What do you think?

[SarahJinx]

DS is 12 months. In the past year his sleep has been mixed, up and down hourly to going right through, sometimes we get up for an hour, sometimes not, he hasn't night fed since around four months old, teething chucks everything out of the window, but at the moment he's sleeping till half sixish after a period of waking up pre 5am.....the one thing we've never had a problem with is bedtime, he's always fallen asleep during or straight after his last feed at 7.45 ish.....until now.

This week he's fed, had a cuddle and basically fought me until half freaking nine and I just wanted to run through some stuff with some more experienced ladies to garner some opinion.

I've been back at work for four weeks, he's in nursery 8 - 5 two days and at my mums two days so I appreciate there has been a major change in his life. He has always napped in his cot morning (down for an hour/hour and half from 9.30/10 ish) and in the afternoon for an hour, I would always wake him pre four pm, dinner at half five, bath at seven then feed and bed. He has settled in extremely well at nursery and keeps to this nap schedule both there and at my mums. I keep reading about dropping naps and getting to one, long nap in the middle of the day but with just getting back to work, we haven't gone there yet.

I wonder if he is now sleeping too much in the day? I wonder if he is napping too late (3 -4 this week) I wonder if he should go to bed earlier? He's in a cot in with us, he has his own room but we want him with us really. I really don't want to do cc, I won't consider it.

So, what do you think? I'll ride out the late nights if its a phase, but any advice would be v v v much appreciated.

How funny, we just posted the same kind of question about bedtime at the same time...

I've been wondering whether napping will make a difference too. FWIW I cut down DS's naps considerably when he was 12 months (he's now 18 months) to just 1.5 hours a day from 12.30 - 2pm, and it worked wonders. He became a fantastic sleeper for the next 6 months... which brings me to now! So I would perhaps try that. Some babies need to drop naps sooner than others.

I just read yours, I know nothing really but I've been scanning this section for tips (until tonight when I considered I could just post myself....) and I keep coming across an 18 month sleep regression, so......

Its such a bugger isn't it, my issue is really the same a yours in that we're up at 6 (I have a 50 mile commute and have to get him to childcare) I need to go to be early but I also need a bit of time to myself of an evening.

Could you tell me/advise on how to change the nap schedule please? /its difficult as it isn't going to be me doing it, but I can get the nursery and my ma (she'll hate it, proper old school!) to try.

Thank you for replying!

No problem, I hope changing the nap schedule works - it yielded dramatic results for us! To be honest I didn't do anything too complicated - I just counted 5 hours from whatever time he woke up in the morning (or more like 4.5 hours to begin with) and put him down for a nap then. It was always after lunch. He was so tired that he slept instantly, and then I woke him (or sometimes he woke naturally) 90 mins later. It was then roughly another 4,5-5 hours until bedtime.

Over the past couple of months, his nap has reduced down to just one hour, which has been quite a natural progression. But bedtimes are becoming awful all of a sudden, so it's good to hear from you that it could indeed be a normal regression...

God, don't take my word for it, I know nothing. Making this motherhood thing up as I go along me! I just keep seeing it as I've been going through, so it could be your problem i guess.

Thanks again for your reply, so if I stick to the 5 hour thing, he's up at half six at the moment, so half eleven lunch and back down after, you think? Say for up to two hours - till 2...then back to bed at 7? does that sound right or hopelessly optimistic?!

That sounds totally right - good luck! And obviously be flexible with food - now that I think about it, I sometimes waited until after the nap to give DS lunch as he was too tired to eat properly before his nap, but after a few weeks/ months he was capable of staying awake for longer and eating first.

It does sound like he may be on his way towards 1 nap, but its a transition that can take many months to complete. You may find that jumping suddenly from 2-1 naps will go well, but you may also find that after 2-3 days he gets very very overtired. The majority of babies transition sometime between 15-18 months, of course some earlier, but they need to be able to handle staying awake for 5hrs either side of their nap every single day - which is a lot for a 12 month old. My DS started on 1 nap days at 12months but couldn't handle them every day until 15months old. The alternative is to do a gradual transition, by starting to cap one of the naps. You can cap either nap but there are some things to be aware of:

if your LO usually takes their longer nap in the morning, and the afternoon nap is getting late meaning they are not tired enough for bedtime you could cut down on the afternoon nap. So perhaps allow 45mins nap instead of 1hr. He should be more tired for bed & settle more quickly. Over time the morning nap will gradually shift later towards lunchtime & the teatime nap will need capping shorter & shorter until its eventually a tiny catnap that can be dropped, and you offer early bedtime instead. The biggest thing to watch out for if you take this route is overtiredness at bedtime, because the bulk of his daytime sleep is in the morning. If he gets OT you might find he starts to wake earlier, hen he will need a longer nap, and if its an early one it will keep him waking early. So be aware that you will need to encourage the morning nap a little later than 9.30/10am start - maybe more like 10/10.30. Also you are more likely to get PM nap refusal with a long AM nap.

Or if your LO is always really ready for his morning nap, you could cut back the morning nap & allow a long nap after lunch. So keep it at 9.30am & start to cut it back by 15mins every 3 days until its 30 mins max. As you shorten this nap he will need to take a longer and earlier PM nap. Eventually you will have something like a 15-30min nap at 9.30/9.45am and a 1.5-2hr nap at 12.30/1pm. You may well find that the AM nap needs to go shorter than 30mins at this age, to prevent early waking. The benefit of this option is that having the longer nap after lunch prevents overtiredness at bedtime. The downside I suppose is the risk that the PM nap goes wrong & then you will have a very OT child on your hands.

If you do go straight for the jump to 1 nap, I would probably just push his current morning nap later by 15mins every 3 days until its at lunchtime (around 5hrs after waking) and cut back the afternoon nap by 15mins every 3 days until its gone. Then replace it with early bedtime. And I wouldn't cap his nap just yet - let him sleep what he needs as it is a big change for him to adjust to. Finally don't be afraid of early bedtimes. You may find in the first couple of weeks of your transition you get some very short naps of 30mins-1hr as he will likely get overtired. On these days, get him in bed for 5.30 or 6pm & he will make up for it overnight. At that age we had some lovely 6pm BT's & 7am wakeups!

Good luck whatever you decide. Phew - epic post sorry!

Seriously omama even the fact that you would ho to so much trouble to detail all of that makes me a bit teary(I am very tired and stressed tho!) thank you so very much, that's exactly the kind of advice I was after. I asked nursery to start to push back his am nap and limit his pm one but again, two major naps today, 9.30 - 10.45 and 2.15 to 3.45!!! I'm a bit irked by that but nursery is still new to him and conks him out I guess. Once again, hr went to sleep at nine tonight. I have him to myself Friday, Saturday and Sunday so will start trying the transition then, thank you again.