Chatting after lights out

[ZenGardener]

My twin boys are four and share a room, no choice there. During the day they are really active and talk to each other non-stop. The problem is at bedtime I have the same problem.

We have a typical bedtime routine, bath, pyjamas, milk, brush teeth, wee, bedtime story, lights out. They are tired but as soon as the lights go out the silliness starts. Chatting, playing around, stupid noises etc.

I often end up having to sit in with them to police them which isn't easy as I have a younger daughter who is a night owl. It often takes an hour or more to settle them.

They are often tired in the morning and its hard to get them up for pre-school.

My cousin suggested putting them to bed an hour earlier with a DVD to help them switch off. I'm not sure though. Does anyone else have any suggestions?

If I leave them to it they will literally keep going until 1am when I just totally lose my temper. Especially one has always fought sleep ever since he was a baby.

hi

I have 4 year old twin boys in same room

one seems to want to sleep, the other to mess about
we do the bedtime story and then make threats to keep them in bed

luckily the sleepy one goes down but the silly one can take a while to settle

we are thinking short term rewards for behaving at night time to work as an incentive for the silly one

other ideas needed

I DON'T have twin 4yos BUT I do have a 4yo singleton (dc4) and I currently have to sit on the landing until he is asleep as otherwise he is off into the bathroom/siblings's rooms/downstairs.

Only mentioning it in case it is partly an age thing.

Fwiw I'm on the landing now and use the time to read/Mumsnet/do bugger all

Thanks, perhaps it's just a developmental stage and it will get easier or maybe something I just have to accept. Maybe I should try leaving them to it.

I try to explain to them about things they are looking forward to doing tomorrow and how much better it will be if they are not tired. I also try to be strict about not letting them oversleep in in the morning.

Twin 2, often complains that he can't sleep. I think he has trouble switching off. He soon goes off though when he stops talking!

I forgot to mention that my husband works away during the week so I am on my own. I don't get much downtime if they don't go to sleep until 10pm.

My twins are much younger so no advice I'm afraid,but just wanted to say that screen time, eg the DVD you mention, just before bed is meant to make it more difficult for them to switch off. Maybe a story cd instead?

My dh works away too - it does make for a very long day, especially by Thursday evening! Which is why I no longer worry about my hour in the landing and play on here

I would stay away from DVDs etc only because current thinking seems to be that backlit screens (so TVs, iPads, iPods, laptops) can affect seratonin (?) so stimulating rather than calming. Usual numpty disclaimer applies here

All of mine except dc4 have CD players to have either story CDs or calm music playing (Eva Cassidy - sends me off to sleep!!) I can really recommend the Bedtime Stories read by Johnny Morris - we got them from eBay. I think it gives them something to concentrate on and stops their brains whirring round!

Fwiw, I'm on the landing now and have been since 7.45. Dc4 is rolling round in his bed. I ignore him until he tries to get out or starts talking, then I just quietly tell him to get back into bed / stop talking. There are many things I would rather be doing but like you say, if I don't he will be in and out of dc2 & 3's rooms and stating about until 9-10 o'clock and I really will get NO evening at all!

today we threatened no legoland tomorrow. it didn't work so now me and dh are going on our own

not sure how we are going to sort that one out in the morning

Oh superbagpuss that's a tricky one

I can sympathise. I have a 4yr old DD and she is soooo good at trying my patience at bedtime. I know I need to be more firm and stop giving into her every request - drinks, toilet, different pyjamas...! What does sometimes work is the promise of a reward in the morning - sometimes we do marbles in a jar (with a present when it's full), or sweets (bad parent alert!).

I think a story CD is a great idea, something to make them want to be quiet for a while. DVD is really tempting but I think it's widely accepted that screen time makes it hard for your brain to switch off. Or staggered bed time taking turns to have a little quality time with you alone?

Thanks I will give the CDs a go next week.

Staggered bedtimes would be difficult. They are very strong-willed and competitive. There would be huge arguments about who got to stay up later. If they ask why DD can stay up later I just explain that she had a nap so isn't tired.

Last night Twin 1 was being noisy so I told him if he continued to be noisy he would have to go and sleep in daddy's room on his own. That actually worked! He's a real mummy's boy.

day out at Legoland
both asleep in minutes

probably not practical for everyday .

Actually after two late nights mine went off quicker tonight too.

Glad you had a good day out'