My DD1 is 18m/o. Her father began regular contact at 12 months after seeing her once every month or 2, showing very little interest before that. He now see's her once-twice a week for 4-5 hours. He wants overnights and is threatening court although we are otherwise amicable.
The problem is DD is still co-sleeping and BFing during the night. She wakes up 2-3 times, and doesn't cry as long as I am in the bed, just has a little comfort feed for a few minutes then goes back to sleep. If I have snuck out of the bed while she's asleep and she wakes she will cry until I am physically touching her again. Just being in the room doesn't calm her yet.
None of this bothers me and I preferably would like to continue co-sleeping as I find it a lovely experience. I am also hoping to let her self wean so the feeds aren't much of an issue (yet.. I would like to cut it down to max 1 during the night by 2 y/o preferably)
The problem is she doesn't seem at all ready for overnights yet. I have tried to get him to do 3 bedtimes at our house after him saying he wants overnights, and he gave up after 20-30 mins of her crying each time. He is now saying that he wants her in her own bed and weaned from breastfeeding within 2 months, then staying at his every other friday a month after that or he will go to court.
I am unsure what a court would say at this age, but I don't want to stop co-sleeping or breastfeeding until DD is ready, though if necessary I understand she may have to go for overnights before she is ready.
Is there any sleep evidence on young toddlers that I could show him about overnights, or any advice on what to say to him to get him to understand that she isn't ready yet?
I have offered more daytime contact, but he said he only has time for overnights.