Help please - 7mo getting worse at sleeping

[LightminTheQueem]

DD2 is 7 months. She had a point about a month ago when she slept through, 10pm-6am for several nights. Since then she's had a cold, and we moved her into another room on Sat (I've been in with her until last night) and she's back to waking at least twice but often more like 3+ times, often close together.

I feed her to sleep after bath and in the night. She used to self settle in the cot but doesn't any more really.

Naps she falls asleep in the pushchair or I feed her to sleep. I had got her into a good shush pat thing where she'd fall asleep in the cot but now she just screams if I try it.

Last night she was up for two hours as well as waking several times before that.

This week DH has been ill so I've been doing everything by myself and I'm exhausted and fed up with it all. She went to bed tonight at 7.30 and woke at 10.30 and 12.30 and just wants boob, drank a bit if formula but won't be comforted any other way.

I've got the no cry sleep solution but I can't really understand it. I don't want to do controlled crying. What can I do?

She's waking up in the night as all babies - in fact, all people - do. But she can't get herself back to sleep without feeding (sleep association, in the lingo).

Gradually reduce the feeds (if you are BF try to make them shorter, then drop one, then the other) - this literally means detaching her at intervals, if she screams put her back on, if she settles, great, the next night, aim or shorter - over time she will settle after less and less milk. then stop offering all together. I didn't want to do CIO either so this took me a good 6 weeks or more.

Other sleep 'hygiene': Encourage self settling during the day, when it's easier (put her own drowsy but awake, no feeding to sleep in the day from the off), keep everything consistent for naps and nightime sleep if you can (where she sleeps, in particular), nice bedtime routine that ideally does NOT end with a feed but something else, it might take a while to get there, avoid at all costs moving her after she's fallen asleep. The idea is that when she naturally rouses, she recognises a safe, secure environment and drifts off again.

I really recommend the info in solve your child's sleep problems by the dreaded Dr Ferber. I didn't use the method, never even considered it, but the information on how sleep works was a godsend and stopped me feeling I was going utterly mad. Good luck, it's awful, I know.

Thank you. We tried to settle her in the cot this morning and there was half an hour of screaming, but I think she's teething because as soon as she could bite on my finger she dropped off. We'll keep on with that (although sometimes she needs to sleep in the pushchair for school run) and once it's more established I'll try a different bed time routine, maybe feed after bath and then story with her sister and then bed.

I am trying to feed her less at night, I put her down as soon as she's asleep, but it's hard, part of me wants to make sure she has lots of milk to keep her asleep - hangover from having a newborn!

Thanks again, I really felt so angry last night and it's horrible to feel like that about your baby. It doesn't help that DH refers to us both as 'sleep deprived' when he's been in the spare room with earplugs since she was born!

Urgh I nearly murdered DH after three months of me getting up to BF every three hours and him sleeping. It is torture, and if you have two or more DC I can only imagine how tired you are.

One of the things I got from the Ferber book - confirming what I knew but wasn't confident enough to act on - was that the night milk was a habit,not hunger. (She was maybe 9 months at this point). She just couldn't get to sleep without using the bottle to relax. By gradually cutting the amount I do think I was kinder than going cold turkey.... When we got to the point of just offering water she cried, but we held her. I honestly believe she too was suffering the disrupted sleep. Not to mention my marriage and my sanity.

Good luck! Hide DH's earplugs for a start