OK, I am all out of ideas. I challenge you to tell me something I haven't tried.

[Birdsnotbees]

I'm after some ideas. DD has been a rubbish sleeper since 3 months (she was sleeping through at that point). Basically, she resists all 'nice' attempts to get her to sleep. We have tried:

• Feed to sleep: she basically wants my boob in her mouth ALL night and screams the second it falls out. Result: no sleep for either of us.

• Co-sleep: she pinches me ALL night and screams if I move away. Result: no sleep for either of us. Same applies to my DH.

• Music: calmed her for a few weeks and she went off to sleep and slept through. And then it stopped working and no amount of Adele will get her back off. And I love Adele.

• Singing: ditto, worked for a few weeks til she got it sussed and now she screams if I open my mouth. Tbh, I'm no singer, I can't blame her.

• Shush/pat: ditto.

• DH: (in general): bloody ditto.

• Toy in bed/thing smelling of me in bed: a-HA! A useful device I can play with to keep me awake for longer. Suckers!!

• Pick up/Put down: well, this only works if the baby stops crying when you pick them up. Mine gets even more pissed off if you pick her up. She does not want comfort, goddamit, she wants to be AWAKE!

• Rocking gently: ditto. Though tbh more often than not I want to chuck her out the window by 3am so it's probably for the best.

• Pushchair: hello, this is the world's ONLY baby who won't sleep in motion.

• No Cry Sleep Solution: hahahahahahahaha

• Routine: oh she LOVES her routine, her bath, her snuggles, her bedtime stories. But it all stops the second I stick her in her cot, 1, 2, 3: SCREAAAAAM.

• Hippie amber beads (for teething): A fantastic waste of £25. Brilliant.

• Drugs/GP/bonjela: tried all of the above. Nadda.

She hates her buggy, she hates her car seat, she hates her cot, she hates my bed, she hates sleep (sometimes I think she hates me, although god love her she's cute when she has actually had some sleep).

So seriously, I'm all out of ideas. She's 11 months old. I'm sick of the crying. I'm pretty sure she is too, and it kills me that my baby is so clearly unhappy. Is there anything I haven't tried?

(If you have read this far, thanks for letting me let off steam.)

Oh crap, forgot one: CC. Goes against the grain but seeing as nothing worked with her, we tried leaving her for 5 mins, going back, leaving her for 5 mins etc. Worked like a charm for 2 weeks and then... you know what I'm going to say don't you?

Controlled crying? Going in after a minute, then 2, then 3 min etc? May work if the softer approaches aren't working. Its worked for some and it does for mine although h doesn't sleep through. ( 5 months)

Sorry x posted. Really don't know. Is she in pain or grizzley? Not really sure what to suggest sorry

Cheers shushshessleeping - me neither!! Tis very odd. Don't think it's pain - we do dose her up when we think she's teething but makes no difference.

The one thing you don't mention in your post is cc. I know that not every one is in agreement with it and it doesn't work for all babies. However, For my DD it did. It sounds like your baby is overtired which is why the stimulation of singing, rocking etc isn't working. My dd was the same, if she was tired and crying then the only way she would go to sleep was if we put in her cot and then left her, then go back in after 1 min, then 3, then 5 etc at whatever intervals you are comfortable with. The first night she cried for about 40 mins and then fell asleep, the second about 10 and thenthethird about 5. It worked for us and as horrible as it was that she was crying I knew that it was due to over tiredness and that no matter what I did (cuddling etc) she would cry. I recommend the book - healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by dr m weissbluch which I found really easy to read and a balancedview of sleep methods? Good luck.

Sorry X posted as well!

Thanks Teleaddict. I think you're right - overtiredness does definitely play its part, although even when she's had a (rare) good night or a decent nap, we repeat the screaming process. It's like she's angry - she fights it every step of the way. I just don't get it.

Had this myself,so after begging HV in tears she said cc is the way forward. And she said do it for naps in the day exactly the same. Ive read elsewhere its wrong but hey i was ready to try anything so in his cot he went one afternoon, an hour later after the checks it all went silent. Then we wondered if he was ok,but darnt check lol. He slept two and a half hours that afternoon and went to bed a dream with the same routine. She said stick to it every regression and it does work. Most nights he goes down great, like tonight he screamed when i left but once the stairs creaked and he had shut up before i got to the bottom. Its a horrid horrid way and by god was it hard but it worked and it would appear HV was right for us. However sleeping through can still be hit and miss and with us having arsey neighbours it can be difficult. You have my sympathy xx

