Napping nightmare!!

[hodgiebreeder]

Hi all!

Yet again I am consulting the mumsnet jury....

DS has just turned 6 months and naps have become a complete nightmare. He has always resisted falling to sleep to a certain extent but now he screams, and I mean SCREAMS for up to 10/15mins before finally giving in to sleep. I find this really distressing as it doesn't seem to matter what I do I can't seem to save him from getting himself in a real state :(

As far as I can tell I am waiting for his sleepy cues (vacant staring, rubbing eyes etc) so it's not that he's not tired. If we're at home we then go straight up to the nursery, draw the blind and then the screaming starts! I have tried holding him, rocking, singing, and just putting him down but he just breaks his heart, bless him. I hate that he does this to himself and wish I could just help him drift off to sleep calmly. Up until recently he was able to do this in the sling or pram but today we had a massive meltdown in the buggy whilst out and about despite using a snoozeshade (which has been invaluable up until now).

Weirdly he is very good at bedtime and goes down with very little issue after bath and 7pm feed. I wonder if this is because we've had a consistent routine from day one? He then wakes only once in the night for a quick feed and then resettles with no problem. I just don't know why he can't do this during the day.

Anyone experienced similar or have any tips. Am I going to have to be a slave to a daytime routine? Should I try putting him down before he's tired? After a feed? Sell him on eBay?!?! Help!!!

Oh, also should've said...... I'd be very happy to rock him to sleep if that's what he needs but he's HEAVY and gets so upset, flailing around, pulling my hair, arching his back that I'm honestly scared I'll drop him...... Which I'm guessing won't stop the crying problem

Sell him on eBay!!

No advice really but have the same problem, I dont think quite as bad though.

I normally rock him while walking, sometimes I just give up and put him in his bouncer for a chill out with his dummy (occasionally hell even fall asleep in it, do e this tonight, decided I wasn't having the fight a few minutes in, put him in with dummy and telly on, went to loo and 5 mins later he's asleep!)

If he's just screaming at me I sometimes put him under his mobile, he keeps crying until he notices with a grabbing of the bits and (loudly) going look look!

Other things I try to help are music, lying down with him and the hair dryer.

Mines a 17.5lb 4 month old btw, arms just get semi used to him and he grows more

your so lucky yours goes down at night at 7 and only wakes once!! mine is 5mo and has about 2-3 feeds between 0000 and 0700 and will not go to sleep before this. she has started doing the screaming thing in the morning nap (despite having always gone to bed nicely for her morning nap all her life until this month)!!
i have to put her down and let her cry until she looks a bit more tired then pick her up and rock her a bit and then she will sleep. like you, i find this distressing and wish she would just drop off calmly. my back is killing me.
if you do put an ad on ebay..do a buy one get one free for me please...!!!

Thanks guys! Reassuring to know it's not just me. I guess we'll just have to (wo)man up to all their screaming, try not to take it personally and hope they grow out of it!! Good job he's so cute really, or he'd have been out with the recycling months ago

We has problems with naps from 4-6/7 months too. DD now 10 months and sleeping well for naps and at night. To some extent I think babies are learning how to do all this stuff on their own and we just have to wait for them to catch on, but maybe we can help them too. I had resisted a nap routine as I thought it was too much faff. But her not settling was even more annoying so I gave it a go.

The routine is - into grobag, close blind, lights low, read a few stories together, milk (dropped this at some point), cuddle, lights off, into bed. She also started napping at more regular times which helped as we introduced 3 meals a day.

I can't remember how long it took, but she did get there in the end and she often goes down without the routine now if I'm in a rush!

I think the screaming phase is something you just have to go through to help the baby learn that they can fall asleep on their own. I avoided rocking to sleep at all costs (unless DS was ill) because I didn't want him to become reliant on it.

To help you through it you could try the sleep routine suggesteD by crochet or some other method of relaxing your baby that suits you - I discovered that DS went straight to sleep with a dummy at 6months. Originally I was dead against dummies but now I think if it works go for it!!

It also helped me to think that the screaming would pass in no time at all wheras the skills DS was learning (ie that he can go to sleep on his own) would be with him for the rest of his life. And also to me its better to learn how to be a good sleeper while young than when he's 3 or 4 and likely to be far more affected by it.

Its so true what theplumfairy says. I spent so long worrying about her sleep - if I'd known it was a phase and wouldn't last forever I would have been so much less stressed out.

One other thought - we also put DD to play in her cot every day. Sat up with some toys. I read somewhere that this can help them associate the cot with nice things as well as crying. No idea if it helped, but it sounds sensible!

Goodl luck.