10 month old sleep issues

[ditziness]

She's 10 months.she's never slept more than three hours. The last two weeks she's been waking 6-10 times a night. She screams so loud that she wakes the neighbours, who I can hear talking now. She's already been screaming six times tonight since 10pm. It's like torture. It's effecting how i feel about her, I'm genuinely less patient, I just hate her right now.

Hate co sleeping, can't sleep with her next to me in my arm pit pinching me and sucking. Can't stand the nagging feeling that that's the reason she sleeps so crap. Can 't do cc anymore either, the noise of her crying just makes me sob and feel like my head is going to explode. She doesn't give in either, none of this cries for an hour the first night, but sleeping happily ever after by the third. She just screams for hours until she gets fed.

I hate this. I don't know what to do

[Figgygal]

Hope you have a better night tonight OP

[ditziness]

thanks everyone. just going to bed. fingers crossed.

thank for the support everyone, it's really good to be understood. i appreciate it. Lots of more good suggestions again, I'll look through them properly tomorrow.

I fed my son till he was 18 months. I really would prefer to keep breastfeeding. just not every hour over night that's all. thanks. By the time my son was my daughter's age he'd given up night feeds.

Are you wanting to move my thread to sleep Olivia?

oh and the comment that everyone thought was nasty had already been deleted when i read. what did it say?

[Idocrazythings]

You already have loads of tips to try, but I wonder if she's maybe a little overstimulated at bed time and getting a bit wound up? Such as was asleep then woken for more milk, nappy, Pjs and story. And/or maybe too used to the sleep aids (cd, hammock); and then when she wakes later can not self settle as is needing those aids?

Could you try slowly removing them, over time not in one night, maybe substituting them with a little patting by you, and then reducing that until its just your presence.

Personally I would avoid introducing a dummy if she hasn't had one yet because, she'll inevitably lose it then wake and you'll have to find it, it's another thing potentially you'll have to remove down the track; they are not that good for teeth and jaw development and you've got this far without it. I'd also avoid the latex teat as they can trigger latex allergy.

I also agree with other posters about keeping up the b/feeding. Just had another thought though- are you drinking extra caffeine/tea/coke to keep on top of your tiredness? If so maybe that's affecting her? Or maybe it's a "stage" and it will pass?

disclaimer. My own DC are crap sleepers- feel free to ignore me if you wish

[McGilly]

Good luck and remember the support. One more thought from the mum of crap sleepers - BFing might be a useful tool to keep in your armoury of tricks for a bit longer . But you decide - you've done amazingly well already and you know yourself and your baby best.

[McGilly]

We have tried cranial osteopaths in past. Expensive, helped some tummy issues in the past but not sleep.
Our 1 yo is still sleeping next to me too, by necessity. I think this is our main night waking issue.
My final solution is no solution - we co- sleep (uncomfortably!), minimise non-essential activities and remember that first two kids were the same. They are now brilliant sleepers.
I do feel for you if you are going back to work. That adds a new stress to the mix. Hang in there!

[mathanxiety]

I second eliminating many elements from the bedtime routine. Maybe move the bath to right after lunch when she wakes from afternoon nap? No need for a story for a 10 month old either. Maybe it would be better to focus on putting her in her cot in a quiet and darkened room and then helping her to relax when she's there.

Is her cot in your room? Would you be able to have it beside your bed so you could avoid having her in your armpit, maybe give her a finger to suck on instead of your boob, or reach out and rock the cot gently or rub he back?

I agree your DH may be able to give her a night time bottle or some comfort in order to facilitate night weaning. Sometimes babies will accept a bottle from a dad or other carer whereas the mother means the breast and the bottle just won't do from that source.

However, I also agree with those suggesting allergies. I weaned my DD1 completely from the breast at about 1 year as she was waking 10 times a night and it was murder. I was a complete zombie and desperate. exH had never really thought much of bfeeding and blamed it for the waking. So I weaned her -- and it didn't help. It was only useful because I found out she was allergic to dairy thanks to formula.

[Napsalot]

Lack of sleep is so tough. Big hugs to you.

My advice:

• come up with your plan for the night with your DH and stay the course as best you can. I have always found I don't make good decisions at 3am when dealing with a cranky baby! Always feel much more in control when we have mapped out a plan and both know what we intended to do when baby woke up next. You can change course if needed but I always feel better being able to go on auto pilot.
  

• life feels much more manageable after you have had a good nap or even better a good nights sleep. Even though your tiredness is months in the making, one good sleep will do wonders to how you feel. I always think when your sleep deficit is so great it will take forever to feel human again and I am amazed at how better I feel when I finally get a nap.
  

You will feel better soon.

[letsgetreadytoramble]

I had a bottle refuser and had success eventually with a playtex bottle and latex teat. I have a spare bottle and new teat if you'd like it, along with some inserts, just pm me your address (he takes tommee tippee now thank goodness.)

[kungfupannda]

Not much advice here - I've got one good sleeper and one who's not too bad - but I did notice that you said that she's sleeping in a hammock. DS1 had a hammock until he went into a cot. DS2 slept ina co-sleeper but we used the hammock for when I was up in London (DP works up there during the week so we used to go up for a couple of nights) and on holiday.

DS1 loved the hammock. DS2 never really got on with it. He had a few weeks of sleeping okay in it, and then he started thrashing about and yelling.

The shop we bought ours from, the owner said that although they are supposed to be suitable for up to 12 months, she'd used it for both of her children and found that they stopped sleeping well in it long before that.

