One year old twins won't sleep in their cots

[whitewhitewine]

Hi all

My twins (nearly 1) have never been good sleepers. Through pure desperation of needing sleep, we've been co-sleeping with them from around 7 months. They sleep much better in bed with us but we have no life. They literally will not even go in their cots at all anymore, so one of us ends up going to bed early with them. They will scream if put in their cot.

Can anyone recommend anything that worked for them, or a book I could read?

We have briefly tried pick up put down but did give in when they wouldn't calm down. They were screaming so much (when we were holding them) they were nearly sick, took a very long time to calm down and were crying on and off for hours.

My HV did suggest doing controlled crying- she said it was the only thing that would work now. We've tried leaving them in the past and timing it, only for very little each time- they are not the type of babies that will stop crying after 10 minutes.

Any ideas?!

Think your HV is giving poor advice there. Both of mine have moved from the family bed into their own bed and eventually made the transition to sleeping all night without CIO. Seems like this is the standard response from our HVs.

There is a book you can read, we used it with DS and it is fab and most libraries have it. It's the No Cry Sleep Solution and sounds just up your street .

This article might be helpful and 31 ways to get your baby to sleep and stay asleep is a great article and might be of some benefit

Do you think it could be separation anxiety?

Thanks so much for your reply!

Have just had a look for the book online- it is the baby one I need isn't it, not the toddler-preschool?

I don't know much about seperation anxiety but will have a proper read of your link, thank you. My daughter is very clingy with me at night- she needs to be touching or cuddling me most of the night and will cry if I leave the room. My husband can only occasionally settle her to sleep (eventually) if she can't see or hear me, but only by walking her around the house rocking her to sleep (we are going to work on this). I'm a SAHM so they are with me all day and she's fine whenever she goes to my parents house or In laws and loves going there when I'm not with her, and isn't clingy when other people are around.

Another issue is that I feel guilty about always sleeping next to my daughter instead of my son and settling DD most nights- luckily DS adores his dad but it I feel so bad when we've tried to swap but end up giving in as DD won't stop crying until she's with me.

Haven't got much time to post but think the toddler NCSS is from age 2.

Thank you, have just ordered

Everything you've described sounds perfectly normal and sounds like she's a clever girl . If its any help we co-slept and they both made their way into their own beds eventually and they even like their Dad now .