18mo night weaning to improve sleeping - tips needed!

[Kracken]

Having spent the last six months hoping that my DD will start sleeping through on her own, I think the time has come to take action! The main problem, when she's not teething or ill, is that when she wakes she wants a bottle of milk. At 18 months and on three meals and two snacks a day I think she no longer needs milk at night!

She settles for her one nap (after lunch) and at bedtime really well. She has a bottle of milk before bedtime (also before some naps but we are trying to phase this out) then goes down awake in her cot and usually goes off to sleep fine. Bedtime is 7pm.

She then wakes, normally once but it can be a couple of times, anytime between 11pm and 4am. Lots of fairly hysterical crying which quickly escalates if we don't go in to comfort her. We have tried cuddling and patting back to sleep which occasionally works, but usually we give up after 30mins or so and give her the bottle which she drinks most of (200ml) and then goes to sleep, normally for the rest of the night unitl 7am ish.

Has anyone had any experience of stopping night bottles at this age? Should we just go cold turkey or reduce the amount gradually or offer water in a bottle or beaker instead? She drinks water or milk in a beaker during the day.

Thanks so much for your help!

Hey....I had/have exactly the same problem with my DS who is nearly 20 months. He is a very good eater and more or less exactly word for word the same as your dc.
I hate giving him milk in the night but my dh thinks it's fine (drivesmecrazy!). SO what I did was, I did all night wakings and I started offering him water in a beaker at night....most times he'd refuse and kick off. But sometimes he'd have a bit. Now if he wakes we don't go into him. Sounds harsh but it isn't really. He seems to be getting the idea. He does still wake up sometimes but he generally settles quite quickly. If he does get really upset (only happened once/twice in the past few weeks) I will go into him but just give him a cuddle. I do not offer him anything in the night anymore. If he was ill I may go back to water in a beaker...but other than that nothing.
I think my ds gets hot sometimes....but I find it hard to control the temp in his room....warm in evening when he goes to bed but feels chilly in morn. I think this contributes to the situation.
I will be watching with interest to see if anyone comes up with any better ideas....I'm sure we aren't out of the woods yet by any means.
Just so you know you are not alone. Hope things improve soon.

My friend has just resolved this similar problem. Although her dd is about 2.5.

What she did was start to put a bit of water in the milk, gradually increasing water and reducing milk each night. And when it got to mostly water her dd gave up waking.

May not work but probably worth a shot.

forced, it sounds like we are in a very similar boat!! Can I ask, what was the 'kicking off' like when you first started offering only water? Did he cry a bit then settle then wake up again or did her sleep through after settling? The reason I ask is that the few times I have managed to resist giving a bottle and she has settled she's then woken crying again after 30-45mins and the whole thing starts again...

KD0706 that sounds like a nice approach, do you know roughly how long it took your friend's dd to stop waking?

Really want to get this sorted, have been back at work full time for six months now and am beyond tired!!

I think it was under two weeks. She's on holiday or else I'd ask her for you. It wasn't overnight. But certainly not weeks and weeks.

I think the problem is that they get used to having this nice filling drink in the middle of the night. We've recently (fingers crossed, touch wood) had to deal with similar with my breastfeeding dd2. I think a lot of its habit. It's just how to gently change their pattern.

I think if you're not keen on leaving her to cry its worth trying the water and milk thing. I doubt it will make matters any worse!

Good luck with it.

We nightweaned from breastfeeding at about a similar age so slightly different but what I found worked was:

• start off by making sure that any bedtime milk is separate from going to sleep. Eg, bottle then story then into cot. This made a HUGE difference to how prepared he was to go back to sleep in the middle of the night without a feed.

• when DS woke, we'd go into him, offer a drink of water and cuddle him over the side of the cot - getting him out just made him furious and we don't leave him to cry. After a while, he would lay down of his own accord and go to sleep. After a few nights of this he started sleeping through but with an early ish (5.30am) wake

Also a friend recommended offering a banana / weetabix after bathtime just to make sure that they are well tanked up to see them through the night

Thanks so much sugar, I think you are right, the key here is breaking the association of a bottle and sleep. We don't really have a fixed bedtime story at the moment so I think I will start by introducing that as the last thing that happens before a cuddle and going into her cot. I think I will also chuck the bottles and go on to a beaker, but probably not making both changes at the same time!

We are off to stay with my mum this weekend for two weeks so project night weaning will start on our return, I will come back and update!