Hiya. Totally feel your pain. My dd - almost 13 months has been a terrible sleeper. She just doesn't want to miss out on anything.
I had been feeding thru the night 3-4 times up until the end of oct. then thought - enough, so gradually stopped, would just try to shush her and get her back to sleep which usually meant cosleeping! Then thought had had enough of that when one night she just wouldn't fall asleep on the last feed of the night. So left her to cry. Now we had tried the whole gentle cc thing. Leave them for a minute then go in etc , no chance. She just got v rarked up and screamed even louder. So I went for the leave for ten minutes. Then in nd laid her back down, muttered something about sleep tight and see u in the morning (ha) and ran. Then left her for another ten mins. It took four going ins and that night she only woke once ( and took three going ins to get her back to sleep. It got better and better, even a few nights when she slept the whole night thru. God that feels good!
I stopped giving her a breast feed before bed three weeks ago and she even started settling herself to sleep after a brief squawk with occasional wake ups.
Now her blooming molars are coming thru, one thru and two more bubbling up and her sleeping has gone tits up again. Still not feeding her tho, but back to cuddling on the sofa and co sleeping. Am just hoping it will sort itself out once the teeth are thru.
She has never been the best napper either. I think some kids just don't do sleep that well, but they will get it. I do think leaving her for longer helped us, I really didn't think I would be able to, but it suited her and once those teeth are thru, it will be back on with it.
Ok, mammoth post, sorry, prob doesn't help either. Just hang in there, be gentle on yourself and it will get better xx

Sad truth about cc is that you have to keep re-applying it (or so we found.) As soon as something threw DC eg a cold, change to routine of some kind, we had to do it all over again. But it did work all over again! And again....

Oh i recognise this pure HELL
How about white noise??? This worked for a little while with my DS but from the sound of it you sound like you could do with 'a little while' working so you can plan your next attack approach!
We're currently using a couple of drops of lavender oil on my DS pillow and its working a treat.....for now....

Does your DD nap at all in the day? If so, when/how long for??? What time does she wake & when is her BT? And how long are you spending trying to get her to sleep each time?

It does sound like she may be in need of some sleep training to help her learn how to go to sleep independently rather than by feeding/co-sleeping, but just want to rule out routine being an issue first.

My HV recommended this book
"The Good Sleep Guide for You and Your Baby" by Angela Henderson and it did the trick for us (still using it).
I like the way it anticipates a lot of your questions and fears.
Gets good reviews on Amazon.

How old is she?

Dummy?
Swaddling?

Have you tried not trying to get her to sleep? Or the naughty thing of letting her fall asleep downstairs in front of the telly?

Reason I ask is this;

My DD was a terrible sleeper at times. When she was about your DDs age we were struggling. They are half way between communicating and understanding and not.

So, I used to bath DD get her all ready for bed by about 7. We then let her stay up with us, but it was pretty much quiet time, but put no pressure on her to sleep. We would potter about, DD would have a couple of quiet toys out, and every now and again when she looked tired we were offer for her to come and have a cuddle on the sofa. Sometimes it would be quite late, and I was lucky and diddnt have to go to work, but DD gradually started dozing off whilst cuddling on the sofa. The biggest thing is NO pressure. If she wants to get down and carry on playing, let her. Once she had fell asleep and was fast asleep we would carry her to her room. Sometimes DP would go to bed and I would stay up, sometimes on weekends he would stay up.

What we decided is they we needed to take all the STRESS out of going to bed. Eventually she was falling asleep by around 9.30.

We did end up doing a cross between gradual retreat, CC and CIO when she was around 20 months, to get her to fall asleep in her cot, but we felt she had a much better understanding by then, plus she no longer associated going to sleep with something horrid. And because of this it seemed to work very quickly (less than a week).

Nothing else has worked so far, so maybe just buy taking all the stress out, letting her figure her own sleep pattern, and learn that falling asleep whilst having a cuddle in a dark warm room, with the tv quietly on, it may just help you.

The key is don't force it. It needs to be nice for here.

DD is now a wonderful sleeper, asks to go to bed, and although she doesn't often nap any more, some afternoons she curls up on the sofa in front of a Disney film and says "mummy sleep now" and off she goes.

And I really think it's because she learnt that drifting off can be pleasant and not a battle ground.

Like I said, you may have to correct things later, but she will be able to communicate by then and understand it. And in the mean time we wernt arguing over it, and I started to enjoy her more.

Not fiemr everyone, but may be worth a try

Good luck!

Does she nap? My DS has not been the best sleeper but he does best when he's on a good, regular nap schedule. If she is overtired then a lot of stuff you're doing will just agitate her.

There comes a point when all the faffing around is counterproductive and just winds both of you up.

have you ruled out anything physical that might be making her uncomfortable when she's lying down?

Do you have any comfort items in her crib? You said you took out her animal because she was playing with it, but there's nothing wrong with that if she's quietly playing, it will help her drop off. DS has had a little lion to cuddle since he was quite young, sometimes he babbles to him for ages when he goes down but eventually he falls asleep.