When did you have 2nd dc?

[Madallie]

Did you wait until dc1 was a 'good' sleeper or just go for it even if they weren't and dealt with it anyway?

Just wondering?

Thanks

Interested in this as my sleep refuser has put me off having another.

People assure me I'll change my mine once I'm less sleep deprived but at this rate I'll be too old by the time he's finally sleeping!

Hi seriously. HOw old is your LO?

It'll be interesting to hear what those with more than 1dc say!

When DC1 was 14 months I got pregnant with DC2. We decided enough was enough and got on with sleep training when I was newly pregnant as I wasn't going to spend the next 9 months exhausted and up all night. Worked well, DC1 is a great sleeper now.

Honestly, my ds was 4 and at school when he slept a whole night through. prior to that it was torture, utter utter torture, he just did not sleep.

So, we felt ready to start for dc 2 when he was about 5 as he was hard work in lots of other ways too other than the sleep.

There is no way on Gods green earth i even considered another child, i was SO exhausted, stressed and struggled so much to cope with him.

He is now 9, a pleasure, an absolutely lovely boy who loves sleep, and dc2 is going to be here in 3 weeks. (Infertility/mc issues)

He's 9 months mad

I'm also utterly exhausted & not really enjoying the sleep deprivation side of things.

nana this is my fear, that it won't improve. If I wait until he goes to school I will be over forty...

What sleep training did you do at 14 months?

How old is your first OP?

I have two - 3.5 and 18 months. Lots of my mum friends are also on number two. Generally I would say that those who went for a small gap had good sleepers - gaps of 18 months and under. Those who have a 2-3 year gap seemed to go for it regardless of whether they had bad or poor sleepers. I think there comes a point where your desires regarding your family long term (how many kids you want, the age gap you would like to have, career, your own age, etc) override the sleep issue for a lot of people.

Then there is a whole other bracket of people who either stop at one or have much bigger gaps because of their first (rather than because they always wanted one, or infertility or whatever). In my (very unscientific experience I admit) experience, that tends to be a child who is very challenging overall rather than sleep alone.

We decided DC2 would be a good idea a week after DD started sleeping through at 14mo

Am now on first night of sleep training for DS aged 9mo...

I tried straight away for DD2 as DD1 was hard to conceive, DD1 was less than 12mo when DD2 arrived! It worked fine, I never considered the "sleeping" element tbh. Then DS arrived 12months after DD2 (not planned at all) so 3DCs in 3 years, DS is now 2yo and bit of a problem to fall asleep but DC4 due in March (fell pregnant on the coil so Faaaaar from planned ) so we'll have to adjust and manage!

Started ttc#2 when DS was 2ish. His first 4 months were hellish but he was a dream sleeper from 7.5months.

DD is 13months and a horrific sleeper. I am NOT having a third DC

Hmm i am 42 and expecting dc2.

I tried probably everything you have tried. I read books, spoke to other mums, spoke to health visitor friend, GP, and tried all things for prolonged periods.
CC for a month, ignoring, routine was strict to the minute for the whole 5 years that he didnt sleep.

Did try later bedtime, but without fail, he would wake 10-12 14 times a night and be up for the day between 4am-5 am every single day.

If the clocks went back/forward it was worse, summer-getting light early was worse.
He had colic, then croup which meant entire nights of no sleep at all as the croup was much worse at night.

I also worked night shifts at that time, so would be up all night, then all day then went to work. DH claims he woke maybe 3-4 times a night for him during my night shifts, but still would be up with the larks for him.

Horrendous torture together with a very boystrous, inquisitive and hyper child in the day, i couldnt take my eyes off him, couldnt leave him alone in a room till he was 6-7 as he would reak havock, distructive and into everything.

No, i did want a couple of children, but my ds put me off any more, also could never understand why any one else would want to put themselves through it!
Of course everyone elses kid slept throught he night, behaved lovely and were angels compared.

So i have placed an order for dc2 to be a sleeper, calm, laid back little thing.....wish me luck Kinda know what to do if it isnt though, prepared and willing.

Rememebr gripping onto the worktop in the kitchen feeling sick with utter exhaustion, the room spinning, wishing i could just lie down on the kitchen floor for 5 minutes to sleep, hearing him scream his head off upstairs, having just watched the advert for NSPC advert with "myles knows nobody will come if he cries or not" with that tot in his cot with a dirty vest and empty bottle feeling like the biggest twatiest mother ever to have walked the earth.

That was CC for me....

OOh i did sob, sobbed my heart out that night. Dark dark days/nights.

Ds was 11 months when we first TTC dc2. He wasn't sleeping through (he was an awful sleeper) but I had a MC. Finally had dd when he was 2.2. He was much better by then - we night weaned and his intolerances calmed down.

We went for a second despite ds being terrible at sleeping because we knew if we waited until he slept through then we'd never do it as we'd be used to sleep again. And we thought we'd be able to handle a poor sleeper again as couldn't possible get worse.

We were wrong. Dd is a worse sleeper (at night) but much better at napping. Once we got past the newborn stage of sleeping whenever she took a month or so to settle into a routine and was in her cot quicker. But I coslept from day one, she lived in the sling until 12-16 weeks so I could cope. However she's 13 months and has never done 12 hours whereas ds had by now.

The first 6 months nearly killed me but the home stretch is on the horizon.

Never again though.

I have a 14 month age gap between DCs. DS1 was a good sleeper ar 5/6 months but stopped around 9 months till 2.5. I had the attitude that it better to condense the baby years and have a few terrible/sleep deprived years than have a big age gap. I am expecting dc3 so will have 3 under 4 but I know if my 2nd had got to 3.5 or older I would have been able to face the baby stage again. But I know people who think I am mad! It depends what u and dh/dp prefer. Each age go has pros and cons.