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2 year old difficult sleeper - hoping for solutions before new arrivals

5 replies

bigboobsatlast · 18/02/2012 15:04

My dd is just 2. She has nver been a great sleeper, but I was happy just to get on with things and deal with it. However, I am now 26 weeks pregnant with twins (!) and coping at night time is praying on my mind. Not sure how I am going to cope with a waking toddler as well as two babies. Also, I do not want dd to associate less attention from me at night (as dh will realistically have to deal with her if I am feeding two babies) with the arrival of the babies. Hence this post and looking for possible things I can do to improve things sooner rather than later.

DD goes to bed at 7pm after milk. She nearly always goes to bed fairly easily and is a sleep within 10 - 15 minutes. However, I do stay with her until she is asleep. I sit on the floor next to the bed - I don't talk to her and don't put my hand on her or anything, unless she does get upset - but thats not usual.

She is then usually asleep until around 1am when she wakes up and calls for me (does not usually cry). I go in (don't talk / put hand on her etc unless she is upset which she usually isnt) and lie her back down and put her covers back over her - she is then fast asleep again and I am back in bed within about 2 minutes. On a good night this happens twice - never exactly the same time but usually midnight/1am ish and then again 2 hours later I reckon.

If she is anything lesee than 100% then she will wake up more and may take longer to settle - but still only 5 - 10 minutes. I usually have a week of 'good nights' (ie only two wakings) but then she always seems to have a bit of a cough or cold or teething which means the number increases again, but then goes back to twice - even once if I am really lucky!

She has never slept through. She does not nap in the day. I have never even thought about any 'sleep training' techniques so dont have the first clue.

She sleeps in a bed which she loves.

She is going through a bit of a clingy stage, but this sleep issue has always been with us so don't think that is much of a factor.

If I did not have twins on the way I dont think I would be too bothered, but as it is I think I need to at least consider options to try and improve things.

Has anyone else got a similar toddler or any advice / suggestions? Is my dd particularly 'difficult' at night or is this the usual? I really don't know!

Sorry for long post, I hope I have explained the situation well enough.

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Bossybritches22 · 18/02/2012 15:07

Can you & Dh plan a week when he is off work so you can deal with this together. Would he do the nights for a while to help wean her off you?

Sometimes they are clingy to Mum but if they think they're only getting boring old Dad (sorry Dads!) they'll not bother.

Sounds like she is in a habit of waking, what would happen if you didn't go in?

Sounds like she's almost there as its not taking her long to drop off to sleep.

You are wise to try & get it sorted for when the DT's arrive-congratulations!

bigboobsatlast · 18/02/2012 15:12

Thanks for quck reply Bossy!

DH used to deal with a lot of the night wakings, but in the last 3 or 4 weeks she will only settle if I go in. When DH does go in she gets upset and it takes him 15 - 20 minutes to settle her - so nights are more disturbed - so I have tended just to get on with it! Do you think that if only DH went in for a few nights then she would just stop waking? It is possible and worth a go - but in my first trimester I was out of action and he did all the nights for about 5 weeks and it didn't make any different..... I am worried about makings things worse not better!

But you are right, waking is a habbit only - as she does not need me or anything else when she wakes.

OP posts:
Bossybritches22 · 23/02/2012 12:12

Hiya how's it going bigboobs ?

Grin < feels like I'm being very rude & personal calling you that!!>

bigboobsatlast · 24/02/2012 08:32

Hi Bossy. Well, by some miracle I seem to have had a breakthrough! For the last three nights she has only needed me once (woken more but self settled within seconds) and last night.... SHE SLEPT THROUGH!!!!!! I am really hoping this will be a trend but trying (failing) not to get my hopes up.

I HOPE that my new consistent and slightly tougher approach is working. I am still going in if she calls me (unless stope very quickly, which she does sometimes) - but consistently just lieing her down and covering her back up - no messing! So I am hoping, like you said, it is just a habit and that she is beginning to realise there is just no point in calling for me. Fingers crossed! I will be sooo happy if this really is the beginning of sleeping through. It has only taken two years Hmm

Thank you for checking on me!

OP posts:
Bossybritches22 · 24/02/2012 23:54

Well done, sounds like there's a fighting chance she'll be in a better routine for when the DT's arrive!

Plus now the evenings are getting a bit lighter more chance to run her around a bit after tea maybe to wear her out? Grin

Good luck!

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