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Need help with 8 month old sleep!

5 replies

rachyconks · 28/07/2013 08:57

My DD has just turned 8 months old. She has never slept a full night. The best we have ever managed was one night at 5 weeks she slept 12-6am. A typical night could she us in with her 10 or more times. Some nights she wakes every 30mins-1hour. Most sleep stretches are around two hours. On rare nights she might do one sleep stretch of 4 hours.

DH and I are at breaking point. Not only because we are sleep deprived, but also we want to help her get a good nights sleep, which she is obviously not getting at the moment. We have recently sorted out her naps and got her into a routine with them. She has 1hour at 10am and 1.5-2hrs at 2pm. Bedtime routine great bath, book, bottle, bed by 8pm. She can fall asleep on her own in the cot at bedtime and naptime. When she wakes up at night, sometimes she is wide awake, singing away. Other times its full on wailing until one of us goes in. We still give her a bottle during the night. I know some will disagree with this, but I don't know how to drop it without making matters worse.

In order to settle her we either have to lift her, cuddle, starts falling asleep, put back, wakes up, repeat ad infinitum or pat her and sooth her until she drops off. We had tried CC (although prob not effectively as it broke my heart and she has a LOT of willpower) and No Cry Sleep Solution. She hasn't even slightly responded to these. Settling her is never instantaneous, it can take anywhere from 5 mins to 2 hours. I am happy she is well fed, not too warm or isn't in pain or anything.

I should also say, we co-slept until about 5/6 months, but she seems ok in her cot now and took to it no problem. She also has all her naps in her cot.

Please help! I think I need a miracle. I can't spend another night in tears at 4am with a screaming baby.

TIA

OP posts:
MB34 · 29/07/2013 12:19

Hi, I have no advice really, just offering my sympathies as I'm in the same boat.
Ds is 8 months and apart from a few slight differences, I could've written your post.
The only thing I do to get by at the moment is I sleep in DSs room and do the night wakings, then in the morning DH takes him and I get another couple of hours sleep. I'm lucky though in the DH works shifts so is home most nights/mornings.

I hope someone will be along to give some better advice soon

sejeff · 01/08/2013 21:55

Hi, I have similar problem with my 8mth old! !

He wakes about 4times during night sometimes more. the maximum he goes without waking is 3hrs and thats on a really good night.

We are still giving a bottle in the night too...although I am sure he's not hungry but usually in desperation I give it. I know its probably not helping matters but will work on that!

He co-slept with me till recently and naps fine in cot.

I am trying as of last night controlled crying. .. so night# 2 as I write! Was hell last night....felt awful but hoping it will get easier each night.
He has stirred once already but settled much quicker. Had to stay really strong as like u said u need will power and support to do it. I really feel he has lost any ability to self sooth.
I let you know how I get on. ..am desperate for sleep and normality too!

Sorry I haven't given you both advice but sometimes nice knowing you are not alone with this! !

BuntyCollocks · 02/08/2013 14:10

I'm in the same boat, although my dd is 7 months. Have tried cc (like yours, my dd has a lot of stamina, and I can't leave her any longer than five minutes when she is breaking her heart), I've tried gradual retreat - retreating didn't happen as she just lay awake for two hours, alternately sobbing and laughing at me/trying to play ...

Am seriously considering leaving her next weekend when it is time for naps and night time, and giving her to my dmil to do cc. She is harder than me. As long as she's fed, dry etc she'll try.

My ds was much easier.

Cnix · 02/08/2013 21:17

The only way I was able to get my dd to settle herself back to sleep when she wakes in the night was to stop feeding her. It was a lot easier than I expected. I just went in and out to her every minute or two and told her to go back to sleep. Sometimes I would sit beside her with my hand on her back until she went back to sleep. Now when she wakes in the night she will give a few cries but she knows she's not getting fed and that I won't be coming in to her and then she's back to sleep. Obviously if she is giving a very different cry indicating something actually is wrong then I won't ignore her!

Mehrida · 02/08/2013 22:00

This was me with DS until he was six months. It was sheer hell. I was so tired I couldn't see straight. The first night he slept thru was a culmination of:

-first tooth had just appeared. Even now when he's teething we regress to this sleep pattern. Fortunately this only lasts a few nights at a time now.
-I dropped the night feed.
-we gave in and let him have a dummy (well, five all round his head) for bed only. I was a dummy snob but it has really saved my sanity - I value my sleep more than my own snobbery!

We nearly shit a brick when we woke at 7am and had to rush thru to check on him!

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