2.8 settling/ sleep horror! Please help.

[TwinkleSparkleBling]

DD1 is 2.8 and we're having real sleep problems.

She gets up at 5.30-6am, has a nap 1-4pm in the afternoon and we put her to bed at 7pm. We have to have a list of stories, then songs before she'll even begin to settle. She then keeps calling out for juice/mummy/poo etc until about 9pm.

It's killing me. I could do the late sleep or the early start but not both.

She also wakes in the night and comes into bed with me and DH from anything between 11pm-3am. This is accompanied by intermittent calls for juice. When she's in with us I never really sleep properly because of lack of room etc.

When she was little we did the rapid return (I think it's called) where we left her to cry for up to 4 mins then went back and patted, soothed etc. It worked until she got to about 16 months and now we have this nightmare. We haven't tried this again as she just shouts and screams if we try and leave her at settle down time or put her back to bed in the night. I am worried she'll wake DD2 up.

So overall I am at the end of my tether. I am so tired and worn down I could cry.

Help!

SHes at the age where she doesnt need a nap now. Certainly not a 3 hour nap. Wake her after 1 hour, see if that helps. Then take away the nap altogether.

DFC is same age - wakes at 6am and goes to bed at 7pm, no naps.

No answers from me I'm afraid, but lots of sympathy. We have the same with DC3 ever sine she moved to a bed. Her room is too scary and bed is boring!

Perhaps a shorter afternoon nap is needed?

DD2 is currently crashing out between 9 and 10.30 getting up at about 7, with an occasional nap, this isn't enough, but I want her to get earlier in the evening, rather than sleeping all day. We don't mind her in with us too much at night (we have a superking!), but I need peace in he evening.

Good luck

DS is 2.2 and fairly recently we followed controlled crying to the letter - took 3 nights and he was sorted. Still gets out of sync occasionally but going back to the book always works. I'm rubbish at links but i found a good book is Toddler Taming by Christoper Green, it talks you through controlled crying step by step. Not for everyone, I know, but works for me

(Also 3 hrs seems like long afternoon nap - you could perhaps try keeping it to 2 he's and see if that helps her go down easier at night?

Good luck!

Thanks for your comments. I've also thought that the nap might be a problem but she really doesn't seem to be able to cope without it.

For example, we went out for the day a few weeks ago and she didn't have a nap. She fell asleep on the way home about 6pm in the car (bonus!) but it didn't change the early start or the disrupted night. Then for the next two days she was really tired and out of sync.

Do you think if I cut it down she might sleep better at night/go down earlier and therefore be less tired overall though?

oooh oooh can I link you to my thread? You got to try Sleep Sleep Sleep Now Child. I won't type it all, it's too long winded, so read my thread (it's not a long one). I have had such problems with DS aged 3.5. I played that CD to him this evening and he was asleep within 20 mins (probably much quicker than that but I was afraid to check on him!).

Honestly. Check it out. On Amazon for £12.99 or iTunes for £7.99.

I am so gonna shout about this thanks to a fab MNer for recommending it.

here is my thread

i do think you need to scrap the nap. Let her adjust to a 6pm bedtime for a while. Then you have at least got your evening back.

Broken nights will take a while to settle, but what have you got to lose...you already have broken nights. Maybe settle her with a 6pm bedtime and then gradually introduce controlled crying to get her to settle in her own bed. Might take a few days, but its no worse than your current situation, because you already have disturbed nights. AT least this way, you will be able to see some light at the end of the tunnel.

I have the same and have cut the nap down to a hour maximum, which is definitely helping with going to sleep in the evenings, although the early mornings remain!

I agree about the nap.. My DDis the same age and always slept well, 8pm till about 8.30 or 9am and a 2.5 hour nap about 12.30pm..

She started to wake early, cry and call for us when going to bed and get up about 2/3 am and end up in bed with us.

I made sure I woke her after 45mins when she had her nap and although for the first few days she was moody and trying to go back to sleep, she became used to it and is now back to sleeping 8-8.30 and is much less moany in general. We give her a bath at 7, toothbrush and DVD at 7.30, and bed at 8 with no crying.

Hth