Two month old won't sleep in cot OR co-sleep!

[TristanFarnon]

Didn't realise there was a dedicated sleep topic, so reposting for more advice!

I have an adorable nine week old baby, who is just the light of my life. All day he is wonderful company and my lovely, funny little bug. He plays and smiles and is a joy to be with.

Night times are a struggle though. From day one he has refused to go in his cot for any length of time. If we get him at exactly the right moment, we can get him down for half an hour to an hour but when he wakes up he gets very upset very quickly. Most of the time he wakes as we put him down and cries til we pick him up. If we put him down anything less than deep asleep he will cry to be picked up. I dont pick him up for every tiny whimper, but I do think he is just too young to be left to cry.

During the day he will occasionally nap in his pram for a while, but usually sleeps on me. Anything for an easy life! I use slings a lot and he is generally a very happy little guy.

I have tried safe co-sleeping (just him and me in the bed, thin sheet, no pillows etc) and it doesnt work for either of us. He is half awake and grizzles and thrashes all night, so I don't sleep at all. Sometimes he will just refuse point blank to lie down in the bed and cries and complains til we get up.

Since he was born, DH and I have been getting by sleeping in shifts, while he sleeps on our chests or laps. This has meant both adults get the bare minimum of sleep, but it is really not a long term solution. We keep trying the co sleeping and placing him in his cot, but I really feel we are making no progress with either. I am really frustrated and just want to find a method that suits all three of us.

He is EBF, and is taking infant gavisgon to help with reflux. Before the gavisgon he threw up an awful lot and fed every hour to two hours. This seems to be working, and he is now occasionally going three to four hours between feeds overnight.

Anybody have any advice for us? Or even just reassurance that this too shall pass and I haven't broken my baby!

You sound like us 4 months ago! I have become an evangelist for Poco Baby hammock. Might not work for you but was a game changer for us. DS has reflux and on Omeprazole etc. would not sleep lying flat and gurgled and thrashed about until he cried. We bought the hammock in desperation and the first time we put him in it he went straight to sleep and I got to lie in my bed without him! Might be worth a try.

Just to add as well that we have just taken DS off his medication, Omeprazole/domperidone as weaning him early on consultant advice has made a huge difference. Has outgrown hi hammock and we have been forced to transition to cot which is causing some sleep regression but much better than it was in the early days still. There is light at the end if the tunnel!

Things do get better! Your post sounds just like us a few months ago. Things are not perfect now, but they did improve a lot after 3 months, and after a bit of a blip at 4 months they are on the up again at 6 months.

Our biggest salvation was the sling - keeping DS in it as much as possible during the day minimised his reflux at night. On the recommendation of our doctor, on bad nights I would get him to sleep in the sling, make sure his face and head was clear of fabric etc and then sleep propped up on pillows or on the sofa. It's not ideal but better than nothing!

DS is also on omeprazole and ranitidine, they were not game changers but helped a bit. Other than that, our best things have been about making sure that he and I get out during the day to get some fresh air and meet other mums, and to tire him out as much as possible before bed. If you have family or friends who can give you a bit of relief that is also brilliant.

Good luck, and it does get better

I did pick up pick down with the whimpers and crying, worked fairly quickly. Have you propped head end of the cot up so it's not flat?