Can someone please help me understand this crazy behaviour?

[greeneone12]

Gosh this feels weird! I used to live on here and haven't looked in ages!

I am so confused by my 19 months old behaviour. She has never been great at going to bed - always had a whinge and a moan but loves story time before we pay her down with her teddy. Generally things haven't been too bad. 3 short stories around 7.30pm, then I start her glow worm, say bedtime, kiss her and lay her down with her teddy. Normally I lay her down, stroke her back and leave the room. She whinges a bit but is normally alright.

Recently she screams as soon as I turn the light out. She lunges towards the door and literally goes crazy. I have been putting her in the cot anyway and sitting next to it - rubbing her back and saying bedtime but she climbs to get out.

I am so sad as I feel as if she hates her bedroom. What's even worse is DP did bedtime the other day and she didn't make a noise. Not for her day nap either and she always plays up for me :( What have I done?!!

She does have eczema and has been itchy in the heat but we have started giving piriton 1 hour before bed so I am convinced it isn't that. She is a very headstrong, determined, 'knows what she wants' character - I just hate hearing her cry but really think this whole thing is a big protest.

Any pearls of wisdom would be apprecited! Thanks in advance.

At around 18 months there is huge developmental leap going on - language explosion, greater awareness of independence & ability to make choices - so it could be she is trying to assert her independence & say 'no I don't want to go down!'. We had similar at that age with DS & he would also try & use delaying tactics eg 'another story' or 'playing'. We didn't allow him to extend our wind down routine & stuck to our guns & for a while there was a fair bit of crying at both nap & bedtime, but it has generally settled down again now.

However, we did also find that his sleep went a bit wonky too as he needed a slight change in routine. We found that pushing his nap a wee bit later to 1pm helped him be more tired for his nap and ready for bed at bedtime (as he'd previously been napping at 12.30pm for 2hrs but was taking over 30mins to settle at bedtime & suddenly started waking earlier).

If you'd like to post her daytime routine I'd happily spare you my thoughts.

Thanks omama! I am working with my childminder who has a strict 1pm-2.30pm nap routine. Long story short but there is no changing that and she is our 2nd childminder who we are really happy with after a disaster with our first.

Our DD wakes between 6.30am and 7pm, sleeps from 1pm - 2.30 or 3pm and then goes to bed at 7.30-8pm. She has never been a 12 hour sleeper but any advice you might have would be welcome. Thanks - she did have a phase like this a few weeks ago but we thought it was all over. Then this has all started again. Very depressing indeed!

My DD's sleep pattern went from good to bad around this age and I would second what omama says.

However things did improve when we removed DD's alphabet mural from her bedroom wall & started to leave the landing light on overnight.

Is there anything in your Dd's room that may scare her? Something that may not be obvious to us grown ups.

I really can't think of anything. Why would removing her alphabet mural help? Am I being dim?

Agree they can be scared of random things. My DD is nearly 4yo and able to articulate her fears quite well. The other night she thought a tree on the picture on her wall was nasty. Tonight she told me that her teddy bear would roar at her in the night. Bonkers, but it stopped her from settling until the offending items were removed or covered.

Her whole sleep pattern changed at 18mo. We got through it in the end, but it took a while.

The shadows it cast in her bedroom Greenone

Basically I sat in DD'S bedroom for a bit one night in the dark at cot level, and tried to work out what might be scary to a little one.