safe co-sleeping, any tips?

[indicababy]

I am 32+2wks pg. I intend to bf my lo and would like to co-sleep to give me a chance of actually getting some rest but have fears of squashing baby/baby rolling off etc. I'd like to hear others experiences of co-sleeping and what worked for you. My DH is a bad sleeper and we are quite use to not spending alot of time sleeping in the same place, especially since pregnancy as I waking /turning alot! So the bulk of the time I think it would just be me and baby in the bed! x

I co-slept quite a lot with my two, bf them both. we've a king-size so babies went in the middle with us both on the edges, plenty of room and we both were light sleepers, never drank etc

I had a great HV who was v sympathetic to the needs of bf my hungry babies who ate every 90mins day and night for 1st 3-4 months!!

I use a BabyDan bedguard (and our bed is a mattress on the floor) so I don't worry too much about DD rolling off. She is 1 now (and can climb off the bed, the little bugger) but when she was tiny I was very anxious to begin with. I think you sort of have to go through that personalised anxiety and come out the other side - it helps you realise whether co-sleeping will work for you or whether you're always going to be rigid with fear and will sleep better with the wean in a basket. Sorry, that's very waffly! Good luck with it all.

I also had a great HV who said although she couldn't officially recommend co sleeping she'd done it with both of her children.
With DD she slept between me and a breastfeeding pillow with me curled around her - on my side, knees up arm above her head. I understand it, it is nigh on impossible to roll onto baby when feeding on your side this way (it's also a little uncomfortable!)

I am still co sleeping with DD now DS is here so I have invested in the cosatto bedside cot. Money well spent! DD is on one side, me in the middle and DS on my other side. I still sleep with him as I did DD but he has a whole cot to spread out into and I can put him in there when he's asleep.

I love having them both in bed with me and they are always excited to see each other in the morning too.

Good luck!

You can read about it on the UNICEF website and there's a summary leaflet here.

Three in a Bed is definitely worth a read.

We put the mattress on the floor so we didn't need to worry about bedguards. If you're bf'ing, not drinking / using drugs and not ill, you're very unlikely to roll onto the LO. It's not advised to put them next to another adult until they're 18 m.o. IIRC as other people are less aware of them.

I sleep in the classic co-sleeping position which stops them moving up under the pillow and stops them wriggling down and getting their head covered.

I still co-sleep with my 2 y.o. and it's lovely. He likes his own space now though which is very nice.

I'm not sure your premise is right that co-sleeping actually gives the mother any longer or better quality sleep than having the baby in a nearby cot.

Logically baby would pretty much get in the habit of snuffling towards boob and barely wake the mum thus giving mum lots more reat than if she climbs out of bed to pick babe up.
However this so much depends on the baby so just seem to click with it, others need lots of help to locate and latch.

Helen Ball at the Sleep Lab at Durham University has done research that suggests mothers do sleep better if co-sleeping - your sleep cycles adjust to become the same length as your LO's and you don't fall into the very deepest sleep so it's easier for you to rouse. I think there are links to her work from the Unicef link above.

I agree that how well the LO can latch themselves makes a big difference though. DS still can't position himself and latch on without assistance at night and he's had 2 years of (frequently waking) practice.

Thanks for all your advice, I have just started reading 3inabed. It sounds like most people have had positive experiences of co-sleeping so hopefully mine will be too x

We took the side of the cot bed off and had the base on the same level as our bed. At about 5 months they turn on their axis so can end up kicking dad in the head unintentionally. I recommend it. I think I was a lot more rested then people who have their lo in another room. Plus loved the morning cuddles..

co-sleeping with baby no 3 at the moment. I always have the baby's head (facing me) cradled on my elbow, so I know it can't migrate towards pillows. I lie facing her, with my other arm over the duvet so it can't migrate upwards. For whatever reason, I seem to lie very still when co-sleeping so everything stays in place. Each time she wakes to feed, I roll to the other side (clasp baby to chest and roll, so you turn to the other side together).

I've coslept with both mine. I tried the traditional cot thing with dc1 and very quickly found I got much more sleep with him next to me. DC1 did fall out of bed once so now I put spare pillows on the floor in case the worst happens. The risks for cosleeping are different, but no greater than cot sleeping- as long as you don't smoke, and kick your dh out of bed if he's had a few too many (I'm guesing you won't have, as you'll be bfeeding). Dow dc2 is nearly 2, I have no concerns at all - he'd soon let me know if I was squashing him, and constantly kicks the covers off!

Love your name op,

We do baby in the middle of a king size.

As other posters have said keep pillows and thick bedding away from baby's' head.

I sleep with my right hand under my head to prop myself facing ds2, if he needs to nuzzle I'm right there.

you too viva. thanks for advice x