Please tell me how and when your dc started self settling if you didn't use CIO

[mumtocuddlebundle]

Hoping to start a thread where we can get a few tips on how other people did this.
I can first share what worked for ds1 with us. At 4 months I started putting him in cot a couple of hours after last nap. And he just miraculously started to fall asleep at bedtime, after a while this also worked at nap time too. I just had to catch the right moment. If he cried I would sometimes rock him or whatever he needed then try again the next day. Over time he figured it out. When he learned to roll onto his tummy I had to keep turning him onto his back occasionally and sometimes I had to lean into cot and hold down his arms and sort of cuddle and shush him to hold him still. This seemed to calm him and stop him rolling over. He would fall asleep as I cuddled him.

My plan had been to do something similar with ds2 but he started rolling to his tummy at 2 months old, so my plans were scuppered! As soon as i put him down he flips onto his tummy. Then struggles and gets annoyed. I have tried my cuddling technique but it didn't work. He's now 6 months. I either feed or rock him to sleep, which is very easy. But I am wondering if I should try some gentle persuasion to fall asleep in cot. Just not sure where to start. Or maybe just worry about it later when rocking no longer works.

Sorry that's been a bit long. I hope my description of what worked with ds1 might help some others.

I'll probably get flamed for this but I'd let him sleep on his tummy!

I didn't mind him sleeping in his tummy, it was just that once on his tummy he couldn't fall asleep, cos he'd be struggling getting annoyed, trying to figure out how to crawl etc. Whereas on his back he relaxed and went to sleep

Oh OK.

DS2 is a dream settler, I have always just put him down and he drifts off when he is ready. He has been known to sing and shout for up to an hour before actually sleeping but I have never let him get distressed. I have never and will never CIO.

DS1 was another matter altogether but thankfully that was 12 years ago and I can't really remember the nightmare!

5.5 months via not-very-gradual withdrawal (ie it worked pretty quickly - sat next to her no iteraction, cried for just 7 mins first night). Naps, still sit with my hand on her at 18months, though apparently she makes no fuss at all at nursery...

oooh, I'm very interested in this thread - sorry I've got nothing to add, our 9mo ds still sleeps with us and hates being put in the cot even for naps.

We'd like to start getting him to sleep in his cat but as we've just moved house we really don't want to piss the new neighbours off with CIO, but he's trying to wriggle out of the bed when he wakes up and we're terrified he's going to fall out of the bed and he keeps kicking us in the face

cat? cot

At 5 months I stopped feeding to sleep (DP rocked/cuddled instead)
Then started trying to put him to bed sleepy but awake - did some ssh-patting
By 7 months he was self-settling without tears at nursery, though I did usually ssh-pat a bit at home
At 8 months I had to do pick-up/put-down as he started to pull to standing in his cot
Since 9 months he has gone into his cot awake at every nap and bed time and self-settled without a murmur.

I did controlled crying (not cio) with both of mine when they were about 10 months old.

For naps, at 3-4 months old using sssh/pat. Until then all his naps were on me. Bedtimes have thankfully never ever been a problem, put down awake & he self settled, tiny bit of sssh/pat when he was very young but that was it.

Thanks for the replies. Interesting to hear the various methods. Most people seem to have started teaching to self settle fairly young. I thought there might have been some responses which fed to sleep til 18 months maybe, then started cuddling instead etc. Perhaps this is unusual.