Given that she's very close to the upper age limit, is it worth trying a cot? She may just not like the hammock.

[lola88]

I feel for you and hope you got some sleep. DS was the same and at some point i hated him so much for getting upthen felt so guilty for thinking i hated him, it's a horrible feeling and one that not alot of people in RL will understand or admit to.

When DS was 11mo i'd had enough was going back to work the following week so i got my mum to have him over night then the next night DP went in with water everytime he woke up, the first night he got up 5 times and cried or 30-60 mins the second night it got better and the 3rd he didn't wake til 5am at which time i gave him a feed. He's now 13mo and only gets up once for a feed and has slept 2 nights with no wakenings in the past 2 weeks. He's also a lot happier during the day and sleeps in his cot in his own bedroom all night every night. I couldn't believe how quickly he changed it was amazing even though the first few nights were not good.

Oh and DP took a few days off work at that time so he could be up all night and sleep in the morning

[BoffinMum]

You've had masses of advice here but I wonder if you have thought about putting the baby into daycare ASAP and getting some rest in the daytime before going back to work? Or putting off your return to work by a week or two?

[ditziness]

Thanks everyone again. Slept in the living room last night, and I got 3 hours sleep in a row! The baby was still up 7 times , but DH comforted her, and I just woke when she was going particularly ballistic at 1am for an hour ( neighbours were up for that too :-( heard them up ). So I feel a bit better. Didn't feed her between 11pm and 5 am too so maybe that's progress.

Going to try and do the same again tonight. Poor DH. Altho he has only just got up so he'll survive. :-)

Shall have a look at some of the suggestions later . Continued thanks

[Andratx]

Hi OP,
I am quite convinced that your baby is suffering from Silent Reflux. My baby had this and it is difficult to diagnose, but the treatment does make a big difference.....I think it's worth you having a look at the following link at the least, to see if this rings any bells?

voices.yahoo.com/the-symptoms-silent-reflux-118493.html

What is Silent Reflux?

Silent reflux can be very confusing; there may be no obvious signs of gastro-oesophageal reflux (such as vomiting) and the child generally isn?t ?silent?.

Silent reflux refers to refluxed material that flows back into the oesophagus, but isn?t forced out of the mouth. The child may swallow it back down or the stomach contents/stomach acids may not come up the oesophagus far enough to be swallowed. It has the potential to cause more damage because it can sit in the oesophagus longer than if the child vomited.

Medical intervention may be necessary because the same complications can arise as in other forms of gastro-oesophageal reflux; however, it may be harder to recognise without any noticeable vomiting. If they feed as a means of soothing their pain i.e are comfort feeders as well, then poor growth may not be an issue, and they may in fact have huge weight gains. This can also contribute to a delay in diagnosis.

Some people mistakenly believe the term ?silent reflux? refers to a child who does not cry with their reflux, but this is not the case.

[Idocrazythings]

If you went to a laleche meeting, you'd get all this information from the mothers there and the group leader has extra training and can help advise you too. Face to face is probably better than over the Internet for something like this

[Idocrazythings]

Or even ring there help line and chat to them, because even though your concern is sleep it is linked to feeding; and it would be a shame to give up if you weren't ready to

[Downandoutnumbered]

I really feel for you, OP. I had the same thing - DS was a bottle refuser and a terrible sleeper, and I went back to work when he was 6 months. I was so exhausted I just wanted to die. When he was 9 months we got a night nanny for five nights to night wean him - if you've got space and can afford it, I really recommend that. We sacrificed having a holiday that summer to be able to afford it - think it was about £650.

[Horsemad]

I haven't read through the thread so apologies if I'm repeating someone else's advice but will she drink from a sippy cup?

I b/f both my DC and switched eldest to formula when he was 6mths, but as he wouldn't take a bottle we tried with a cup and he happily dramk that.

Might be worth a try?

[girliefriend]

Whats a baby hammock?

< imagines babys swinging about like pirates >

[bangwhizz]

'You are talking rubbish bangwhizz if your only unhelpful comment is that the op should stop bf. ridiculous thing to say. End of. '

who the hell do you think you are with your ''end of'' command, which is tantamount to telling somebody to shut up.I did not say she should stop b'feeding.I said it might come down to a choice between good sleeping habits or b/feeding

[ditziness]

Oh just feeing so guilty tonight. She's such a lovely wee girl , just a wee baby. She looked so serious today. It felt really wrong not feeding her to sleep and cuddling her and stroking her little face. I love her so much. I hope she's ok.

[Beamur]

She will be fine.

[McGilly]

She's lovely because you are a good mum, not in spite of it! Guilt stalks fatigue .... I called my 1 yo a devil this morning ... Up every two hours all night, then awake at 6.30 for school . He is feeling great!

[Iwillorderthefood]

Hi, just read through this thread, just got another suggestion to check out. DD2 was a terrible sleeper from birth. We figured out eventually she had terrible glue ear and ear infections and was in a lot of pain. She was dosed up with the maximum of pain relief (GP calculated how much we could give).

Things got really bad when I stopped bf as I went back to work.

She did not really improve until grommets were inserted when she was about 19 months old. It's worth a check.

[ditziness]

Actually the title of this thread is making me so sad. Mnhq, could you change it too " 10 month old sleep issues " and move the thread to sleep?

I feel really really sad tonight

[ditziness]

Yes will ask gp about ear infections and silent reflux.

And will think about everything else too .

She's enjoying holding a muslin , thanks to whoever suggested that.

Yes I want to get her out of the hammock into a cot, just waiting for her room!