Cot trauma

[Roxymm]

Hello i seriously needs some advice. I have a 1yr old bf baby, and i am due with my second child in 3 months.i need to get my toddler out of my bed and into his cot. I tryer controlled crying, since then he seems to be traumatised and now i cant even get him to stand or go anywhere near his cot. What can i do to encourage him and take the negative association away from the cot and make it a happy time

do you have space in your room for the cot?

if so i would take the side off, and push it up against your bed.
then after a while put the side back on, but dropped down (if you can do that)- still leave it next to your bed

then gradually move it away from your bed, so still in your room, bbut not right next to you

i may go back to doing that. i had the cot against my bed for a while but he would just crawl staright into bed. out of frustration i did the controlled crying. i feel really bad that it's affected him this way.

We have a similar thing with our 13m DD, though we've never done controlled crying. She's ok around the cot and playing in it for a while during the day but come to bedtime and trying to lie her down and go to sleep she screams and screams. No amount of reassuring stroking, patting or talking seems to work and we end up just picking her up again and trying to sing or, failing that, feed to sleep. I'd be happy if she was just messing about playing with toys instead of sleeping but she sounds really distressed.

Any ideas greatly received, but there's no room for the cot in our room, and she's been in her own room for about 7 months now.

i tryed last night pulling the cot up against the bed, left the drop rail on but ensured the cot mattress was level with my bed mattress so dd could see me as soon as he woke up.

i let dd fall asleep on the breast and on our bed. i attempted 10 times to put dd in the cot so did ds help. eventually i let dd fall asleep bf but instead of allowing dd to hold onto me i put a teddy in between us and had dd hold the teddy. dd was so tired at that point that he didn't notice that dd was holding teddy (teddy was originally mine from when i was little still keep it near my bed but now dd will be using as it has my smell, also i put my pillow case on his cot, (read somewhere carry a swaddle, comfort toy or even your baby bed sheet around with you all day so it carry's your smell)). i ensured that dd blanket was already over dd/or me so it warms up.

at 1am i made my final attempt at putting dd in the cot, holding the teddy. stuck the top part of my body in cot with my cheek against dd for a few seconds. quickly covered dd up.

AND WOOHAY dd slept till QUARTER TO 7 this morning with no further bf through night.
i suppose it gets easier to put dd in cot.

thanks to all the great advice recieved on mumsnet

yay!

we did a similar thing with DS2 when he was about 10 months old and we introduced his "pup" which was a big snuggly blanket thing. i kept it between us every time I fed him and then he was still holding it and would stay asleep. it worked really well

hope your little one continues to sleep well with his teddy :)