3 month old will no longer nurse to sleep!

[gingemum2b]

I know nursing to sleep is seen as a sleep prop and I intended to gradually get my little one out of the habit (started with the Pantley pull off earlier this week, which was starting to work really well!), however she has now decided that at night she no longer will feed to sleep and is crying instead. Tried rocking, patting, walking but none of these an get her to sleep. Finally, after about 20 mins of crying she will accept the boob again and will fall asleep nursing, as she did before.

I think this is a signal that maybe she needs to learn to get to sleep a little more independently. She has a bath, then bottle and then would usually go on the boob and go to sleep quickly and easily.

Thinking of trying ssshh pat, although half heatedly tried it before and she just screamed, until I finally put her on the boob. No way I'm going to just leave her to cry.

I'm reading the No Cry Sleep Solution, however I haven't stemmed to have come across what to do in this situation?!

Any suggestions would be gratefully received! xxx

I'm afraid I don't know any of the methods you're referring to

However, if she gets comfort out of the sucking action then maybe a dummy would help? If you inch it out of her mouth just as she dozes off then she might realise that she doesn't need it in order to be asleep.

Otherwise, we found walking up and down with a gentle bobbing motion sent our DS right off after 15 minutes

Later on when he fussed at night I deliberately didn't pick him up but rubbed his chest instead while breathing loudly and regularly - he was a bit 'WTF?' initially but soon got used to it and would drift back off on his own. Nowadays he has been known to get through the night (7.30pm-6am) by himself - he does wake up but re-settles all on his own. So proud!

I hope some of the above is useful :)

By the way, he is now 11mo - not a tiny baby with ridiculously good sleeping habits! How old is your DD?

I would definitely second the dummy advice. My LO had a dummy from a few days old and when he stopped bfing to sleep in the day when he was about 10 weeks I just used the dummy instead plus I found swaddling helped. I always made sure I removed it once he was asleep if it hadn't fallen out and so far (touch wood) he does seem to be able to resettle without it if he wakes in the night. He is 5 months now and most nights only wakes once for a feed between 11pm and 7am.

Thanks guys! Unfortunately she refuses a dummy! I have tried loads of brands and have persisted, but she looks at me like in stupid and starts to gag! Now she's nearly 14 weeks I think I may give up trying!

I'm glad that she feels she no longer needs the comfort of nursing (which she did need pretty much constantly, but I can't seem to teach her to go to sleep any other way!

Do you have a partner or someone who lives with you and is not lactating?! Maybe they could take over responsibility for getting her to sleep of an evening (while you put a pair of earplugs in).

I know you've said you don't want her to cry, but with the best will in the world she is going to cry if you don't give her exactly what she wants. It only takes one or two experiences (IME) for babies to realise they don't need the sleep props they thought they did and to go down happily. My DS howled blue murder the first time we didn't pick him up at night but the next night he barely noticed. I really feel that by not letting him get used to a habit that we were going to have to break later, we did him a favour and saved him a lot of future anguish.

This is something that some parents just don't feel comfortable with though, so I'd understand if you didn't want to.....

Ah, just spotted how old your DD is - durr. Should read thread titles!!

Thanks for your advice. I have had no choice with the crying thing the last couple of nights as nothing seems to comfort her! Sounds funny, but it'd easier to have her crying when there's nothing I can seem to do about it! We have a cosleeping cot so I think tonight I will just lay beside and comfort her rather than trying everything under the sun to comfort her. Not sure when it comes to it I will be able to...wish me luck! x

I know what you mean - it's awful to feel like you're being mean and witholding whatever it is they want, but in the long run you really will be doing her a favour (and you might get some more sleep too)!

Maybe try lying next to her and rubbing her tummy... good luck