disturbing nightmares

[Roundtheruggedrocks]

I have a neurological/vascular disease which goes in periods of attack and remission. When I am going into and coming out of attacks, I have some really terrible nightmares, but there is no documented connection between the condition and nightmares.

What I find very hard to deal with is what happens in the nightmares is very out of character for me, and I find it hard to even talk about them to anyone in RL. The first one last night was a very standard nightmare - a passenger plane crash being watched from below landing on my house, debris flying everywhere, my family dying etc.

The second and worse one was me purchasing (somehow) a baby and physically attacking it until it eventually died, which is a recurring nightmare I have. There is never any intention in the dream to hurt it, but somehow I feel it happens out of my control and it causes me a lot of distress. It's like I am watching attacks on this helpless baby and being disturbed, then finding out at the end of the dream when it dies, that it was me who attacked and killed it. I also have the same dreams about animals.

Other dreams I have are a lot to do with disfigurement of people I love to the point they are unrecognisable. I have dreams of my maimed father pouring with blood trying to drag himself towards me on his hands and stomach, but being pulled away from him by someone else.

Do other people have these kind of dreams too? Really visually graphic dreams of disturbing things that play no part in your otherwise normal existence?

What do you do about them?

Goodness your nightmares sound terrifying. I rarely get nightmares now but had awful recurring ones as a child/teenager, not dissimilar to yours: my family would be electrocuted and I had caused it (not on purpose, but was powerless not to do it; I would be arrested for things I would never do in real life but knew I had done in the nightmare etc.

One of the things I think helped me was telling people about the nightmares. I couldn't voice them for years but the more I spoke about them the less they seemed to come. I also visualised the nightmare when I was awake but changed the ending if that makes sense? I imagined it but pictured it as not scary.

I understand you are reluctant to tell friends/family but what about talking to a therapist? What does your doctor say?

Can't be of any help but I used to have nightmares like this time too, usually a few a month. They stopped once I had my first DC, I think because I wasn't getting enough sleep to actually dream? anyway they haven't returned since and that was 7 years ago now.

I used to be absolutely terrified and the images would stay with me all day, like my own personal horror movies. (& I never ever watch actual horror movies, too scary!)

Would be fascinating to know if there was an actual cause of them. I can still remember the 'plot' of most of them now?

Just realised I haven't had one since DC either Flutter! Interesting...