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Original poster

14m old... everything is generally crap!

6 replies

smile4me · 15/12/2013 15:29

Getting to end of my tether with DD, finding the idea of leaving her at the Salvation Army with 'free to a good home' around her neck rather appealing Smile

She was a pretty good sleeper up to about 10 months - got herself to sleep by sucking her thumb since about 4 months, woke in the night maybe once a week on average? But the last 4 months have just totally turned to shit and I'm so tired I don't actually know how I can cope at work tomorrow. Current routine - she wakes up around 5-5.30 (which is an issue in itself!), DH brings her into bed with us and we try and get a bit more sleep until 6ish. Works about 50% of the time. Put her down for 1st nap at around 8:30-9 and she generally sleeps for about 40 mins, although sometimes up to 1hr 15. I put her down for an afternoon nap at about 1.30, generally sleeps until 3pm, then in bed by 7:15 and takes 30-45 mins to get her to sleep.

First problem - we've gone from occasional night wakings to now waking 3-4 times each night, absolutely howling like the world is ending each time. normally the first couple of times she settles quickly, but we usually have a 15-20 min screaming session at around 2.30am. We go to her immediately and white noise and reassurance from us seems to be what she needs. She doesn't seem to be too cold/hot, hungry or thirsty, calpol does nothing. I really struggle to get back to sleep after this wake up (pregnancy insomnia doesn't help) so sometimes getting only 4 hours broken sleep, not ideal for high responsibility healthcare job Confused

Second problem - DD has settled herself to sleep at night since 5 months, essentially since she stopped being able to BF to sleep (just didn't work for her anymore!). Naps were different, had to be put down asleep after a cuddle. Very suddenly about a month ago (just as I started putting her down for naps awake) she totally lost the ability to go to sleep without me sitting next to her and holding her hand. Takes up to an hour some nights, which not only means she is getting less night sleep, but my precious alone time with DH (or for me!) is now non existent Sad What's happened and how do I get her out of this habit?

Third problem - since DD could sit herself up I've never been able to get her to stay lying in the cot unaided. I use a sleep sac thing that is attached to the sheet out of desperation as even after 2 hours of lying her back down every time she sits/stands, she still persists and just runs around the cot laughing. Without it the only way I can get her to sleep is to physically pin her down with an arm/hand on her side. But I do wonder if it's contributing to her waking and crying in frustration at night? But then without it we'll be up lying her back down in the cot! Anyone else had any success with particularly persistent toddlers?

Sorry for long post! Any suggestions would be much appreciated as I'm quietly contemplating jumping on a plane to another country and not coming back!

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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Rockchick1984 · 16/12/2013 15:08

Not a huge amount of advice that I can offer, but my DS and most of my friend's children needed to drop down to 1 daytime nap around 12 months, as any more than that would disrupt nighttime sleep. For me, DS went from 2 naps totalling around 3 hours, to 1 lunchtime nap of 1.5-2 hours, and it made a huge difference to how well he slept overnight!

zoobaby · 16/12/2013 21:55

No advice as I don't think I've cracked this sleeping malarkey. But can tell you what we do. DS is 15mo and he's transitioning to one nap only. Some days he can't make it and has a sneaky snooze for 20 min while BFing at about 9:30ish. I never let him sleep properly at this time though. A quick catnap does wonders for his temperament and doesn't put him off his proper 2 hour sleep at 12:30. I'm super strict at waking him by 2:30 at the latest. He goes to bed about 8pm-ish. Sometimes he wakes at 6:00 onwards but mostly goes until closer to 7:00.

DS also became very clingy last month. I put it down to going back to work, but maybe it's an age thing? Also, does your LO have molars coming through? You can see them underneath DS' top and bottom gums. That can't be fun.

zoobaby · 16/12/2013 21:56

No advice as I don't think I've cracked this sleeping malarkey. But can tell you what we do. DS is 15mo and he's transitioning to one nap only. Some days he can't make it and has a sneaky snooze for 20 min while BFing at about 9:30ish. I never let him sleep properly at this time though. A quick catnap does wonders for his temperament and doesn't put him off his proper 2 hour sleep at 12:30. I'm super strict at waking him by 2:30 at the latest. He goes to bed about 8pm-ish. Sometimes he wakes at 6:00 onwards but mostly goes until closer to 7:00.

DS also became very clingy last month. I put it down to going back to work, but maybe it's an age thing? Also, does your LO have molars coming through? You can see them underneath DS' top and bottom gums. That can't be fun.

zoobaby · 16/12/2013 21:56

No advice as I don't think I've cracked this sleeping malarkey. But can tell you what we do. DS is 15mo and he's transitioning to one nap only. Some days he can't make it and has a sneaky snooze for 20 min while BFing at about 9:30ish. I never let him sleep properly at this time though. A quick catnap does wonders for his temperament and doesn't put him off his proper 2 hour sleep at 12:30. I'm super strict at waking him by 2:30 at the latest. He goes to bed about 8pm-ish. Sometimes he wakes at 6:00 onwards but mostly goes until closer to 7:00.

DS also became very clingy last month. I put it down to going back to work, but maybe it's an age thing? Also, does your LO have molars coming through? You can see them underneath DS' top and bottom gums. That can't be fun.

zoobaby · 16/12/2013 21:57

Argh. Sorry for triplicate post just now. Bloody phone back button!

Original poster
smile4me · 21/12/2013 08:42

Thanks Rockchick and Zoobaby Smile I had been wondering about dropping down to 1 sleep, but she is soooo tired by morning nap time! Days we are out and about she often only has 2 sleeps of about 1/2 hour each and doesn't make any difference to night time either Sad but that'll probably be the next thing I try. Last night was even worse than usual, slept 7.30-8, awake and crying on and off until 8.45, woke at 9:30 then cried on and off (with me in the room holding her hand) until 10.30. Slept until 1.15 then brought her into bed with us out of desperation for sleep, she thrashed about for half hour then slept until 3, then slept on and off until 5! I'm so tired I spend most of the morning in tears (I guess the hormones don't help either) Sad

molars are all through (just) Zoobaby, I had been hoping that was it, even though the calpol doesn't help at all, but still no easier!

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