Feeling sad about cc

[brokenmummy]

Hi,

I guess I just want some moral support! I have just done cc for first time :( ds is 12mo and I was at the end of my tether.

I left him 1min, 1min, 2mins, 2mins, 3mins, 5 mins, 7mins. Each time i lay him back down, held my hand on his back and said the same thing eacj time. I wld stay in there for about 30 secs each time.

The last time I went in he lpoked so exhausted and defeated that I just couldn't leave him. I ended up gliding my hand on his back for the 30secs or so it took him to finally fall asleep. I feel terrible, like that ending has defeated the whole point of doing it.

The while thing took about half an hr so not all together hideous but I still feel terrible and hated every minute, that said, I couldnt see another option.

I don't know if I can do it all over again tho so fingers crossed it had some effect!

(((hugs))) and

The first night is the worst

Maybe gradual retreat would suit you better? Still some crying but you get to sit with them, worked in 4 nights for DD. There was a massive thread about it in sleep. But any method will work as long as you stick with it. Good luck!

We started off trying gradual withdrawal, but he just didn't get it, spent far too long trying to party and then it all ended up hay as traumatic as the cc tonight. In fact he was probably worse last night with me sat in there with him.

I don't really want to have to do that in the middle Imog the night. Is it ok to do cc for bedtime, carry on dealing with night wakings as normal and then tackle them once we have bedtime sorted?

I think that's a suggestion I've read about, which is to concentrate on one of the put downs and when that's sorted to move onto the next one. The Pantley book suggests that you do whatever you have to do for naps etc as regular napping is supposed to help nighttime sleep.

'Is it ok to do cc for bedtime, carry on dealing with night wakings as normal and then tackle them once we have bedtime sorted?'

Thats how I did it with my dd

Thanks for the responses. Night two was a bit of a non event. He fel asleep just 5 mins into his bedtime feed. I tried so so hard to wake him but he just wouldn't wake up! He murmured and wriggeld around when I put him down, but he certainly wasn't properly alert. Which totally defeats the point of the whole thing and probably sets us back a day.

We had a fairly good night in the end last night, he only woke for one feed but I heard him settle himself very quickly a couple of times.

I was all geared up for getting this sorted quickly but I can't. Ring myself to change the bed time routine to bring the feed earlier! I just don't know if he'd take a decent feed any earlier and if I'm go est, I love that feed.

Has anyone managed to keep up the sleepy feed but still get their ex to self settle. My main aim is for other People to be able to put him to be with a cup, but for me to bf him on the nights I'm here (most of them)

Go est = honest
Ex= dc!

Hi again

So ds has stirred (yelped) several times this evening but settled himself in seconds. Which is great, right? Was very excited about this until I went in to check on him and he is lying horizontally across the bottom of the cot, on his bck, twisted round so his neck is bent up against the bars! It looks so sad! I guess the point I self settling is that they get themselves comfortable? But it looks as though he has just collapsed there :(

Does anyone else's dc sleep in such weird positions?
Should I move him?

If dd hasn't got her head covered and arse in the air, then she does sleep at the bottom of her cot, she looks like she had been folded iyswim.

If he is asleep, I would leave him be

Yep, 15 month old DD frequently sleeps in odd positions. I once picked her up upside down as I didn't realise where her head was. DH will some times move her, but he had longer arms and seems to be able to do it without disturbing her.

I have done cc with her - very similar to what you did with shorter gaps and frequently she fell asleep when I went in to settle her. In the end I think that this isn't necessarily a bad thing as it teaches them that they need to wind down before sleeping and secondly that you will come back and are always there.

Gradual retreat didn't work for us either. Too much time was spent trying to engage me and then she got over tired and cried anyway.

The other thing we did was to switch the last feed to the lounge from the bedroom so it was no longer associated with feeding.

The one big lesson this has taught me is about persistence.

How did it go tonight OP?

Hey, thanks for asking... Well the same as yesterday really, although I tried harder to wake him up and he was kind of awake when I put him down... But on the plus side, after just two nights genus k ly waking just once around 4am, for a feed, and also is settling much better for naps and sleeping for longer! I also hear him wake and put himself back to sleep which is great.

I've actually just started another thread asking if anyone has managed to keep on feeding to sleep but managed to get dc sleeping through. And crucially, getting ten to go to bed for other people without a bf. I really don't want to stop the bedtime bf or change the order of the routine as it seems like such a lovely way for us both to end the day.

Anyway. This weekend we cc the night waking! Wih me luck!

Sorry for terrible iPhone typos...

That sounds load better, can't help with the bf as I ff

Good luck