This isn't CIO.... Is it?!!!

[blushingmare]

My 15 week dd finds it extremely hard to self settle - she just can't do it, which I know is not uncommon at this age. Up until very recently I have been feeding her to sleep or rocking her to sleep in my arms and then doing the very delicate transfer to her crib. But in the past ten days or so she has started waking up as soon as her head hits the crib mattress - no matter how deeply she was sleeping on me. So now I have started putting her down whilst sleepy but awake - I kneel by the crib rocking it, whilst stroking her head with one hand and my other hand resting on her chest and sssh her or sing softly to her until she goes to sleep. If we're lucky she'll do some tired grizzlies and then fall asleep, but more often than not she will properly cry before going into the grizzling stage. I really try not to pick her up at this point (really hard and I have to close my wyes so I cant see her little face ) because I know it will just start again when I put her back down again, thus delaying the falling asleep stage. But if she's got herself really upset then I will pick her up to calm her and start the process again.

Anyway, when I described what I was doing to a friend today, she said "oh right, so you let her cry it out". I was like, "er... no", but then thought goodness, I hope this isn't CIO!

It's not is it?!

Slightly differant tack but just a thought...it's got quite chilly in the last 10 days so have you tried warming the sheet with a hot water bottle before puttng her down. It might be hitting a cold bed that's waking her. We had the same problem starting about a week or so ago and started putting her down on a warm blanket rather then straight on the sheet and this has really helped. But then our apartment gets really, really cold so it might not be a problem for you.

Oh, and I wouldn't class that as CIO at all and I am a big softy who can't bare to allow dd to cry at all without picking her up. You are with her all the time comforting her not just leaving her cry on her own.

So you put her down on her back? My DD liked to go on her side from about this age. She would always wake up if I put her down on her back but not if I lay her on her side.

No advice on self soothing though I'm not sure why it bothers you? I still feed my 12 month old to sleep every night, we both enjoy it, no tears, no fuss.

Hi,

It doesn't sound like CIO. I know it's frustrating but hang in there. I have the same thing with DS with his daytime naps. I rock him to a sleepy state and then put him down.

Sometimes it works, sometimes he wakes up when I put him down and either starts kicking joyfully as if not tired or grizzles. Either way, I pick him up as the whole ssshing thing while stroking never really worked. If i have to do this 3 times I just let him sleep on me as I would rather he get the sleep by that point.

I used to get really stressed out about it but now I think that as long as he sleeps ok at night, I don't mind about the day so much and I will just enjoy cuddling him while I can.

For me, the main thing is that he associates going to sleep with being happy and relaxed, rather than stressed.

At fifteen weeks you are going through a Wonder Week fussy period too. I could not put mine down for a nap at all at that stage.

No, that's not cry it out - you're always there stroking her and singing to her.

I second the suggestion of warming the sheet - we did all sorts of things like that when DD was tiny. DH even took the matress out of the crib and laid on it!

Yes yes to warming the sheets

llamallama - it bothers me because she cries! Feeding to sleep isn't working anymore because she wakes up as soon as I put her down, which she wasn't doing before. Thanks though- I've tried her on her side and she still wakes.

Thanks for the warming sheets suggestion - great idea and definitely worth a go