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Why oh why is my 19 month old waking during the night?

2 replies

emmyloo2 · 02/07/2012 02:41

Hi all,
I am hoping someone can answer my question because I think I am slowly becoming depressed.

My 19 month old was a good night sleeper until around 13 or 14 months when he started waking during the night. Before that he has been a pretty consistent sleep through the nighter from an early age. My DH of course, have done all the wrong things and have been giving him a bottle of milk which seems to settle him quickly. However, it seems to have got worse. Some nights he doesn't wake at all and we recently had a week where he slept through every night. However, this week it's been back to waking around 3am or 4am every morning. It's like an alarm goes off in his head and he is up. He sometimes falls asleep in our bed but it means I don't get much sleep.

Last night however he woke at 10pm and then basically every hour crying. It seemed he was in pain and it kept waking him up because I could go in there and stroke his back and he would start snoring again but then wake again in 30 or 40 minutes. Eventually we brought him into our bed at 3am and he slept until 7am.

I have racked my brains trying to think what it could be. Teeth, upset stomach?? Cold, hot, too much day time sleep, not enough day time sleep. (He naps once a day from anywhere from 45 min until 2.5 hours depending on what he decides).

What's worrying me is (a) that we are creating bad habits and he is now just in the habit of waking up; or (b) he is in pain and I can't identify the source of the pain; or (c) I am just a useless mother who is doing everything wrong.

What is most confusing is he seems to slip out of the waking for a week or a couple of nights and then starts again. My DH and I are really starting to wonder what on earth is going on.

any advice, thoughts etc would be much appreciated.

Emma

OP posts:
emmyloo2 · 02/07/2012 02:42

*sorry that should say my DH and I have been doing all the wrong things. I am not blaming him alone!

OP posts:
sagenod · 02/07/2012 03:03

Sounds like my DS2 (18mo), who invariably finishes his nights wedged between DP and me...

How is your DS during the day when (before) he wakes up at night? If he was ill/in pain/teething, is there anything in his daytime behaviour which could point to that and eliminate your option b?

Def not option c I am sure. :)

Which leaves option a...I think this is likely with my DS, who knows that waking at 3am=bed with nice warm parents in it. What to do about it?

Dunno.

I was thinking of trying something I read years ago about 'waking to sleep' where you set your alarm for about 20 minutes before the child's usual waking time and you go in and just slightly rouse them to 'break the cycle' of waking at x am...can't remember exactly though-hopefully someone better informed will be along soon...

You are not alone! But for my DS it is totally our fault for having to put him into a big bed due to space issues. He slept so so well before. Now I reckon we only get about 1 night per fortnight without a little person in our bed.

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