Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

Flip

Original poster

Pregnant & DS is waking in the night.

13 replies

wellsie · 01/05/2006 20:47

We've been having problems with DS sleep since December when he climbed out of his cot and then negotiated the stairgate . His lunchtime nap now consists of a drive around the block to try and get him to have 30min sleep otherwise he is hanging by 4pm. We have to stay with him at night until he goes to sleep and then he wakes in the middle of the night and stays awake for approx 2hrs. DH & I are averaging 4-6hrs sleep a night and with baby no.2 due in 8weeks we are getting very worried about how we're going to cope. DS is 2yr4mth and is your typical terrible two

Has anyone else experienced this and if so what were your coping strategies. DS was a Gina Ford baby, excellent routine but suddenly decided to take himself out of the routine.

OP posts:

carwillin · 02/05/2006 08:50

Do you live in our house?

Can't offer any advice as we are going through the same thing. At present we are co-sleeping with our 21mo ds just so we get some sleep I don't want to start life with a new baby in 6 weeks time already running on empty.

We are probably making the problem worse at the moment but once baby is sleeping through we can hopefully deal with it more effectively.

Will be watching the thread with interest.

Original poster

wellsie · 03/05/2006 19:41

We are seriously considering co-sleeping just so that we get some rest, although DH (and me if I'm honest) are resisting at this moment in time. The last 2 nights he has slept until 6am ish so that's great but just know that it's only a matter of time before he starts his wanderings again.
Have visions of DS being distraught when he see's mummy BF new baby in bed and then being sent back to bed. What can we do, what did you do? Please advise.

OP posts:

SenoraPostrophe · 03/05/2006 20:02

oh wellsie. I rmember dd going through a phase of waking up in the night when I was preg with ds. I think I was more exhausted then than I ever was with a baby!

anyway - my ds is now 2.4 like yours, I am also pregnant again and he is also going through a doesn't want a nap phase (but he still needs one). he isn't doing so now, but he has also been through phases of waking in the night. we dealt with it (and you may not like this) by getting tough and leaving him to cry. we've had to do that on 3 or 4 occasions in total but he gets back into his old pattern pretty quickly afterwards. I find it works better if dh goes into the room, tells him to go back to sleep and then leaves (if I do it he cries harder). neither of us do the gf going back in after 10 mins thing because it makes him worse.

as for the daytime naps - the easiest way to get ds to sleep now is for me to lie down with him and sleep myself (or pretend to). it also helps if you time it exactly right: for ds it's 2.30pm on a normal day, or 1.30 if he got up early. Any later and he's gone past the really tired stage and won't sleep.
he needs to sleep for 1.5 hours, maybe a bit more, or is a monster later.

so anyway dunno if any of that helps. if not you still have my sympathy!

SenoraPostrophe · 03/05/2006 20:03

ps how imminent is the new baby?

Original poster

wellsie · 03/05/2006 20:14

Due 26th June.
I wish we could just leave him to cry in his room, trouble is he can get out of his room as stairgate is just an obstacle for him to climb over. We've tried everything you can think of in terms of getting him to stay put. The only thing we haven't tried is a lock on his door which I really don't want to do, although I know some Mum's swear by this.
We just seem to be stuck, no solution and sleep becoming less and less.

OP posts:

SenoraPostrophe · 03/05/2006 20:20

ah - now ds is still in a cot. one of the best pieces of advice I ever had on mn was "keep them in a cot for as long as possible"

In your position I would seriously consider the lock. not a bolt type lock, but some kind of bit of metal which would wedge the door ajar (we used to have such a thing to keep the cat out - it was a hook and eye type affair above the reach of small hands).

lternatively, hav you tried just repeatedly putting him back in bed without talking or looking at him? it would be exhausting for you (well, for your dh - you are preg after all)but he should get the message within a night or two.

SenoraPostrophe · 03/05/2006 20:22

also is he waking in the middle of the night or just really early? would thicker curtains help?

8 weeks is a long time - hopefully he'll be sleeping well when the baby comes. Mine's due end of aug and I plan for ds to sleep in the same room as dh, and me and baby to sleep in ds's room for the first few weeks just in case.

Original poster

wellsie · 03/05/2006 20:32

Waking anytime from 12 onwards. DS climbed out of his cot so that was the first problem. We've fitted a black out blind plus curtains, we've tried the putting back to bed, we've tried the "mummy loves you, now go to sleep" We've tried the "GET BACK TO BED!" and we've tried the "IF YOU GET OUT OF BED AGAIN YOU'LL GET A SMACK!" which we carried out and this worked for a couple of nights and then he couldn't careless We also tried the rope trick (tying one piece of rope to his door and then the end to another door) was the worst thing as he nearly pulled the door handle off and he was seriously distressed, worse than any controlled crying we ever did. DH tried staying with him until he went back to sleep but after 45mins DS then wanted to have a chat so this didn't work either.

OP posts:

SenoraPostrophe · 03/05/2006 20:39

ouch.

nb anything that makes him cry is likely to be worse than any controlled crying because he's that bit older and louder now. but that does sound horrific.

I think possibly you're trying too many things then. you need to choose one and stick to it. it may take a few nights, and may recurr, but it is worth a last try for a couple of weeks I think. i personally would choose the putting back to bed one, but you might like one of the others.

failing that...can you sleep in the day? like I say, my ds goes down for his nap fairly easily if I sleep with him.

Original poster

wellsie · 03/05/2006 20:50

He'll only sleep in the car now and if I let him have any longer than 30mins he won't go to bed at night, well he will, just not before 10pm! We are stuck in a vicious circle. With all the methods I have mentioned except the smacking and rope trick we have tried them over a period of time. Unfortunately this sleep problem has been in existance since December so it's been a rough few months.

OP posts:

SenoraPostrophe · 03/05/2006 20:59

well maybe he is nearly due to drop the nap. have you tried just lying down with him in a dark room for 5 mins at nap time (and not sleeping)? used to find that stopped dd from getting overtired when she was at that stage.

hope you get some sleep soon!

spinamum · 03/05/2006 21:48

we're co-sleeping with a 2.5yr old and a six week pregnancy. DS dosn't know about baby in mummys' , well, pelvis at moment. I'm shattered cos of pg.

I can offer no advice. Preg head and sleep depravation have sucked out the last few brain calls i had.

You have my sympathy and love though.

zzzzzzzzzzzz

burstingbug · 07/05/2006 22:48

Thought I'd add myself to this thread,
I'm 27 weeks prg, due 10th Aug with a 14.5 month ds already.
DS needs to be 'helped' to sleep still, either by cuddles and/or back patting. For about 3 months now he's woken up everynight at and can take anything from 5 mins to over an hour to get to sleep. I'm hoping he'll go back to sleeping 11 hrs again before next baby is due.
Any advice would be useful.

Flip