6 month with horrendous sleep problem

[larlylou]

I've tried writing my message three times now and each time it just goes on and on so I apologise in advance for its length! I have a 6 month who is just the worst sleeper in the world and it is really dragging me down. I have a 2.9 year old who is superb so I have been spoilt and thought that she would just be like her brother...not the case. Three nights ago was the first and only night she has gone from 7pm and 7am and that was the night we decided to stop the use of a dummy (it has become a hindrance...on our hands and knees continually throughout the night scraping around for a piece of bloody plastic). She has a good night time routine which I've been doing with her since a week old - she has her bath, milk, story and in bed by 7pm. She settles well, sometimes needs a pat but generally asleep within 5-10 minutes. Throughout the night she will constantly wake crying (no build up...straight in to a full-on cry). We will leave her for 5-10 minutes to see if she will settle and occasionally she does but generally we will go up to her and once we are by her and sshhhhh or touch her she is reassured and will go back to sleep, move away from her or lift your hand off and the screaming starts. We are aware that its our company that she wants and she also relys on her dummy as she is extremely sucky. Sometimes giving her a dummy will rectify it for a period, other times you can't leave her side for ages. However, if we bring her into bed with us she is asleep, contently, in seconds. She wakes up every night at 8.30pm and between 10-11pm then 2ish, 4ish, 5.30ish (sometimes more, sometimes less - never the same but is getting worse). Sometimes if she wakes between 5.30-6am I will put her into bed with me just because I am too tired to get up with her due to such disturbed sleep. We have no qualms in leaving her to cry it out for a while and no longer worry about waking her brother up. She wiggles around the cot and gets in such a state sometimes when she is left that I tuck her into a folded cotton sheet to hold her down slightly otherwise she ends up twisting around and wedging herself.
She is also a terrible sleeper during the day too - never going longer than 20-45 minutes - rarely does she ever go longer and usually when in either a buggy or car (and hasn't done since a newborn). I try and make sure she has a few naps making her total hours of sleep to approx 3 hours (I do not think she is getting anywhere near good sleep during the day and is often rubbing her eyes when she wakes up) again, I have left her to try and settle back, gone and tried to pat her back but to no avail - once she's awake she's awake.
She does have eczema and pulls at her neck area which obviously is an irritant to her but I don't believe that could be the cause of her wakings. She suffered from terrible stomach pains whens she was little so we couldn't leave her to cry too long and had to do a lot of massage to ease her pain (not quite colicky as not regular timings but suffered from dreadful trapped wind and stomach pains). Has an intolerance to sugars so check her foods but don't think this is a problem either.
Any advice, suggestions, help would be so gratefully received as I just don't know what to do. I do not know if controlled crying is the answer and how do you do that when you semi rely on a dummy? Anyone experienced/experiencing anything like this? I'm ready to camp out in the garden for some sanity if I don't get this resolved soon. Thanks in advance!

I think I am going to have to try and break the co-sleeping and do controlled crying (I have been reading it up in Dr Green's babies book). It is quite similar to what we try to do now its just a question of continuing it. I am back to work in 3 weeks so I need to have some decent sleep and she is to share a bedroom with her brother and can't do that until she sleeps better. Starting tonight so I'll let you know how it goes!

why dont u put her cot back in your room for a while she will hear your breathing so she might sleep better noin your in the room i dont agree with sleeping with babies as they pick up things so quick and it will be so hard to stop it my sil done it and her ds was 5 before he would sleep in own bed

Kasdie - she is in our room at the end of our bed. She isn't sleeping well enough to share with her brother. I don't particularly agree with co-sleeping generally but with her and for some sanity it worked but, like you say, it certainly isn't a habit I want to get into as I too can see her being in there until she is far too old! We started controlled crying tonight and so far, so good.

Having same difficulties with my 9mnth old ds. There is no consistency in his waking. Also has Eczema. Slept like an angel until 4 mnths old. Contracted a virus and cut first two teeth and has been all down hill since then. Have also been cosleeping. Sick of it. Am trying controlled comforting at the moment but unsure whether to still bf during night as some days he is refusing all solids. Worried that on these days he is waking hungry? Have no idea whats going on in that little clever mind!!!

My dd is 7.5 months and has never been a great sleeper. We were cosleeping for a few months (with dh kicked into spare room for fear of rolling!) but for the last couple of weeks she has slept in her cot in her own room all night. She still wakes every 2 hours for a feed so I am in no position to be giving advice, but just to say that cosleeping for a while doesn't necessarily lead to a habit that can't be broken.

