toddler is still awake, where is the bloody sandman?

[Magneto]

Ds has been very good sleeping since he was about 8 months old (before that he woke every 2 hours. I still wince at the memory). However he is now 23 months and bedtime is becoming a problem.

He no longer naps during the day because it was disrupting his bedtimes. This afternoon he was falling asleep on the sofa so I took him up to bed at 6pm. I followed his normal nightly routine, nappy, eczema cream, bottle, story and bed. He is still awake and crying three hours later.

I have followed what I normally do and what I have done since he was 8 months old - going in to resettle him every 10-15 minutes. I have tried giving him hugs to reassure him, I've tried not talking to him and just putting him back in bed, I've tried everything. And he's still not asleep.

What do I have to do to make him go to sleep??? This is starting to become a nightly occurance now.

Hi, I don't have any magic answer for you but DD did exactly the same thing a few months back around the same age.

After 8 weeks of rapid return (she's a proper stubborn, persistent little thing) nights on end curled up with her in the toddler bed I thought I was going to go crazy Then magically it all resettled again.

It will pass, I put the whole episode down to something developmental (isn't it always)

I must add, dh works late so is not here for bedtime. This has always been the case but ds has started crying for daddy at bedtime. When I go into him he's very cuddly, he'd be quite happy if I sat in bed with him but I really do not want to go down that route when I know he can get himself to sleep.

I would be fine to cosleep and have done it on occassion when ds won't resettle but past experience tells me that ds doesn't sleep if he's in our bed. He spends all night playing on the bed with mummy and daddy or looking out of the window so neither of us actually get any sleep that way.

sorry x-posted, thanks for the reply funble. The temptation to let him get up is strong, but I am stronger!!!

Sandman is AWOL here too .

Almost identical situation - DD has slept like a dream since 8 mo ish bar the odd few nights and is now 23 mo and currently jumping on my bed singing.

I'm bloody shattered, DD and I have been out all day - no pushchair lots of excersise, she is not ill or teething or unsettled she just isn't tired.

I'm tired. Very tired, and I have to go and clear out the kitchen for the plumber coming first thing - but I can't untill she goes to sleep incase she does herself a mischief.

It sounds like he may be overtired. My 3yo still needs a nap sometimes, to me 23mo is young to be dropping the nap already.

If he were mine I would probably not bother with the resettling. It's obviously not working, maybe even disturbing him further?

I really hope he sleeps soon, it's awful when you have nights like that.

Yes I'm not too sure about the nap to be honest, he is very bad at falling asleep if not in his bed which is where he used to nap but he would sleep for 3-4 hours in the middle of the day if I let him. So I have decided that if he wants to nap he can, but he can't go to bed to do it as he sleeps too deeply iyswim? This has led to him often not napping at all and sometimes falling asleep on the sofa, if it's early in the afternoon that's fine but if it's too close to bedtime it's too disruptive. I'm trying to find that happy medium and failing.

When he was 8 mo and I had finally cracked getting him to sleep and he would do 7-7 plus two regular hour and a half long naps were bliss. Sadly they are now a distant memory and I'm back to not knowing what he wants. Sigh.

if it is any consolation to you, all three of mine are still awake

When they're teenagers and all they want to do is sleep, I think this completely justifies making them get up at silly o'clock in the morning to go on hiking trips or to car boot sales.

agree sounds like he may be getting overtired. I think this age can be difficult because a long nap is too much, but they still need something to sustain them through the day. I think going from napping for several hours per day to nothing was possibly too big of a jump.

Have you considered letting him continue napping, but perhaps wake him after a certain amount of time? That way he still gets a sleep (in his cot if that's where he likes to nap) but he won't nap for so long that it interferes with bedtime. It might take a bit of trial & error to find what works for him but I'd say a nap after lunch of somewhere between 1-1.5hrs is a good starting point.

I'm doing this with my DS (23 months) too. he would nap for 2hrs if left to his own devices (also in cot) but he won't settle at bedtime. He currently naps for 1.5hrs from 1pm and I think he now needs it capping a bit shorter. He sleeps 8pm-7am.

It has gone quiet here. Fingers crossed she has gone to sleep!

I fully intend to take up early morning tuba practice when DD hits those teenage years. And when she moans I shall remind her of moments like this

My nearly 22 mo DD has just started to do exactly the same thing. It started when we took the sides off her cot a few weeks ago. She used to have NO problems settling down to sleep. No she's in an d out of bed, getting tireder and tireder, like it's some game. Meantime we plough up and down stairs, sit her on naughty step etc to then find she is destroying her bedroom, bathroom etc accompanied by cheeky grin. It's like she has conpletely forgotten how to wind down. Eventually she will just crash, and fall asleep wherever she is upstairs. It is getting embarrassing at nursery to take her in as she is still vvvvv tired most mornings despite waking up naturally, with massive bags under ger eyes. As a last resort tonight DH sprayed Boots sleepy pillow mist around her to get her to wind down. It goes without saying that tv is banned before bedtime. we have always had the same bedtime routine since she was born.

Does anyone else have any suggestions to help? I am a medical professional - was even thinking of the Bach flower remedies.

Quiet here too, I might actually be able to have a shower and go to bed now. I will be waking up in 7 hours to go to work. Even just writing that makes me tired.

gaschick the only thing I can think of to try if it doesn't pass for my DD, is to empty her bedroom and stand outside the door and constantly put her back into bed.

My thinking being if there are no toys to interest her, and she can't get past the door and the only attention she gets is me marching her into bed saying nothing - then she might give in.

No idea if that will work but I think it is what I will try.

Is her bedroom dark? I know the light can affect some children.

gaschick firstly, I would get a baby gate on her bedroom door to limit the amount of space she can wander. Our doorhandles are shoulder height so ds can't reach them to get out of his room.

He too is slowly destroying everything in his room, the list of items awaiting repair is getting longer and longer and includes the lid of his toybox, the hem of his blinds and somehow getting rid of the scratches on the wooden floor from where he has tried to drag his bed around the room!!!

I appreciate that I am hardly an expert in these matters (ha!) but I wouldn't bother with the naughty step while you are trying to get her to sleep. I would just return her to her bed every fifteen minutes or so.

This does work with ds normally and unlike Oreo's method above, as long as he plays quietly I let him play in his room until he's tired (sometimes he even get's back into bed himself!). This normally only takes about half an hour. The problem I've been having recently is that he is just screaming for hours on end.

I think he's asleep now so I'm going to make sure he's actually in bed...

random errant apostrophes in that post sorry.