How can I make him sleep?! Long, very long.

[TalHotBlond]

I have a very, very over-tired two and a half year old. He has enough eye luggage for a month, his concentration span is shot to pieces and the
constant whinging and throwing things in temper and clumsiness and meltdowns are getting beyond a joke.

This has been going on for about three weeks. He has an 8mo baby brother and we had a few issues with food after he was born and now this so it could be linked. Also he has also had a new bed (which he does really like) and has gifted his old cot and mobile to his little brother.

We couldn't get him to sleep in the bed at all to start with. He's usually so good at bedtimes but we had several nights of screaming for hours on end, throwing his toys about, kicking the stair gate, real aggression I had never seen from him before and refusal to get into bed, stay in bed and sleep.

Now he will go down with only a bit of crying at about half seven
but stays awake making noises to himself til around 11pm at least. He also gets out of his bed and into ours several times per night and wakes up to start the day with DH at 6am. No naps during the day. He is wired all the time but sometimes starts falling asleep at about 4pm which I try to discourage in case he won't go to sleep at bedtime. The two times I've allowed this (I keep thinking he must just be desperate for sleep) he has slept like the dead til around 7pm and then the following night was a disaster so it seems that he won't sleep through from these "naps".

He is behaving badly, falling over all the time and I've tried everything to get him to bed and sleeping early, nap at lunchtime and he is just wired and refuses. I'm going to take him to the doctors if this carries on.

I have an 8mo and they are literally sleeping in shifts. I am stressed out as feel that I am "on" all the time and never have a moment to myself and the acting out and tantrums through tiredness are really starting to drag me down. I'm on maternity leave and counting down the hours until my husband gets home each day so I don't have to deal with him on my own.

Sorry that was rambling and doesnt make much sense. I wasn't sure what was relevant to mention and I'm so tired and ratty at the moment I am barely functioning.

Phew no wonder you are pooped! Does he ever nap out in the pram or car? My dd1 2.8 went through a phase of not going to bed very well but it did pass. If we put her to bed at 7 she was sometimes still talking to herself until 8. Is it nice and dark in the bed room?

You poor thing, you must be shattered which makes everything harder.
If he falls asleep at 4 have you tried waking him after half an hour so he's just had a short nap?
How is your bedtime structured - for example bath, quiet story and a song in bed, so when you leave him to go to sleep he's calm and wound down. Then gentle rapid returns if he does get up so you're being calm, but firm. Also as someone else said, is the bedroom nice and dark, also does he have lots of toys up there - that can be distracting and stimulating.

Thanks for your replies.

He does nap in the car but I only have it when DH isn't at work so not much good wrt timing really! He would sleep in his old pram but not the new double buggy who h is quite "upright" even when leant back.

I tend to give him a bath, do teeth in bath and put his pyjamas on and get him into bed, lights down, read story with milk. Lately he then demands another, keeps trying to get me to read more, has tantrum, throws book, throws milk. It's not good.

I've actually been doing his room out so there are lots of new bits and pieces in there, plus his toys and furniture has been moved around etc plus the new bed. All probably not helping. He does have a black out blind though and we turn off all the lights so it is properly dark.

He will sometimes stay in bed if I stand out on the landing and he can hear me but it can still take hours for him to drop off. Leaving him to cry has worked occasionally if he is really tired but it's hard to do. I feel as if I'm not being consistent enough, that I have indulged him and now he is just walking all over me.

(((hugs))) hun. Sounds really tough. I'm not in best position to advise as my LO isn't there yet, but couldn't read & run. How long has it been since he stopped napping in the day? Is it a fairly recent thing? One thing I wondered was whether you could try doing a super early bedtime at say 6pm. Since he is getting up at 6am & not napping in the day, 7.30pm is quite a late BT & so maybe he is already OT by that point so struggling to settle. Giving an early bedtime like often frightens many folks because of the worry they will just get up super early the next morning, but often it can result in a later wakeup because they sleep more soundly as they aren't overtired IYSWIM?

Plus of course the new bed/changes in his room are likely compounding the issue. So perhaps an early bedtime coupled with a consistent approach (Jo Frost style) of returning him to his bed each time he gets out, so he eventually gets the message you mean business. Or perhaps a stairgate on his bedroom door to stop him getting out in the middle of the night?

What do you think?