helping a 7 year old fall asleep on his own

[rubyredrose]

I'm embarrassed to admit that I have failed to enable my almost 7 yr old to fall asleep on his own. Many a night I spend standing by his beside for up to an hour thinking about how much I've still go to do before I get to bed. He's hungry, thirsty, scared, sees ghosts, doesn't like the dark - you name he's come up with it. I've tried sleep training, withdrawal, bribes etc but have failed. As I have a lodger I'm loathe to try the `let him shout the house down' approach.

Any practical tips would be most welcome.

He's seven - I think you just have to be firm! I don't mean to be mean but it sounds a little like he has you wrapped around his finger. You need to let your lodger know there might be a few nights of disturbances and get on with it. He's old enough to know that he should be able to go to sleep on his own. Make sure you have all the possibilities covered first - night light, water, snack before bedtime etc, then be firm. Talk to him about it. Rewards if necessary.
Sorry I don;t think there is an easy answer. I am doing this with my 3 year old and she's getting it. At 7 he should be able to get it too.
I hope I'm not speaking out of turn. I do feel your pain, but it's crazy that he's ruining your evening like this....

you're right thanks for the pep talk and reminder of who's in charge. Will get to it this week.

How about a story CD? My DCs all go to sleep with a story or classical music CD playing, which seems to help settle them.

Disclaimer: I am not promising this will work, my DSis tried it with her DS and he stayed awake to listen to the end of the story then came downstairs looking for her

Ruby, my DS (9) is the same.....if we want him to go to sleep in his own bed we generally have to lay with him. We have to get him in bed about 7 to start the bedtime routine as it takes him hours to go to sleep - he tries every trick in the book, his trump card being saying he is scared but to be honest, he is and I hate leaving him like that!!

We have tried just letting him cry it out but he has been known to go on for hours and he just gets louder and louder....I have no idea what to try next...apart from to buy a bigger bed!

give him a routine before bed time and make sure you stick to it.. keep strict timings so he always has a bath at the same time, reads at the same time, and also keep away anything electronic at least an hour before bed? hope this helps! :)

For scared of the dark how about leaving the landing light on and his door open? Then turn the light off when he's asleep. I still don't like sleeping in total darkness, and when I was a child I had the landing light on outside my door until I was really quite old...

Also books on tape (or CD I suppose now!) worked a bit for me, worth a try, especially as I used to listen to ones where I knew the story off by heart (from car journeys etc) so it was just the voices making me go to sleep rather than focusing on the story.

On the other hand, with my brother my mum used to just say he had to stay in bed. He could read as long as he liked as long as he was quiet and didn't get up. Worked for him too cos he naturally needs less sleep than other people (and my parents still got their evening together!)

Ah, also feeling your pain. My eldest has given us years of this to punish us for controlled crying as a toddler but what worked for us, from about the age of 6 or 7, was letting him listen to his cd stories until he falls asleep (it rarely takes that long), also letting him create his own schedule in the run up to bedtime (in which he makes time for all the things he used to pester for after bedtime), and reading to him before lights off.