Is mum insomnia inevitable??

[MillionPramMiles]

I'm really struggling to get to sleep, to fall back asleep after being woken by my 9 month old dd and to get back asleep after waking around 5am. The result is I'm absolutely shattered. I slept better when dd was a newborn for some reason, maybe cause all I had to do was feed her when she woke. Now I find myself listening out for her all night and wondering if she's lost her bunny or got her feet stuck between the cot bars or if she needs the dummy etc etc. it's really taking a toll on my relationship with my dp and on my health. Is this just normal motherhood???

Are you stressed? You sound a bit anxious if you are listening out for her all night.

I dont agree that its a normal part of motherhood no. If she sleeps you should too. Taking a while to fall asleep is one thing, but staying awake listening for her is another.

I think it's more that once I've been woken by dd a couple of times I then find it hard to go to sleep as I'm subconsciously waiting to be woken up again. I do feel stressed but only about the fact I'm not getting enough sleep and the impact that's having. I've always been a light sleeper so maybe that's just it. Might have to get some earplugs and put dp on night duty!

I had terrible mum-insomnia. I tried hypnotherapy (didn't work) so went to my GP who prescribed temazepam. She gave me 10 tablets. I cut them in half and took them for 20 nights and that sorted me out. Obviously I wasn't breastfeeding by that stage.

Ugh! This was me and it was AWFUL. DS was an early riser - any time from 5 - and when he was between 1 and 2yo we had to share a room. I found I'd wake at about 3.30 and be so anxious about needing to get back to sleep, knowing that he'd be up in no time - as well as trying not to breathe/roll over in case I woke him - that I couldn't sleep at all. I actually ended up getting quite ill for a couple of years afterwards, and I'm sure this was part of the reason. I tried everything at the time, inc sleeping pills, but nothing worked. Since then I've learned some meditation and nowadays when I wake in the night and start to panic, I use this. Works a treat for me; hope it helps you. And HUGE sympathies, it's GRIM.

This is me too. I find myself awake wondering when DS will wake and worrying it's him that's woken me and I haven't heard him properly. DS sleeps through and Iam a walking zombie. I blame the monitor, I can't switch off for listening for him.

Dunno if it's helpful but the fancy-pants angelcare monitor might be good as it has camera (for legs-through-bars type fears) and an alarm if your baby stops breathing. Sounds a bit bonkers but you might use this and be able to turn it down very low or mute, safe in the knowledge that if he really needs you you'll hear him. I don't think it's normal though, I imagine it's a vicious cycle and feel for you.

"I think it's more that once I've been woken by dd a couple of times I then find it hard to go to sleep as I'm subconsciously waiting to be woken up again."

this is me! I am also a very light sleeper... DD is in her own room next to ours, no monitor, and I STILL wake up if she so much as coughs or mumbles in her sleep, because I am wondering if it is a night waking... am seriously considering earplugs but slightly worry that I wouldn't hear her if she did genuinely wake.

Thx all for posts - last couple of nights I've slept in the spare room as its further from the nursery, with the door closed and no sound monitor (but a camera I can switch on if I need to) and that's been better. I still hear dd but not every slight grisle. Now if I could just do something about the aircraft noise I might get a decent nights sleep:)