Thirdtimeround - do you feel he eats enough to be able to fill him up to get through the night and that night feeding is now more of a habit? A friend of mine has a 10 month old who has dreadful habits (she would feed her porridge at midnight thinking she may be hungry...?). The HV told her to get her husband to offer her water instead of her feeding her (breastfeeding) as at that age it is more habit than necessity. Co-sleeping is all really lovely for some cuddles and comfort (for both parent and child) but, like you say, I get sick of it as I never have a good sleep for worry that she may not be breathing. We are into night 2 of our controlled crying. Last night wasn't too bad and she did get teh gist of settling herself back to sleep but then my ds woke up and that set her off - she did get back to sleep and was up at 6am (which isn't too unreasonable). Hope tonight goes a bit better. Hope you all have a bit of a decent sleep tonight - aren't they just all monkeys! Butter wouldn't melt in the mouth by day, by night...the devils are out!

Yes, even though he doesn't eat a variety of food he does eat a sufficient amount most days. I do think that he feeds during the night out of habit. Have offered him water of a night as well. We live in Australia, so summer is quite hot. He is happy to drink water, but it doesn't settle him of course like a breastfeed. My 2.5 ds was still having a bf at 18 mnths during the night until I did cc with him. So it is definately habit. Love bf but speak to mums of bottlefed babies nearly all sleep 12hrs a night.
Our cc is going ok. But already exhausted by it!!!

Poor you. CC certainly knocks it out of you. I can appreciate your problem with regard to the heat, my brother is in Sydney and they had trouble settling their baby at night times (she ended up doing cc too as was exclusively breastfed, in fact, she ended up going into a maternity hospital for them to help her it was that bad). All was good last night, she woke several times but was able to settle herself back to sleep and 9.40pm was the last I heard from her until 6.30am so its worth doing! Good luck with your cc thirdtimeround

Congrats Larlylou! That is a huge achievement. I think the whole objective of cc is to get them to resettle themselves and you've done that. We are still soldering on but gave him a bottle last night instead of a bf at bedtime only woke once during the night for a feed and resettled himself a few times. Much better than before. Actually feel quite human today. Its just nice to know that there are other mums out there who understand.

How are you doing thirdtimeround? Ella again awoke a couple of times early evening but settled herself again and woke at 6am (I don't mind that too much as long as I get a good run of 4-5 solid sleep hours). Took quite a while to settle last night though. Just found out today that she is allergic to egg. Went all Nutty Professor looking bless her, scared the hell out of me. All better now, swelling all down and rash cleared but Doctor said she can't have any egg until she's about 2.

Hi not doing too badly. Have found that leaving and re-entering the room is causing major hysterical episodes from ds to the point of not being able to resettle without picking him up. Stayed in the room with him last night at bedtime. Didnt rock or pat or talk or even make eye contact. Fell asleep and didnt wake at all until 3am at which point I gave him a feed. I am trying to wean him at the moment have only dropped the bedtime feed. Will leave the nighttime feed until last.

You must have been scared to death when she swelled up. I dont have any problems there because my ds will only eat yoghurt, pureed fruit and rice cereal. Have tried everything wont have it. Cheeky monkey.
Isnt it nice to feel partially with it with a half decent nights sleep!!

Pleased to hear that its getting better ttr. You're right, a decent nights sleep makes all the difference. I sneaked off to bed at 10pm last night and awoke thinking it was about 1-2am and alas it was 5.45am. I felt really refreshed having a good length of obviously very deep sleep. So far no crying which is good. It is so hard leaving them sometimes. She would cry moreso by going in and out so in the end I made sure I kept out for a good length of time, within that time she usually settled herself and has now got the hang of it.

Her reaction freaked me out and am only relieved that it didn't worsen. I am totally hacked off with my Doctors. I phoned them to ask for help as I didn't know what to do and the Receptionist said that the Doctor would call me back. I phoned at 11.20am and the Doctor didn't call back until 1.10pm. I am going to put a complaint in tomorrow.

I would be totally annoyed by the doctors slow response to. What if something serious had happened. Here in Australia we have a service provided by the Hospital that will deal with things like that and you can speak to a rn or doctor pretty much straight away. Always ring there instead of my doctor. Sometimes I feel like he just thinks Im a paranoid mother. Might try and leave ds to cry a bit longer. Dont want to get stuck in the rut of having to stay until he goes to sleep until he is in highschool!!!!

She has allergies, please post for advice on the allergy thread. As a atopic baby there are all sorts of different times you should introduce certain food - which are miles different from non allergic children.

Also if you are trying to make a difference to her sleep then introducing new foods at the same time will give very confusing results.

Thanks Bobby for your advice. I will have a look on the allergy site. We aren't really doing controlled crying anymore as she has sorted herself out and she only cried for a short period anyway (10 mins). She awakes a happy baby of which I'm sure is due to having a good nights sleep.