Daytime sleep problems

[Lea2003]

I know this is probably not the first time someone has asked this but dd s only 4 weeks old. I am getting conflicting advice off everyone about sleeping. She is not too bad at night (4 1/2 hrs) then wakes for about 2 hours and will then drop off for between 1/2 hr and 2 hrs. However in the day she will not go down for a sleep. We havenot managed to get her to fall asleep awake - she just screams and I hate the idea of controlled crying. We tend to cuddle her asleep and then put her in her cot (moses basket didn't work ss she flails her arms around hits the basket and wakes up.) She is b/f and feeds on demand - 1-2 hourly in daytime. We have tried taking her out in pram but the last few times she screamed the whole way.

Any suggestions please?

Hi Lea2003, congratulations on your new arrival. These first few weeks are hard, trying to establish a pattern or routine,etc. My DS (now 4.5 months) also had lots of problems sleeping in the day, particularly in the beginning. We found swaddling the only way to keep his arms from waking himself up. Do you do this?
He too went straight into his cot after lots of cuddling and rocking, asleep. This didn't change until about 12wks when we felt we could be stronger about changing his habits and he was used to life "outside". We found the hair-drier soothed him to sleep (ended up getting this onto cd, can't live without it! ). Others have said tumble driers or a particular song have helped. DS didn't take to his push chair until he was about 3 months old, but in hindsight it might be because I didn't get him out in it enough. Fresh air also helps send them off.

I'm sure you'll get some more advice, however, here's another thread with some suggestions. HTH

Lea, how is your dd's weight gain? How is the bf going? Maybe she's hungry. If you're worried at all try the NCT breastfeeding counsellors on 0870 444 8708. I found them v. good. Lots of good advice on bf on mumsnet too. It does sound like something might be bothering her.

Cuddle her to sleep, she is only 4 weeks old, don't rush it!

Thanks for the replies. She is putting on weight fine - now 9lb (birth weight 7lb 7oz) and seems to feed constantly in daytime and evening. Am trying to cuddle her to sleep but she only sleeps for 30 mins max at time before waking after her initial 3 hrs - that is all she is sleeping for now. It seems to be getting worse!! I think she may have colic as well but I'm told it will only last until 3 months!

Not sure what else to do really - I just get concerned as she has huge bags under her eyes - surely she will eventually tire herself out and sleep or will she get ill?

She will be fine, both my boys have been like this - more interested in the world than sleeping. They are both very bright, so my theory is that its a good sign

She will sort herself out over the next few months but in the meantime don't beat yourself up. Do whatever is needed to make her sleep - take her for a walk, use a sling, try the tumble dryer or hairdryer, cuddle her, use a dummy.

THe other useful bit of info is that when a baby gets too tired it becomes harder for them to sleep. Try to catch her every two hours after she wakes in the day and encourage her to sleep, with whatever method works.

What ever method you use now is not set in stone, you can change things when she settles down.

I totally agree with kaz - in the first few months you just do whatever it takes whether it's rocking in your arms, taking out in the pushchair, singing to them, lying them on your chest etc. I was a bit worried that forever rocking my dd to sleep would mean that we were stuck with that method, but then at about 3 months she managed to put herself to sleep once or twice (having been made drowsy by me first) and I took that as my cue to teach her to put herself to sleep, so we then left her to cry a couple of times at her nighttime bedtime. It took 10 minutes of crying on two nights and from then on she put herself to sleep after a breastfeed from me.

So ... until a few months, just help your dd to sleep however you can. Try a breastfeed and then a push in the pushchair. Or continue with your cuddling or rocking her to sleep. These habits don't have to continue for ever, so don't worry. And sometimes babies just cry and there's nothing you can do - I got desperate so many times with my dd screaming her head off for hours on end every evening (call it colic or whatever you like), but it does get better. You barely notice it, but gradually they turn into more reasonable creatures!

And congratulations on your baby!

Do whatever it takes. Cuddling a baby is NOT a crime!! She sounds a very normal 4week old BTW. And congratulations!

My son was a terrible daytime sleeper as a small baby, though not bad a night. Agree with what others have said - did rock mine in a pram to get some peace - everyone said don't do it, but can't say it caused any long term problems.....

Agree with Kaz, keep a close eye after your babe has been up for 1 1/2 - 2 hours - for irritability, eye rubbing, yawns - that might suggest sleepiness, then use your preferred method to get her to sleep. Babies can get overtired as you say then they push themselves beyond sleeping.
Tracey Hogg's book secrets of the baby whisperer had lots of useful stuff on understanding your baby's body language that I found really useful, and I did find the Contented Little Baby Book by Gina Ford useful in guiding me for instance to look for tired signs after 2 hours. She is contentious so up to you whether you want to use her routines etc but there may be bits in both or either book that work for you.
Congrats on your new little bundle!

Thanks for all your replies. We have had a lot of windy/colicky problems over the weekend and Infacol has helped. She even slept for 3 1/2 hours in one go last night (that is after waking every half hour and screaming on Friday night!) Today we went out shopping and after a while grizzling she went to sleep - she has now been asleep for about 4 hours and doesn't want to wake up!! Can't wait until tonight!

From listening to you guys I have relaxed loads and am a bit more prepared to go with the flow - after all she has to sleep sometime.

Thanks

Just to add - don't worry it will all pass. I don't think you need to worry about habits etc until 3 months. My ds had colic but it passed by 8 weeks. I hope that you manage to get enough sleep yourself and just hang in there - everything gets easier.

hi first time talking. avid follower of gina ford worked great untill she turned 12 mnths then refused her morning nap and only sleeps 45 mins at lunch time very irritable baby and very tired mam.Please help partner no support