What do you do with a 2 year old who screams for you not to leave the room?

[MakeTeaNotWar]

I am finding bedtime super stressful. DD is 2.6 and every bedtime is an enormous battle. After the pleas for another story, another story, a meltdown eventually ensues as she doesn't want to go to bed. She doesn't have a daytime nap so is clearly tired. DH is very calm with her and eventually gets her off but I am on a v short fuse as am mega sleep deprived from DS 5 months and her screaming invariably wakes him up.

Now DH is away for 2 weeks and I dread bedtime. We have a bath, story bed routine and I am mostly calm...until the meltdown starts and I lose my cool tonight I really shouted at her, left her crying and cried myself, feeling shit and already dreading tomorrow night (and the if to come as DS has never slept longer than 2 hours since birth)

Am rambling - please help- help me to keep calm and advise on how to get her off to sleep without resisting so much as it's very upsetting for all of us.

Oh bless you what crap timing for DH to be away.

Ok so if the routine is not working then have a rethink-sounds obvious but at these times you can't see the wood for the trees. Depends on wether you want to tackle a change in routine on your own.

Soounds a bit like she's over tired, does she still almost need a sleep & you're keeping her going to try & wear her out? A this age sometimes they don't need one every day but maybe 2-3 times a week a power nap earlier in the day can help later on, even if means putting bedtime back 30 minutes.

When mine were that age we swapped bath time to the morning (we were all up at sparrow fart anyway) which gave us a bit more time in the evening for winding down. Youngest was a nightmare so we tried the reverse psychology,

"Oh no it's not sleep time but it's quiet time let's read a story & have a cuddle" it did work, she inevitably drifted off. If not I'd save some laundry to put away in her room, and pootle around singing to/with her until she settled.

Just ideas, no magic formula, & an un MN hug. Have you any famnily that cold help a bit.

I used to lie down with DS until he fell asleep at that age. Perhaps you could start with this (or sit next to the cot if she isn't in a bed yet) and then try the technique of "Mummy just needs to go to the toilet but I'll be back in a minute, I promise" and just keep increasing the time you're gone for. - or start by lying in bed, then sitting on bed, sitting next to bed, sitting just too far away to touch, sitting by bedroom door, sitting just outside bedroom door. Gradual withdrawal :)

Dr Tanya Byron has a new show about sleep at the moment. I think (not sure) it's on Channel 4, maybe a Tuesday. I read about it in The Times last week.

I used to tell my DD I was just popping downstairs to put something away/lock the door/put the bin out/do some ironing/...... and that I'd be back in a couple of minutes. Always go back, but slowly stretch the couple of minutes out. Once she's confident you're coming back, she'll start to drift off without you.