2.5 DD waking after 90 mins EVERY NIGHT

[Whatsounddoesagiraffemake]

Background: she's never been a good sleeper and goes through (upsettingly short) phases of being able to fall asleep by herself and stay asleep. DS born 2 months ago.

Since returning from various family visits over Christmas DD has refused to go to sleep by herself although we've now managed to get her off whilst simply sitting in her room rather than lying in her bed or holding her hand which she insisted on for a while. Once asleep she wakes up EXACTLY 90 mins after going to sleep EVERY night. She'll then sleep really lightly, waking every 20 mins or so and not going back until one of us sits in her room again. By about 1am we're shattered and the baby is beginning to stir so she ends up in our bed where she'll sleep like a dream until 7.30.

All efforts to let her cry (which we hate doing anyway) have failed after her ability to cry solidly for 3 hours wore us down and didn't help her sleep any better (not surprisingly!). She naps for 45 mins a day although whether she naps or not makes no difference and neither does how much activity she's done. We've asked her if she's cold or scared and she now has more blankets and a nightlight. Again, neither have made a difference!

Please help us stop this happening. Her lack of sleep is making her behaviour during the day a complete nightmare and my lack of sleep is really not helping me deal with it effectively. Both of us seem to spend the day shouting! And don't get me started on what spending no time at all alone with DH is doing to our marriage!
TIA!

I really don't feel qualified to give advice as it sounds similar to what I'm going through. The only thing I would say is she probably needs more than a 45min nap in a day so maybe she can't get to sleep as she is overtired. Maybe worth a try xx

Sympathies giraffe, I'm going through similar with my 3yo DS2. He's gone from being a very reliable sleeper to a total nightmare, since autumn when he had a bad cough and then chicken pox, both of which made it really hard for him to sleep, and I often ended up in the spare room with him.

Now he wakes up regularly throughout the night and just gets up himself and comes into our room. Sometimes I can successfully take him back to bed, sit with him for a few minutes and he'll go off (but invariably wakes up again a couple of hours later). Other times he is more awake and insists he can't sleep and needs to be in a bed with me. Having him in our bed doesn't work because he feels too hot and constricted, so kicks the duvet off us and pushes us all the time with hands/feet, or else keeps moving to the bottom of the bed and back. But I'm getting very depressed about sleeping in the spare room with him. I feel cold in there and don't like not waking up with my DH.

Smudging, I'm really interested in your story. I think it must be really hard carrying through the first nights of the new system. The temptation to cave in must be immense when you aren't getting any sleep that night. But also, I don't want to end up like your sister and fear we may be going that way.

I'm also wondering if anyone knows whether doctors ever give children something short term to help them sleep, so as to 'reset the sleep clock' as it were. I would kill for a few days of unbroken nights' sleep.