9-11 month sleep regression?

[AllBellyandBoobs]

Hi, dd has never been a great sleeper, day or night time. Had got her down to one waking (well, she did it herself actually) which was easily sorted with a bit of patting. Then we had 3 weeks of sleeping 6.30-6.30! Then, at 8.5 months she got her two top teeth, then learnt to crawl/climb/cruise all in the space of a day it seems, and unsurprisingly sleep went to pot. Now we are 2 months further on at 10.5mo and things are just getting worse, she now no longer self settles at all and will only sleep (fitfully) in bed with me. I am exhausted as I don't sleep well with her at all. Any ideas/stories about how much longer this might go on for? Or anything I can do? I can not leave her to cry so that is out. I am prepared to sleep in her room on the floor if that'll help.

I thought the 4 month regression was bad. How naive!

No solutions I'm afraid, but I can sympathise as my almost-10-month old is the same. I've resorted to letting her fall asleep downstairs on the sofa as she screams at night in her cot whereas before she had learnt to self-settle. She seems ok for naps though. We're also co-sleeping but I'm hoping this is just (!) a sleep regression and will pass.

We did that last week as she was poorly but this week we've started sitting in her room with her. Took an hour for her to fall asleep. When this started i was very much of the attitude that we'd just go along with her but it is starting to tire me out now! Hope it turns around for you soon.

If you are happy to sit with her I'd keep that up for a while. We've just had to 'retrain' 11mo DD - which in our case involves leaving her be - because I too was struggling with the increased co-sleeping. She still struggles on the odd night but in the last three weeks I've co'slept' twice from about 5am otherwise she's been fine til 5.30 or 6 - a dramatic improvement!

Ah, you could have been me a few weeks ago, the teeth, the crawling/cruising, the lot. We're now at 11mo & it seems to have resolved. I'm not under any illusions that it was due to anything we did, although we did resort to a version of sleep training last week, but I suspect the improvement was just coincidence, but it did feel better to be trying something other than getting up countless times at night, and cuddling on sofa, or co-sleeping very badly (me not the dc).

Anyway just wanted to say hang in there.

Thank you both, it always helps to know you're not alone! Can I ask what versions of sleep training you used?

I know that I have got it better than you, in that DS isn't up multiple times in the night. But the 5:30am starts are beginning to take their toll!

How long did it take you, Comfortable? I am trying to work out how the heck I am going to get DS to start waking at a reasonable time again. If he'd co-sleep I would, but the bugger just plays in bed.

Wonder Weeks says that this phase can last for about 5 weeks. Another 3 weeks fills me with dread - currently going for job interviews etc and the thought of returning to work brings me out in a sweat!

Well the first time around at 5.5 months we did a not so gradual withdrawal. Went from trying all sorts of tactics to leaving her 10mins, then if required sitting in silence next to her til she dropped off. She started self-settling pretty quickly though I was still feeding in the night at the time twice then dropped to one.

This time around we just stopped going in at all unless she's crying hard - she has a tendency to whinge for quite a while and she was doing it at 4am and not responding well to anyone going in and trying to resettle by any means, and I can't cosleep as she wakes if I twitch my little finger. If she's crying hard we're back to sitting in silence but we've only had to do it twice.

Obviously when she's been poorly we've coslept or given calpol and cuddled or what have you.

Ps littlemilla ditto minus the job interviews... I dream of the 6.15 wakeups we had for 9 months. Still, i'd take 5.30 with no enforced out-of-bed periods over 6.15 with an hour up in the middle of the night!

fififrog I guess it's the lesser of two evils! I am just hoping that this isn't going to be his 'norm'. 10-11 hours is pretty good going and so maybe I am being too idealistic? Who knows, eurgh.

Yeah my mum said this morning "but she's sleeping for ages"... I think I never went to sleep before about 9pm - at least we have an evening and can get an early night!

I just started trying to bore her to sleep

When putting her to bed we did the routine as normal, but instead of sitting near & shushing/stroking forever I just lay her down, said g'night & left. She wasn't keen & immediately stood up, whinged a bit, and then wailed if left too long. So I just got on with some chores nearby (not in room) and kept going in & laying her down, but without any interaction.

I think the first night it took about 30mins. For 2 nights we had middle of the night wakings that were more painful - about 90mins each night - but I more or less did the same thing. I did/do pick her up occasionally though, as once she is properly wailing its the only thing which calms her down, but I then put her down as soon as she is calm[er].

She has had two more night wakings since then, but for specific reasons (dirty nappy & wardrobe malfunction) rather than just to play or for cuddles which is a massive improvement.

Great, both of those sound doable. Mine is a real screamer and can escalate very quickly so even if i was inclined to leave her to it I'm not sure the neighbours would appreciate it.

She's been poorly this past week but once I'm sure she's better then we'll work at improving things (just to find she'll get better in her own sweet time as usual). Thanks again

Sounds like we have the same child Good luck!