Questions on co-sleeping.

[AWimbaWay]

My older two children always slept in a moses basket next to our bed, then at 6 months went into their own room in a cot.

My youngest completely refused to be put down in a moses basket, or anywhere for that matter. I spent the first 6 weeks sleeping sat up cradling her but never felt comfortable or that it was safe.

I eventually discovered the co-sleeping cot and bought a bednest which was fab, even if I did have to sleep with my face pushed up against hers to get her to sleep!

Thankfully by the time she had outgrown the bednest she was sleeping much better and is now in her own room in her cot.

But, it got me thinking about co-sleeping, occasionally when they are poorly we still bring the children into bed with us. My youngest is in a gro-bag so we lay her in-between us so she can't roll out but on top of the covers so she doesn't overheat or shuffle down under the duvet.

I still don't sleep well though. I worry I'm going to roll over and squish her or that she'll get her head stuck under our pillows etc.

So, how do those of you who co-sleep long-term do it?

Do you have a low down bed so it doesn't matter if they roll out?

Do you go without pillows?

Do you go to bed at the same time as your child?

If not how do you ensure they don't just climb out of bed when you're not there?

Do you sleep well with them in the bed with you?

Just stuff I've wondered about and thought might help other Mums.

A nosey bump.

bumpety bump!

Thank you

my dd is 6mo and we co sleep she doesn't use a pillow but if she kicks herself up a bit she does like to snuggle one! She's also under the covers with me but it doesn't really go higher than her ribs. I'm not worried about her rolling off the bed as she is always in the middle of it.

Thanks, er1507, what do you do if you're not in the bed? Or do you always go to bed at the same time?

We do go to bed at the same time, but that's because DS has been so bad at sleeping that I have needed to be in bed for around 12 hours just to ensure at least six hours of (albeit broken) sleep.

However, now things seem to be improving; I am still going to bed at the same time, and enjoying being able to read for a couple of hours before sleeping, and yet getting enough sleep. Huge huge pleasure, and now for the first time ten months after DS's birth.

I have had some normal beds and some low down beds. DS never rolled out, or even attempted to. A pillow up against the edge of the bed helped.

No, I didn't go without pillows. DS slept a little lower down than me and once he was over 2yrs he slept on the pillow.

No I never went to bed at the same time as DS, I just put him to bed and he went to sleep earlier.

He didn't climb out of bed because when he went to bed he was tired and went to sleep. I read his stories and lay with him till he fell asleep when he was little, after that he would read to himself until he fell asleep.

I always slept very well in bed with DS, it was normal and I was used to it. He slept really well too. I was always aware of him and am a light sleeper and would never have rolled onto him. He didn't wriggle if I was there with him either, I tihnk my presence gave him comfort so we both slept well.

That's it really. Stopped co-sleeping gradually by the age of about 4.5, then at the age of 5 and 6 we went back to co-sleeping as we were homeless in temporary accomodation together with no heating over winter and we had to sleep together to keep warm. It was a lovely snuggly time, and I usually did go to bed with him then, as the rest of the house was so cold. We filled the bed with hot water bottles and I read for a few hours after he went to sleep. Good memories.

There was a recent thread the other day you might find interesting: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/1388733-Can-co-sleepers-answer-my-musings-please

Sorry don't have time to answer more now, be back later :)

Do you have a low down bed so it doesn't matter if they roll out? No. Ours was actually quite a high bed which is why I started co-sleeping in the first place. Couldn't get into bed holding DD after a CS.

Do you go without pillows? No. Bed is 6 ft wide, so pushed pillows to the outside of the bed so there was a gap in the middle where DD was. She always slept on top of the duvet under a baby blanket when she was very small.

Do you go to bed at the same time as your child? She went to bed with me when I did, until she was old enough to be left. As she was at nursery all day she had a long sleep there then I kept her up. Or she'd go to sleep on the settee.

If not how do you ensure they don't just climb out of bed when you're not there? See above. But used to BF to sleep anyway.

Do you sleep well with them in the bed with you? Yes if it's just the 2 of us. No if DH is also there because then I'm in the middle and they both encroach on my space.

Thanks for the link BertieBotts, I did a quick search but must have missed that, so recent as well.

Thanks for everyone's responses. I think having a bigger bed would help, when there's dh, baby and myself are all in our double together it always feels really cramped, but then I complain there's not enough room even if it's just dh and me.

We had a bedside cot which solved the space issue. Is the bednest very small? DS's was a normal sized cot and he fitted in it until he was around 2. If you have a cot with a drop side, one of the ikea ones which converts to a mini bed despite being cot size, or a cotbed, you could almost definitely convert it.

You could also get a bed guard to solve the rolling out issue.

I wouldn't personally use a grobag on top of a duvet, because duvets reflect body heat even if you're just on top of them, so I'd be worried they would overheat, but if you're that close you're normally aware, so I don't know.

We have a double and DS is 3 now, DP works nights, but on the rare occasion that all 3 of us end up in the bed at once it is a squeeze and DS is the only one who gets any sleep Normally one of us ends up squished into the cot or falling out of the edge!

no I put her in her cot for 7/7.30 and then if she wakes up before I go to bed then I'll settle her back intI the cot and then if she wakes up when I'm ready to go to then I'll bring her in with me or the next time she wakes. Your kinda aware of where they are in the bed even when your asleep, might be down to mothers instinct. I have a king size so it's a bit roomier but somehow dd still manages to take up most of the room even when it's just the 2 of us and she's little! I have lots of friends with toddlers that we're so intent on them sleeping in the cot that now when they want a little cuddle in bed the dc just aren't interested, so enjoy it :)