Please help, GP driving me up the wall!

[susanmt]

My GP is making me nervous. My dd2 is 10 weeks old and a good sleeper - we realise we are lucky after having had 2 that didn't sleep so well. She sleeps from about 9pm - 7am most nights, and YES! I know how lucky I am!!!!

The thing is, I am taking quite a bit of medication, all of which is safe in breastfeeding (have done the research myself as the doctors know nothing about this, lucky for me I am doing bfc training and know where to look) but the GP has been twitchy for a while about it and last week phoned the local paediatricians who said it was 'highly unusual and worrying' that my dd was sleeping so well at night.

Through the day she is perfectly normal - bright and cheerful and fun, smiling big gummmy grins and watching all that goes on in the house. She has 3 or so naps in the course of the day then settles down for the big nighttime sleep.

I can't just avoid the GP, as I have to see her regulalry for prescriptions. I'm terrified they are going to take my painkillers away from me, as I am still passing the occasional kidney stone and it is agony. My dh (who is also a GP) has tried to explain, but they have decided that he is 'too emotionally involved'.

I feel the subtext is that they want me to stop breastfeeding dd2. I'm not prepared to do this as the other medication I am on is for severe PND and I know that breastfeeding is good for the bonding I feel isn't happening just now, and also it's the only thing I'm sure I'm doing well (objectively I know I'm doing OK, but thats different from 'feeling' like a good mum).

Please tell me that there are other babies out there of 3 months and under who sleep WELL. I want to be able to show my GP that it's normal (or withing the normal range). I dread her referring dd2 to see the paediatrician, because if I don't take her (which would be my instinct) then I could be reported to social work because I am depressed and they would worry that I'm not looking after her properly.

AAAAAAAAAAAAArrrgh!

My 12 week old has been having a good 10-12 hour stretch every night since he was about 6 weeks. I often have to wake him up in the morning if we've somewhwere to go. DD was the same from about 3 weeks.

And, yes, I'm definitely quitting whilst ahead! There's no way I'd get 3 in a row!

DD isn't quite as good as yours, but from 1 week was sleeping 11.30 until 7ish and now is starting to get the hang of evenings, so can go from 9.30/10ish til 7 on occasion. She has the odd bad night or two, but compared to my first two who didn't gleep through until 18 mths+ she's an angel. She's 14 weeks.

Surely if your DD was being affected by your meds, she would be dozy etc all through the day not just sleeping well at night?!

Can't your DH act as your GP, or is that unethical/immoral (whatever!) ?

My dd slept through from 11pm-7am from 3 weeks and from around 9.30pm-7.30am from 6 weeks.

She was a nightmare sleeper during the day, it was very hard to get her to settle for the naps she needed.

Could you not get your bfc trainer to speak to your GP ?

Certainly if I was in your position I'd collate as much info as possible to justify your (correct IMHO) decision to breastfeed your baby so if you DO get a referral you can show the paed that you are acting responsibly.

PS I'd also be extremely angry as you are quite obviously doing as much as you can to help your baby and yourself deal with a very tough time. Hugs

Lydia - handy though it would be for dh to be my GP, and though it's legal (and happens in very remote places) it's looked upon as highly unethical. In our case, I need strong painkillers (pethedine) for kidney stone pain and if he was prescribing that for me it would look very odd to other docs and to anyone who came checking as it is a controlled drug with all kind of regulations around it.
I wish it could be so - he's a great doc and everyone round here loves him. My GP is great too, just a bit twitchy!

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Oh Susan,
This sounds like a nightmare in reverse. Your darling daughter sleeps like an angel and the professionals don't like it !!

I'd get all your evidence together that you have about your meds, and present it all to your GP. Does she work in the same practice as your dh, could you all sit down together to discuss it rationally?

If that doesn't work, and you do get referred, I'd definately take your evidence and your dh along to see the paed, who will surely listen to what your dh says, if not you.

I would have thought that your dd being bright and alert during the day would have proved something. I guess your GP is 'watching her own back', frightened that it could come back on her if something turned out to be wrong later.

Oh, and just to say, I don't think any of us 'felt like a good mum', especially in the first few weeks.
Don't let your GP upset you too much, remember all that sleep is helping you beat the PND

My ds1 slept from about 9pm until 7/8am from about 8 weeks. Sounds like your GP is worrying you unneccesarily (sp?!).

You don't need this at the moment - I would just lie to shut him up and say she has started waking a few times a night.

My first baby slept 12hrs at night from about 3weeks - boy, did I have a shock when I had baby No2! I think it's in the minority but not that unusual for a 10wk old to sleep all night, surely? Hope you win this battle, Susan, take care.

Sorry if this is a really stupid comment - but why don't you just tell your GP that your dd has started to wake up again during the night - which lots of babies do after a period of good sleeping?

Hey I thought my kids were amazing (slept 7 to 7 before 16 weeks) but the lady I work with has this with her 13 weeks old ! And he's been doing it for at least 1 week if not longer. All the babies are 100% breatsfed.

ha ha ha ha
doctors! (obviously some are ok )
My dd 14 hrs at 6 weeks, she had slow weight gain too, imagine the fuss! Told them all to sod off and leave me to it.
She is now a skinny 13 hr a night 16 mth old
I wish they could just acknowledge, some babies are born to sleep and some aren't - I have had one of each so totally know the difference!
Arm yourself with evidence and ask for a second and third opinion. If they say that smokers babies are better off breastfeeding than bottlefeeding then they are hard pushed to negate any other drugs! So long as weight is being gained, baby is happy and developing "normally" (a whole other story) then relax and believe in yourself....
GRRR!!!

DS1 slept 12 hours at that age, with one or two wakes for a five minute feed.
If they were really worried, wouldn't they test dd's blood for levels? A lot less drastic than giving up bfeeding, IMO.
I agree that dd would be drowzy during the day if affected. I would do as someone else suggested and tell them she's waking in the night.

susamnt, I'm so sorry you've got this additional worry. ffs! My dd (about same age as yours, born end Nov 03) sleeps from 10pm - 7am or sometimes later atm. I know it could change but she seems to be doing it fairly consistently, with the odd night where she wakes.

Yep, both of mine slept through from 6 weeks.

I'm worried about telling the GP that she is now waking as I havent needed the painkillers for several days and I just know she will make that connection!!!
The teacher in me just screeches 'I want everyone to know that this is OK!!! We have made an appointment for Thursday with the other GP inthe practice (my usual one isn't in on that day!!!) to discuss things as dh has a lot more confidence in his judgement (like he has children, where normal GP doesnt) which dh is coming with me to, so hopefully it will set things straight.

If you haven't used the painkillers for a bit and she is still sleeping well (unless I missed something) then she is obviously just a good sleeper. Good luck with your appointment.

I agree with bobthebaby, you could now say that you've done your own mini-experiment and she's still sleeping well.

A family friend of ours used to be a HV and she's noticed that mums with PND often have babies who sleep well. I had it early on with DS1 and he certainly followed this pattern. Unscientifically, I see it as nature's way of reducing a bit of stress and keeping things safe. This theory also fits in with those who see mother and baby as a unit, sometimes called motherbaby, in which one will respond to the other's needs.
HTH