Suddenly anxious 1 year old cries whenever I leave - help!

[Ljs2403]

My little guy's just turned one and up to now has been a great sleeper - 7pm straight through to 7am every night, plus two good hour-long naps during the day. However, for the past couple of weeks he's really fought sleep both in the day and at night - keeps standing up in his cot (where he used to just lie quietly), and begins to cry immediately if I leave his room. Have tried tough love and leaving him but he just makes himself sick with the crying...

Plus, he's now waking during the night and doing the same thing. Then he's sleeping later in the morning and his routine's out for the day...

Have ended up taking him into bed with me at 4am-ish for the past couple of nights just to get some sleep but REALLY don't want to get into that habit.

Any suggestions???? Am confounded at the sudden change and want my happy sleeper back!

Whats he like when you leave the room in the day? It could either be separation anxiety, or that he is getting too much sleep - what would happen if you cut back to one nap?

Are you me?! I could have started the exact same thread about a week ago.

DD has just turned 1 and, after previously being more or less a perfect sleeper, about a month ago she started resisting bedtime and waking in the night. It just got worse and worse... Whenever I walked out of her room she would scream, grab the bars of her cot and refuse to sleep. Killed me. Eventually I realised I was the problem. Cuddling to sleep, bad sleep associations, etc plus her getting a bit clingy towards me of late. About 4 nights ago DH took over bedtime duties. It turns out he's tougher than I am and put her back down when she screamed, patted, shushed and resisted picking her up and cuddling her to sleep. She's now settling within minutes and more or less sleeping through. Touch bloody wood!
Do you have a DP or anyone else about who can try putting him to bed instead of you? I think DD was relying on me too much to get her to sleep and forgot that she can manage it herself. Good luck!

I'm not full of much advice but the one thing I would say is if the waking time is getting later because of getting up in the night you need to stop this by waking up at a set time everyday regardless - say 7 and stick to it. So everyday begins and ends at the same time, even if the last wake up was 5.30/6 and you're shattered set the alarm for 7 and begin as morning.

Consistency and routine are key!

Same with bringing dc into bed. If you don't want them to co sleep don't ever bring them in your bed, ever. I know people disagree but honestly of course they want to be in your bed. If they know at some point you will crack and co sleep during the night they will keep waking hoping that's the one time you will bring them into bed.

Always resettle into their own bed no matter how tired you are!

Hi nextphase - thanks for this. I think he's close to dropping his morning nap but after 2.5 hours awake he's practically asleep on the carpet! He was the same when he dropped his afternoon nap when he was really little, it took around a month before he dropped it consistently. He's off to nursery in 6 weeks' time so am hoping that a new daytime sleep routine can be reinforced there.

Hi elbett - haha, am glad I'm not alone! Just weird how it's started so suddenly. Good advice to get my other half to step in. I usually put BB to bed and it's usually (or was!) a story and a kiss goodnight. Perhaps some tough love is needed... Little guy is with me every day as he's not off to nursery until mid Feb, and he does follow me round the house so there's def some separation anxiety lurking in there.

Wish me luck...!

Hi Fairylea, thanks for this. Up till the Christmas hols I've been pretty consistent with wake up times, but the shock of sleepless nights and my other half on hols has meant it's slipped. Starting nursery in 6 weeks' time so will have to be setting alarms again... He's just been so easy to this point (and yes, I know how lucky I am!) that it's been a real shock to hit a wall on this. Will be trying some tough love...