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Original poster

My 2.4 year old wakes up at least once every night - am I alone?

9 replies

Ragtaggle · 18/02/2006 07:27

Every night my 2.4 year old wakes up screaming for me or her dad at her stair gate, usually once but sometimes more. When I go in she starts screaming that she can't find her water or her teddy or something. If I'm lucky I can settle her within ten minutes but sometimes it's up to twenty minutes, I do that 'rapid return' thing whereby after initially being nice I just keep wordlessly returning her to bed from the stairgate. (The twenty minute sessions can mean up to forty 'returns' to bed) The problem is I have a 4 month old as well who I have to feed around fourish so when dd wakes me it's really hard to get back to sleep (Because I know I might be up again within the hour) This is driving me mad.

We did cc initially but I honestly believe it made her worse. She is so persistent that she can keep screaming the same thing for up to three hours before eventually making herself sick. The rapid return thing 'works' much better for us in that we get her back off quite quickly but it hasn't stopped her doing it. I suppose I want reassurance that this isn't going to go on forever and that I'm not alone. All my friends children seem to sleep seven to seven without a hitch

OP posts:
Tommy · 18/02/2006 08:38

you're not alone
It is very exhausting but IME, you just have to find what works for you as a family. My DS1 had a beaker of milk in the night for ages when he really "shouldn't" have needed it but it got him back to sleep so he didn't wake the baby so that's what we did.
It won't go on forever - last night, all four of us had a good night's sleep

Tommy · 18/02/2006 08:39

soory - didn't mean to sound smug that we all had a good night's sleep and you didn't - it's just that it's the first one we've all had in a while

Papillon · 18/02/2006 08:42

I am going to buy this book which is about teaching your child to relax themselves

Boy and a Bear

There are other books out there for sleeping and reassurance that might be of help.

If you cannot get back to sleep for the hour before your baby wakes up have you thought of just staying with her and stroking her head, giving reassurance that everything is alright? She may be finding the wordless returns to be abit like CC which did not go done well and might be freaking her out.

cathyspam · 18/02/2006 08:51

just to let you know you are not alone, my wonderful sleeper turned into a nightmare while his back teeth were coming in and for a few months we have had awful nights but last night my DS aged 2.6 years slept all night in his own bed and was the last up this morning at 7.30! It will pass and I think you are probably doing the right thing - you may just be zombified for a while!

FrannyandZooey · 18/02/2006 09:47

My son is nearly 3 and I can count on the fingers of one hand the nights where he has slept through. You are not alone and it is perfectly normal for small children to need help getting back to sleep in the night. Just help her as much as you can and wait for her to grow out of it - which she will - it will be much easier and more pleasant for you all if you just accept her need for you at times in the night, and this phase will hopefully pass quickly.

Papillon · 18/02/2006 12:40

I know families who put the baby in the same room as the toddler, they report that their toddler then sleeps better - perhaps because they then know they are not alone.

Original poster
Ragtaggle · 18/02/2006 16:14

Thanks for these reassurances. Am interested in the idea of putting baby in same room as toddler - can sort of imagine this working in a funny sort of way. My dd loves company and has become quite attached to her brother in the last few weeks (Phew) One question for franandzooey- did your friends wait until the baby was sleeping through the night before she did this? I can just imagine the horror of them both waking each other up....

OP posts:
Papillon · 18/02/2006 16:31

Perhaps the question was for the humble Papillon Ragtaggle? About room sharing?

No they do not wait till baby sleeps through. One family I know, their baby is 2 months old and is feed twice a night.

We as family all sleep in the same room and dd has rarely woken to ds crying. And ds has slept through dd teething and just general waking.

FrannyandZooey · 18/02/2006 16:51

Hi Ragtaggle, yes I think you mixed me up with Papillon. The only caveat I would add to Papillon's advice, is that you would have to be absolutely certain that the toddler was able to be trusted alone with the baby - you are unlikely to know what is going on in their room after you have gone to sleep yourself. The sort of situation I am thinking of, is the toddler waking up and deciding to get in the cot with tiny baby, which of course could have disastrous consequences. I think when they are both a bit older it would work very well.

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