new sleep problems after hospital

[MIKEHUGHES]

Dear All

I hope you don't mind me joining as a male! I need some advice for my dear wife.

we recently had our second child, a girl. she is 7 weeks old now. she was up till hospital admission last week sleeping great. 4 hours after feeds at night. my wife was sleeping 6-7 hours a night, and i decided to stay in our bedroom moved out for 6 months with our first since he was ravenous!)

last week she was admitted to hospital with high temp. had loads of antibiotics, but it was viral. had 5 failed lumbar puncture attempts, before getting a sample. she was niggly throughout, and now at night won't settle in her moses basket. she will only sleep in our bed with my wife, and my wife is shattered since she cannot sleep since she is worried that she will squash her.

any advice? will her original sleep return. can we do anything to improve. she only wants to feed all the time, and sleep with wither one of us. obviously she is worried about being left alone now after her hospital experience.

thanking you in advance. :-)

I'm sorry you are going through this - I have no experience of your particular situation, but as the mum of a one-year-old who still wakes pretty often in the night I have complete sympathy for you all.

As you've said, it's been a pretty traumatic time for your 7-week old - that's a lot for such a tiny person to go through. The extra feeding, holding and comfort she is craving could be because right now she needs to feel safe and safe = with mum 24/7. But that's normal for all babies, I reckon. Be patient with her, and give her what she needs, and her sleep could revert to normal - but baby sleep changes so very often that it's hard to say, I'm afraid.

The only advice I have is what I would do myself and keep her close, maybe wear her in a sling during the day, give her what she needs, and this too shall pass.

If your wife is BF, she is very, very unlikely to squash your little one - someone else might have the specifics, but it's something ingrained in our biology that keeps BF mums in a type of sleep where we are aware of our babies and their position.

I'm sorry I don't have more for you, sleep deprivation is miserable. I hope your little one feels much better soon.

Sorry to hear your DD has been ill. My DS had two traumatic events one at 6 weeks, another at 11 weeks both requiring hospital treatment.

He went from being a pretty good sleeper (4 hourly in his cot) to only wanting to sleep on me both times. It was knackering as I couldn't co sleep with him either. It has passed & he took about a week to settle each time.

The last one coincided with a growth spurt though which meant it went on for longer 10 days or so. I was totally wrecked by the end of it!

Dear suckeddry and tickleme63,

thank you both for the encouraging advice. I hope that this will pass, and she will revert back to like being on her own in the moses basket.

best wishes

mike

congratulations! what a start hope things settle down for you.

someone told me that 3s and 6s are times of rapid growth (months and weeks). dont know how true that is but it fits with my dd currently tearing our hair out at 6 months . it might have nothing to do with the hospital stay and just be a natural change or a growth spurt.

i co sleep with my dd and have since birth. dd feeds as and when she needs and i almost sleep through. i was worried about squashing her to begin with but its natural and your instincts mean you sleep curled around your baby. theres lots if good advice on here about cosleeping. it might actually help your wife relax having baby close when shes been so poorly.