best stretch of sleep at the "wrong time" :(

[catherineangelmusick]

HI ladies! Any thoughts on this?
My 14 week old sleeps through, if you want to use the medical definition of that which is apparently a 5 hour stretch, BUT she does it from 6.45 - midnight! or thereabouts. very occasionally she might go until 3, which bless her, is a long time when she was last fed around 6!
I just wondered - is there any way I can get round this needing to go to bed so early, because with the best intentions, I cannot really go to bed at 6.45 every evening in order that I get enough sleep?! (although I bet I could tonight!!.... Last night she slept soundly, not even a grizzle, from 6.45- 12.30 then woke every three hours when i breastfed her as she was hungry... So Im knackered!! Im not complaining that much though I know it could be much worse!!

I just wonder if I could shift her bedtime to a more of a matching time to mine- 9pm??! But she just screams and screams with over tiredness-even at 6.45 pm and even with a nap at 5/6 pm which I know you aren't "supposed to do" Bless her- she is asleep before i have even got her head on the mattress!!!!

She does nap through the day, albeit not for that long always. But I try to be vigilant about it.

Anyone got any experience on this?

Thanks XXXXX

I am not any kind of expert but maybe my reply will give you a bump to someone wiser - I think a nap quite close to bedtime is ok at this stage if she is tired - my DD used to do that until 6 months ish.

Have you considered dream feeding her when you are ready to go to bed - eg 10 pm to see if she can then last until 3 more often and gradually stretch her sleep that way? Obviously there is a small risk she will then wake at the same time anyway but it's worth a try.

Sounds like you are doing well. My DS is same age and sleeps from midnight - which is good but means no evening.

Hi liveinthepresent!

Yes- its a toss up whether it's better to have an evening again or more sleep! Its nice to be able to watch something on telly but then again I am sitting there thinking I really need to get to bed so I still can't relax!! I have struck a balance by getting into bed about 9 and listening to my audiobook for a bit while she's sleeping peacefully next to me- it's lovely!
Anyway- the dreamfeeding. I tried it about a week or so ago and the first night she drank it all (bottle) - was AMAZING! She went through tip 4 and i thought my prayers had all been answered. Then the next night I went to do it and she literally clamped her little mouth shut and wouldn't let me do it! Then the third night I kind of managed to get it in her mouth but she refused to drink even when I did the twist it round to get the reflex going thing. So I gave up! i was absolutely gutted!!! My friend said I should have persevered but really?! It seemed clear to me she wasn't going to have any of it!! Did you have the same issue?
xxxx

It's so tough isn't it! When ds was younger we went to bed together at 10pm and I would often get 7hrs uninterrupted. Now he goes to bed at 6:30pm so even when he was sleeping well I would get no more than 5hrs (he is now sleeping badly after 4mth sleep regression but that's a whole other issue!) I do know people who's babies sleep 10pm-10am but they say this is because they can't get them to settle with an early bedtime so they are following their baby's rhythm. I have found that overall things work better if you follow your baby's lead - if she is really tired and wants to go to bed at 6:45pm I think you will not have fun trying to alter this though I'm sure it is possible. I've decided that the long term benefit of an early bedtime is worth the interrupted sleep as once he is sleeping through (a far off dream lol) I will get evenings and a good nights sleep. If you can get your dd to have a later bedtime you will eventually have to bring it back to being early when she starts nursery, school etc. Also most baby activities are timed on the assumption that lo is napping around 9am & 1pm so you may find you are out of sync with the rest of the baby world! I hope things get better, I'm also rarely getting more than 3hrs sleep uninterrupted at the moment, it really is depressing to be more tired than I was when he was 2months old! Good luck :)

Hi OP - I typed a long reply yesterday which disappeared and have only just found energy to try again!
I dreamfed my DD for months - I was BF - she used to close her mouth and make it impossible but I kept trying and eventually she would feed really well without so much as stirring - so,it may be worth persisting.
littlebag makes very good points about shifting it later only to need to move it again later on.
I guess also if you get any 4 month regression it may alter this anyway so you might regret doing anything drastic.
I know how you both feel - I had been getting 6+ hours when DS was tiny but since about 9 weeks he has been so unpredictable I can't see a time where he is asleep in the evenings.
I know from DD though that they will all get there. - and in a couple of years this phase will be a warm hazy memory of tiny baby days.
Your DD sounds like she is doing really well