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Help in a real mess

8 replies

fikn · 19/02/2012 23:39

My ds is 10 weeks and has not slept in his cot once! He is sleeping on me or in our bed. He wakes every 2.5hours ( like clock work) to bf. my first ds was the same and at 15 weeks we used controlled crying to get him in his bed and sleeping. It worked a treat and only took about a week with longest night of controlled crying lasting 50mins. However this time I just seem to have got in a mess and I don't know how to fix it. First night he cried for four hours with us going in 5/10/15mins then sticking at 15. At 4 hours I fed him he passed out settled in his bed and then woke ever 2.5 hours to feed. Second night went to sleep after 1 hour slept for 45mins then woke up and all hell broke loose. Fed him after he woke he then screamed for another 2hours. I don't mind the regular feeding as I know this will sort its self out but I need to teach him to sleep in his bed as even though he loves sleeping on me near me it scares me and my poor husband needs to be able to sleep in a bed instead of the floor.
I found it so simple to read what my first ds needed and this time I just don't feel I do.
Any advice very welcome

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
1Catherine1 · 20/02/2012 00:06

My DD magically fixed herself at 17 weeks. Went horribly wrong at 9 months and now at 11 months I've had to sleep train.

Give it time...

clarejane · 20/02/2012 01:21

I am no expert but at 10wks he's probably just too little to be away from you, and I think sleep training is not generally recommended before 6mos. I think it's also recommended that they are in your room until that age too. If you're not comfortable having him in bed maybe one of those side-car cot things could work or just his Moses basket on the floor beside you. 10wks is really tiny and he just wants to be close to his mummy! What the last person said, give it time...good luck!

fridakahlo · 20/02/2012 01:27

Is there no spare bed that you or your husband could sleep in instead? You sound very pressured into getting him into his cot but if he is screaming for two hours then he is not ready. And baby snuggles are so precious and go away so quickly.

Parietal · 20/02/2012 01:29

Swaddling?

showtunesgirl · 20/02/2012 10:19

I thought CC was not recommended for babies under 6 months due to the amount or cortisol that gets released into the brain?

fikn · 20/02/2012 13:17

Oh dear lord now I am panicking - this is the way I tought my first to sleep as all my friends did the same under the guideance of NCT. Now I am in a real pickle as I thought that have him in bed with me is not recomended? surley its better for him to be in his bed next to me rather than on me?

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omama · 21/02/2012 21:04

PP is right its not recommended for babies under 6 months. Have you considered a more gentle approach than CC? Baby Whisperer technique sssh/pat may be more suitable for a baby of his age. The aim is to get baby settling to sleep independently in their own moses basket/crib/cot but without leaving them to cry. So you do your usual winddown, & when baby is sleepy you put them over your shoulder & you sssh past (not into) their ear & at the same time rhythmically pat their back (like the tick tock of a clock). This should calm baby & then you lay them down, all the time ssshing & patting (for back sleepers you can prop them on their side so you can continue to pat the back, or gently pat/apply pressure to the chest/tummy instead). And you carry on until baby is in a deep sleep (so you may need to keep going for a good 10mins after they go to sleep or they may jolt awake). Yes baby may cry, but you are right there to sooth him. If he is really upset you can pick him up, carry on with sssh/pat then when he is calm lay him back down. Gradually, as baby is asleep you can slow down then stop the ssshing, then gradually lessen the patting until you stop. Over time you can reduce the assistance & baby will self settle.

We did this with my DS at around 3 months b/c he'd gotten used to falling to sleep on me at naptime & it was a tough week while we did it, but boy am I glad we did it now, b/c ever since, I've been able to just pop my little one in his cot & he goes off to sleep by himself. And if he wakes in the night I rarely have to go to him because he knows how to put himself to sleep.

HTH.x

fikn · 22/02/2012 03:17

Omama - great advice had started that the night you wrote and we have a baby in his cot asleep which is great. It took a while to get him down but much calmer. Thanks

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