11.5mo sleep changing again

[Madallie]

I am not moaning about my dd's (11.5mo) sleep at all, just after bit of advise from those more experienced/wiser etc than me.

I know they change so quickly and my dd is no exception. She was never a great sleep but has got so so much better. We've had some problems over the past few months again but I thought I had it a few weeks ago - now not so sure.

Anyone, routine that was working for few weeks was:

6.30am - wake
9.50am - nap (asleep by 10 and I now wake her at 11am)

I wake at 11am otherwise it was getting until after 3.3 for pm nap

2.15/30pm - nap (falls asleep 15-20 in usually, just chats away a bit first) I let her sleep for about 1hts 15 sometimes I wake her sometimes she wakes herself.

I always wake her by 4.15pm, usually by 4pm though.

7/7.15 - bed
(I allow 3hrs 15mins last awake. This, for last little while has been all she could handle)

However last few nights she's taken 30-45mins to settle, not crying at all but banging her head up and down on matresss. I've of course gone up throughout to soothe her.

Anyone know what I should do?
Too short awake time between pm nap and bed? Are he naps long enough?
Should I maybe make am nap 45mins, hope she goes down a bit quicker for pm nap and then give her longer pm awake time?

Was thinking:

6.30am - wake
10-10.45 - nap
2.15-3.30 - nap
7.00 or 7.15 - bed

Again I know not a big issue, although have had lots of those, its just as a first time mum I'm not really sure where to go from here.

Not sure if she's tranisitioning to 1 nap. Although a bit early I've heard.

Thanks for reading

Just to add, when she takes ages to fall asleep at night she has much more restless sleep/wakes in night etc.

Just wanted to update, in case anyone does read this.

Today has been

6.40- wake
9.50 - nap - slept 10.10-10.55 -
I woke after 45mins to try and get slightly earlier pm nap.

Didn't work. She slept 15-20mins less even though she had 20mins less in am!
2.00 - put down for nap 2. slept 2.45-3.45 (woke herself)

Now not sure what time to do BT or what to do tomorrow.

Any ideas gratefully recieved.

Thanks

My daughter is 1 yr (and 3 days!) and her day is a bit like this:
6:30- awake
8:45/9- nap 45 mins
12:30- nap 1.5-2hrs
6:30- bed
Does that help at all?

Thank you for replying.

You're routine looks lovely, Im envious!

I thik.nk the problem here is that she is just not falling asleep well anymore. I've tried later and earlier for naps and bedtime but doesn't seem to work.

Doesn't seem to matter what time she goes down she just takes a long while to go off. She used to take 10-15mins max.

Maybe it's another sleep regression, Who knows? Guess i'll just ride it out another week or so before I make changes, just in case. It's just today she only got 1hr 45naps in total and is still awake up there now.

Oh well! We'll see how nest few days go.

Thanks again though.

Have you tried 2,3,4?
First nap 2 hours after waking
Second nap 3 hours after waking from nap
Bedtime 4 hours after waking from second nap

DS is almost 11 months. Works well for him :)

Thanks MCM. I haven't tried that because she hasn't gone down 2hors after gettiing up in the morning for months now. She just stopped falling asleep so I pushed it later bit bit until is was woking for her again.

Now she goes down for that sleep the best - within 15mins but is taking and longer to fall asleep at pm nap and BT.

Maybe it's just something I have to ride out, another phase?! I just guess I have always really worried about OT and bacause for a little while now she has been going to sleep well I just assumed she obviously wasn't tired.

I guess there can always be loads of reasons they fight/don't want to go to sleep! She has become way more vocal now, startied saying hello, and crawling a few paces (she's quite a late crawler and is even trying to push up on hand and feet to stand). Maybe her brain's too busy to switch off and slep right now!

Dd is 1 in a couple of weeks. Her routine is down to just one big nap as she started waking at 5am so we tried dropping it and it worked. Although now she is waking in the night with teething

But usually it's
6.30-7 wake up
1 pm nap
7.15 bed

Have you tried bringing her am nap forward slightly and then bringing her pm to just after lunch? I alway find that if she doesn't have a morning nap then she gets so overtired and doesn't get what she needs sleepwise in the afternoon. Also, the crawling thing scuppers the best laid plans (I was up twice a night for 10 days putting a small person back in bed when she first learnt!). You are not alone by any means!

That sounds good Untamed - not the NW though!

I wouldn't mind a routine like that either. Do you know, it's not even that I want/need her to sleep a certain amount. It's just I don't know why in the space of 2-3 days she's cut her naps by about half an hour and night time sleep by up to an hour.

