Can someone help with 20mo nap time?

[sleepcrisis]

Wondering if anyone has any ideas on how to make our routine a bit more successful.

We are going through sleep turmoil at the moment as have recently moved to new area and house.

Prior to this, DS slept 12-130is, and then from 7-7pm, and had done for about 3 months.

Now he is sleeping badly at night and waking earlier, and I just can't seem to keep him awake in the morning. Today we went to a group and he almost dozed off at 9am in the car - some bad singing from me managed to keep him awake, just. Then he fell asleep on the way home at 11.30 and have transferred him to his cot. But he hasn't had lunch - and so will wake hungry and grumpy and it's difficult to get him to eat when he's like that.

The other day we managed to stretch him to 1pm, like most kids his age, and he slept til 2.15 - But having woken that little bit later in the afternoon and there was no way in hell he was going to sleep at 7pm! He ended up mucking about in his cot (we have to sit with him at bedtime) for nearly an hour before sleeping at 8pm and then waking for the day at 5am. Ugh. Just not enough sleep.

So does he just prefer a morning nap? Should I be trying to stretch him out? And really, would a 1.15hr nap at 1pm affect bedtime that much? Most toddlers I know sleep 1-3pm and still go down at 7pm. Bedtimes here are so hard here at the best of times...

As it is we are having to do lunch at 11-11.30 and as a result we are missing all AM activities... and all little friends are sleeping in the afternoon after he wakes!

DD is the same age but her sleep has always been a bit haywire. Recently she's taken to getting sleepy in the morning so some days she has two naps. I think it's a combination of teething and being ill meaning she's not sleeping well at night. Her second nap is late afternoon, which means she isn't in bed till say 8:30 or 9, but I'd rather that than have to cope with a tired screaming toddler. If she has one nap it's normally after an early lunch, there's no way she'd make it through to 1pm without sleep. Many of DD's friends also have their (one) nap around 11 or 12, as 2pm seems to be a popular meeting time here.

As for not eating when she wakes, I sometimes give her something easy (a biscuit or fruit) straight on waking that'll take the edge off the grumpiness before trying to give her lunch.