I hated it too. I felt that it just taught DD to become more hysterical when she was put down for a sleep.
However, what worked for us was the breaking the feed to sleep cycle. I only truly managed this when I stopped BFing tbh but I could have done it before. I spent 3 nights doing each "step" and it worked a treat. Yes she cried but I was there the whole time and she cried because she wanted to sleep and wanted to be fed to sleep.
-Put DD on lap, jiggle leg (she went to sleep well with movement), and rhythmically patting chest. Repeat "shhhhhh" and (when she got more upset) "I'm here" in a soft, soothing voice. Continue until asleep. Continue if she wakes up in the night.
-The same as above but no leg jiggle (so the movement didn't rock her to sleep).
-In cot, patting chest, repeat "shhhh" & "I'm here." Do not remove from cot. She will be cross but she is ok. If she was really upset I would get in the cot with her but I found this just prolonged it all.
-As above but just hand on chest (not patting) and repeat shh and I'm here.
-As above but NO hand on chest. Just shhh and I'm here.
-As above but only saying something if she got upset.
I haven't progressed past this tbh so she still goes to sleep with me in the room but that is for a great number of reasons.
I know it all sounds terribly long winded but it worked. DD was never left alone, I was there the whole time and I was touching her for most of it. I didn't feel like a bitch or like I was failing her.
I usually knew it was time for the next step (though 3 days seemed to be the rule) when she started to wake up again more in the night. In other words she became used to me patting her or saying shhh or whatever. I also got a white noise app to replace me saying shhhh when I thought I would kill myself if I said shhhh one more time.