I know people may say she's OT but her wake times don't seem long to me.

1st wake time - about 3hrs 15mins but this has been this way for ages and she's gone down just fine
2nd wake time - I was putting down after 3hrs, moved to 3hrs 15 when she started taking a while to fall asleep
3rd wake time - 3hrs 15 - again was going down fine but shanged to 3hrs 30mins when took ages to settle.

I know longer wake times, especially 2nd wake time might be reccommended but she only really naps a max of 1hr 15 in the afternoon so 4 hr wake time might be quite a lot and a very big jump from the 3hrs 15mins she was having a few days ago.

Sorry for rambling. I'm just confused and feel bad that I don't know what to do for the best for her. Feel like i'm just not getting it right.

Thanks again for reading

Thanks minicc, good advise.

Do you think I should maybe just persevere with earlier am nap even though she's been having at least 3hr 15mins wake time for quite a few months. That's really why I cut it down from 1hr 15 or so to 45mins so hopefully pm nap would happen a little later and for a little longer.

Mabe I will try this tomorrow-

6.30am - wake
9.30/45 - 10.15 - nap
1.30 - when she wakes (hopefully 3ish)
7pm - bed
This would give the four hours she seems to need before bed atm.

Good to know I'm not alone!

Its a tricky time this transition. I remember with my DS if he took a long morning nap he'd point blank refuse an afternoon nap but be so horrendously overtired by bedtime he'd wake up no end of times in the night. I also found giving a short morning nap & a longer nap just after lunch the best way to get through this stage, once your dd starts to outright refuse a morning nap then you know she is ready to drop to just 1 nap.

In the mean time, when you cut morning nap shorter, your best bet is to also shorten the amount of time she is awake before her afternoon nap. Up til now she's done a 1hr nap followed by 3hrs 15 awake, so if you cut the nap to 30/45mins, keeping her awake for 3h 15 is likely to be a bit too much for her to handle & she will get OT. I think this is why her PM nap was shorter (just 1hr) the other day. By shortening the morning nap AND the following awake time, this will bring the afternoon nap earlier, and therefore give her a longer afternoon.

At her age I'd probably aim for 2.5hrs after a 30min nap, 2.75hrs maybe 3hrs max after a 45min nap. So aim for more like

Up: 6.30am
Nap: 9.30/45-10.15
Nap: 12.45/1-2.30/3
Bed: 7pm

If you do manage to get her afternoon nap brought a little earlier, I'd let her sleep longer than 1h 15 at this nap, ultimately this is the nap that will stay & so its the one you want to encourage to be nice & long. A longer nap will also help sustain her through the 4hrs awake time to bedtime.

HTH.x

DD has 1.5-2 hours sleep in the day. And is on the go all the rest of the time. < exhausted>
Good luck

Thanks so much Omama. I am really grateful you replied. You always have such good advise and I just always feel I'm 'doing something wrong'!

It definitely is a difficult time.

Think I will try what you suggested above and yes, definitely if she falls asleep earlier in pm I will let her sleep longer until 3pm. I only started cutting it so she wask awake by 4pm so she would not have a late bedtime.

Tomoorow we have friends vivisting so don't wsnt to strta anything new. I then work thurs and fridays and my mum looks after dd so am going to start at the weekend to make changes.

I will do:
6.30 - wake
9.45-10.30 -nap
1.30 - let her sleep until she wakes (I would probably get her up by 3.30pm is she didn't wake but doubt that will happen.
7.00pm bed (6.30/45pm if pm nap is short though)

Just a couple of questions if you don't mind.

If she takes a while to fall asleep at 9.45, would you get her up at 10.30am anyway or let her sleep th 45mins regardless?

If she only sleeps an hour or so in pm, how would you continue the rest of the day?

Also would you keep going with this sort of routine for a week or 2 even if it doesn't seem to be working, so as to give her time to adjust?

Thanks again so much. I really appreciate the time you spent to read and reply.
x

Thanks Untamed. You must be tired!
x

To answer your Q's:

Yes I probably would get her up at 10.30 to keep the rest of the day on track, unless this meant the nap would only be 20mins or less, in which case I'd probably allow 30mins. BUT I'd ensure the awake time before the next nap was a wee bit shorter, around 2.5hrs

If she only sleeps an hour in the PM, no choice but to carry on with the day & do a slightly earlier BT - I see you've already planned for that in your routine so that's fine!

Yes I would try the routine for a good couple of weeks to give her time to get used to it. I find with my DS it always takes at least that for him to adjust.

Good luck!xxx

Thank you again Omama. Will try this for a few weeks.

Fingers crossed!
xx