Deswaddling Nightmare

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Following on from my other thread (I seem to be starting thread upon thread atm), we are on day 2 of Operation Deswaddle with ds2 (6mo). Night times are still awful, with 4/5 wakings and lots of grizzling each time we put ds down in the cot. I am hoping that this will get better if we keep at it.

My question is about naps. In the swaddle he would do 45 mins, 2.5 hrs and 30 mins every day, no trouble at all. Out of the swaddle he won't nap for longer than 30 mins at a time, averaging 3/4 times a day. I know he's not getting enough sleep (either at night or during the day!) as he's almost constantly grizzly, screams his way through half the bedtime routine and cries in his sleep. Those of you that have deswaddled or have a lot of experience/knowledge about baby sleep, would you think the nap situation will improve if we persist?

I am so exhausted, I just need some support and reassurance that it will get better if we keep on with it.

Do you need to deswaddle yet? My ds was swaddled until about 9/10 months. I know they say you should stop swaddling when they can roll but ds was practically walking by the time he was fully unswaddled. He never moved much in his sleep and slept beautifully. I started swaddling over a gro bag, so arms only, at about 7 months using a large muslin. I'm trying to remember but I think he stopped at night first and became a tummy sleeper with his arms tucked underneath him so almost like swaddling!

Sorry if you have other reasons for stopping swaddling as not read your other threads. I just wanted to let you know that I had a swaddle lover and we held out a bit longer! Ds2 due any day and I'm desperately hoping he loves swaddling as it was a godsend!

moojie I wouldn't mind continuing the swaddle but no matter what we try, he gets out of it. We were using a miracle blanket, which he's massively outgrown and we continued to use it waaaaay longer than we really should have, and have tried a large sheet/muslin but he is such a big strong boy and he can get out of anything we try. He had also just started screaming when we tried to swaddle at night, after being perfectly happy with it previously, so we figured it might be time to get him out of it. Unfortunately it's not been a smooth transition so far

Thanks for your post though, and good luck with ds2!

Ok I understand. I remember now thatwe moved onto flannelette cot sized sheets to swaddle as ds outgrew his proper swaddle blankets. These had a bit of stretch to them so I could do them quite tight. Ds used to quiver with excitement when he knew he was going to be swaddled so that was never a problem.

Good luck with it and from experience of other sleep issues, consistency is the key. Decide a method and stick with it for at least a week before you decide it's not working. They all go through sleep regressions and I remember naps being a little problematic at 6 months anyway but once ds was more active and crawling/cruising he soon went back to the long naps if we were at home. Never quite cracked the sleeping in the buggy though!

moojie we've tried the same kind of cot sheets. Maybe my swaddling technique sucks, but whatever it is, he can get out!

Awful day today. He hasn't slept for more than 20 mins at a time and is absolutely exhausted. Currently crying in his cot. He is so tired he can't sleep. I don't really know what to do.

Google WOOMBIE - I've just got a large and mega baby convertible one for my 6 mth old swaddled addict!

gluttom we tried something similar here and it was worse than our current arms-free situation! He hated it. Thanks though!

Sorry to hear you are having a difficult time lookout

Is your ds rolling? How do you think he would sleep on his front? For my ds this was the compromise. He would slep on his front with his arms tucked underneath him so it helped him through the jerks. To begin with I used to get him to go to sleep any which way possible..milk/cuddles etc then turn him over. Very soon he was sleeping happily like this.

Just an idea?

He's not rolling yet, no. He hates being on his tummy when awake, which makes me think he wouldn't be too happy to find himself on his tummy when he woke up. I don't know though. I feed him to sleep too, only way to get him off to sleep with his arms free. I'm a bit concerned about trying anything that will make it worse.

Am I being naive to think that perseverence will make it all ok?

He will get used to it but so far he isn't used to dealing with the jerks that happen naturally in a babies sleep. It will take time for him to get used to them and for him to learn to get back off to sleep. I was encouraged to stop swaddling earlier but it just never worked and as soon as I swaddled he would sleep fine again. My ds was different though in that he clearly loved his swaddle so wasn't ready to stop.

Again only from my own experience but their sleep habits do change and every now and then need an MOT! It takes a few nights but we've always got there in the end. We went through another sleep upset at about 1 yr which took a couple of weeks to sort as was combined with illness. Now at 2.9 yr he sleeps very well. Its going to be a shock to my system with a new baby!

We found the grobags to be the only sleep bedding that worked post-swaddling. They give the babies more space than swaddling, but enough leg and body containment to feel a bit safer. I also returned to rolling blankets and tucking them down my kids' sides - again, it seemed to make them feel more secure without actually being swaddled and trapped.

I am sure it will change again soon but I really sympathise. I think transition times for sleeping and feeding are the toughest of all!

He practically passed out from exhaustion at bed time tonight!

What you say about the jerks makes sense as when he's fed to sleep and lying in my arms he does startle himself awake with the little jerks. I guess even though it's hard we have to do it at some point, and he clearly wasn't loving it as much as before, so we just need to grin and bear it I suppose.

I had a nearly 7 year gap between my first and this one - now that really was a shock to the system! Ds1 was a perfect sleeper, from 14 weeks he slept through with a dreamfeed and no swaddling. I hope you get a good sleeper, sleep deprivation is a killer!

Thanks so much for all your support.

kasbah we just bought grobags for the transition, and also because they were the cheapest 100% cotton ones I could find (ds has eczema). Haven't used them so far though.

After another dreadful day and night, with a meltdown (ds) and a breakdown (me) we have thrown in the towel. My darling dear husband found and we are trying it tonight. Ds2 of course went down with no trouble at all in this type of swaddle.

Maybe he just isn't ready?

sorry you are going through this! i am still swaddling mine, but she is kicking herself out too so have been looking at Woombies and other options. i hope you get some sleep soon.

i am thinking of using a grobag, and sewing the arm holes, to make her feel more swaddled but her arms will not be able to flail about as much.

jan my mum suggested a similar thing - finding a sleep bag with sleeves and stitching the sleeves to the side of the bag! The woombie equivalent didn't work for us, have throught about an ergococoon though.

The modified miracle blanket swaddle from the link above is working so far this evening. First time in weeks he hasn't squawked before 9!

im glad something worked. haven't heard of an ergococoon. will look it up. another thing i thought of was getting a simple babygro and getting my mum (sewing expert) to take off the arms and sew them together. her legs would still be unswaddled, but the top would be tighter than a grobag, and its mainly her arms that are the problem, plus i could put another blanket over her bottom half. - ill try the other options first though.

i am biding time really as she is in her moses basket in the cot, but her feet are nearly touching the bottom and we have tried moving her twice with no success...

let me know how you get on

We went from swaddle to Peke Moe then eventually to grobag. The peke moe worked for us DD still jumped in her sleep but didn't wake. In grobags she kept hitting her face & waking herself up but did take to them at @ 10 months. Might be worth a try. Good luck!

Heartbeep I had a thing like a peke moe but he hated it. He just can't get used to any freedom in his arms apparently. I'm hoping that in a couple months time he will be better and accept more esaily the grobag. Time will tell.

We still didn't have a perfect night but better than the previous three. I managed 3.5 hours sleep in a row, a kind of luxury for me! Hoping it will only get better.

Modified swaddle worked ok. One of his arms was free when I went to him at 6.30am after he'd been awake and chattering away for half an hour. But when we wrapped him last night, he was wriggling a lot so it wasn't a very tight swaddle. Will get better at it I guess. At least he didn't break out of it
completely as before.

when i go to dd in morning shes always completely out of her swaddle! im glad you had a better night hope it continues

jan Thanks, hope you find a solution too.