Just a bit down in the dumps today...

[Bet01]

I've posted about DS's crap sleep loads of times in the past, and we've never done much about it except co-slept and bf through the night to get as much sleep as poss- but that's because DP and I thought at some point it was bound to get better.
BUT: DS is 17 months old now. It hasn't got better. In fact sometimes it's worse. I do appreciate he's teething, he's had a cold, developmental leaps, etc etc, but I'm so tired this morning I could cry.
He went to sleep on the boob at 7pm, woke at 9pm for 30 mins, woke at 11pm for TWO HOURS and then slept until 6.30am. It's not enough sleep for him, why on earth wake up so early after such little sleep?
He fights sleep so much. His eyes will be rolling back in his head and he'll still be trying to stand up.
He sleeps in bed with me and DP because he wakes for boob so often.
I just want my bed back, and 7-ish straight hours sleep.
I'm going to have to leave him to cry aren't I?

Oh Bet, you have my sympathies. I have got my own thread in sleep about DS. One thing that is working for us is getting into a strict routine with his naps during the day. How well does he nap? And have you tried the no cry sleep solution? A lovely mnetter sent me a copy and I am working my way through it and it has some good tips.

Thanks Daisy. Funnily enough his naps have always been ok. He has about an hour on average (which probably isn't enough given his nighttime exploits) but its always at 11.30am. Any later and he gets even more overtired and wakes up after 20 mins.
I think I somehow need to break this cycle of over tiredness; if he could just have one massive 3 hour nap it might 're-set' him IYSWIM. His eyes are always so red, and he's always rubbing them. He's fairly happy though, thankfully.
I should probably read the Pantley book though, you're right. Just need to prop my eyes open first!

How long is his nap? I think he should be napping for two hours at that age. I also stopped co-sleeping as I felt that it was causing more sleep deprivation in the end and after a hellish couple of nights where DS screamed blue murder on and off all night, he now sleeps in his cot.

Often he will go down without crying, whereas before it was a real battle as I didn't understand his sleep cues. Good lucl.

His nap is normally an hour or just over. I don't think it is long enough really, but even though I'm lying next to him ready to boob him when he stirs, that's still the most he'll manage so not sure how to prolong it really.
I would LOVE him to not be in our bed. He wriggles, kicks, flips, and generally wakes us up all night with his shennanegans.
Did you just stick your DC in the cot and leave the room, or where you there with them? Two nights doesn't sound too bad considering the benefit. Maybe we should steel ourselves and give it a go...

If he won't nap longer, why don't you try an extra early bedtime for a few nights on the trot? Say, 6pm, if he'll settle that early? It might address some of the overtiredness which seems to be the problem (waking before midnight is a sign of OT).

Daisy I might try that, thanks. I really do think a lot of it is over tiredness; he wouldn't nap today (v.unusual) but he passed out from 3-5pm instead, and despite a bedtime of 7pm I've only just got him to sleep at 8.40pm. So I actually think he's one of those kids that doesn't need masses of sleep. A later nap shouldn't really have made much difference to bedtime given how little he slept last night, but it clearly did.
My plan for tomorrow is nap earlier (or die trying) and early bed at 6pm-ish, if he'll go that early.

No advice I'm afraid but just wanted to say I'm in the same boat with my 16mo dd. She's never slept well, not even as a newborn. I keep going with her in the belief she will improve in her own time but i have days where i feel utterly broken. My dp tried in the last week to keep dd in her cot but we gave up after one week as she was having periods of 3 plus hours awake and showed no signs of improving. I have read that many babies improve after the 18 month regression so fingers crossed that is the case with our LOs.

I used CC and CIO when I put him in the cot because I was desperate. He screamed on and off until it was morning which was awful as I just sat downstairs and cried. But I offered to feed him every couple of hours or so because I figured that he couldn't need bmilk again before then.

So he now sleeps in his cot but I go in to his room to feed him regularly throughout the night.

An hours nap is not enough as you know but have you tried either v.early to bed or getting him to nap three hours after he wakes from his first nap?

I feel the same. My 20 month old was a great sleeper and then turned bad and I keep thinking it will get better but it isn't. It's getting worse and it makes me depressed.

I have had a sleep consultant before and have just had another consultation with her. It does involve some leaving them to cry I am afraid. I think it's the only way - but you can go in and comfort them during the crying periods.

I will update you on how we go but we have had to get tough because it's starting to affect the rest of our lives.

Belly poor you. I've got a horrid feeling my DS will be the same. He's so strong-willed. During his 2-hour awakenings in the middle of the night, DP and I literally pretend to be asleep while he crawls about. But still 2 hours later he's pottering about, crying a bit, and just generally not asleep.
It's really starting to affect out lives, as you say. DP has to work, and he's also trying to find a new job. He thinks the reason he didn't get one the other day is he was so tired in the interview he couldn't think straight!
Daisy, I think I will end up having to let him CIO. It's awful but there are some nights when rocking him, feeding him and walking him about are having no effect and I just think 'do you know what, I could actually just stick him in his cot and leave him now...'
Emmy yes please do update me!