DS is 10 months (today!). He's never been a good sleeper. A good night is me only getting up twice.
He goes through "good" and bad patches but there is no general improvement and teething isn't helping. His sleeping started to get better when I started co-sleeping with him for part of the night (i.e. when I was fed up of getting up, I'd bunk down on a mattress in his room with him) and more importantly for me, I was getting more sleep.
But now, even co-sleeping doesn't seem to be working. Last night was awful. He woke up at 10.50pm and despite me bringing him into bed with me and breastfeeding him and giving him calpol and baby bonjela he just couldn't sleep. He'd drop off but less than a minute later be rolling around crying. We also tried the pushchair (always works for naps) but that didn't work.
Eventually after two and a half hours DH left DS in his cot to cry (in the country we live in CIO is the standard sleep training and DH is frustrated that I refuse to do it). We left DS for 25 minutes, with me going in every 5 to shush and pat him but then I couldn't stand it anymore (DS was hysterical and standing in his cot every time I went in). I took him out of the cot and settled down on the mattress in his room and we both went to sleep (finally! having been awake for over 3 hours).
So. What to do? DH almost never helps at night, at first because I BF but now because DS gets hysterical if it's DH and not me who goes into him. Even if he's calm in my arms, if I pass him to DH so I can nip to the loo DS is really hysterical. I work full time but when I'm there DS wants me and only me - he's gotten very clingy in the last few weeks, hence why I started co-sleeping.
I've tried saying to DH that he ought to go in more often to DS as a solution to the hysterical crying but DH doesn't want to. Either I sort DS out or we leave him to cry. He thinks that him being there makes no difference. Also, everyone he knows has "left their baby to cry and their babies sleep through so why would it be any different for us?" 
I've tried the no-cry sleep solution and gradual withdrawal which didn't work. DS is not comforted unless in my arms/lying next to me and breastfeeding.
I don't enjoy co-sleeping so it's not a long-term solution. Breastfeeding whilst lying down makes me ache because of holding myself in one position and I don't sleep as deeply as DS rolls a lot and kicks me/headbutts me etc.
I don't know what I'm looking for here really, I'm just so tired and DH's only answer is CIO which I can't do.