Ok I give up, how do you put a 9am old and a 3.5 yr old to bed??????

[LoveBeingAFirework]

It's always been something ive wondered about and now I'm here I still don't get it

Grr iPhone - ds is 8 wks old

How do you mean?
What routine do you have?

I'd bath both of them together, have the babies things ready in the bathroom and dry them and get them dressed in there. Put baby on floor with toy and sort out other child.
Get older child to find a story book to read while you're heating milk/beginning to feed, and then all snuggle up and have a story together. Once story is done, and feed is finished ask older child to find another story you can read together just the two of you while you put the baby to bed.
Put baby to bed, read book with older child, have snuggles and a chat etc and then put older child to bed.

This is what I'd do anyway, I childmind children of those ages and getting the older one involved helps massively. Makes them feel important and that you will give them special 1-1 attention when the baby has been dealt with.

x-posted, I look after a 9m old and 3.5yr old. Similar theory for a younger baby, just have bouncy chair handy while you're sorting out the older child.

Yeah pretty much what squishy said is how we've done it since DD was about 3 months. She's now 13 months & DS is 3.10. Good luck

Mine are the same age as yours. I dunk dd2 in dd1's bath, get her dressed & changed, dd1 out & pyjamas on to read stories in my bed while I feed Dd2. Dd2 into Moses basket to cry doze off while I tuck dd1 into her bed. Back to dd2 & cluster feed until she falls asleep about 2 hrs later . If DP is around there is a lot less crying.

How's it going?

Same age gap also between mine (youngest now 18m) and I remember it felt like a nightmare! Pulled in both directions and sometimes with us all crying :(

It took what felt like ages for ds1 to adjust to being on his own while I settled the new baby. DP was away for 5 weeks too so it felt crazily hard.

But it did happen and they both got the hang of it eventually, pretty much like RillaBlythe, except I used a favourite dvd for ds1, which seemed to keep his attention for longer. Reading all together just never seemed to work for us, but ds1 & I had reading time together when ds2 was asleep, though it did get interrupted at times!

My best tip is to make sure the eldest knows when their prime one on one time with mum is, and to try and make it regular every day. It is hard, but it can really help them transition.

DS1 is now at school and they both go down together, ds2 without boob, which I never in a month of sundays thought would ever happen!

Really good luck! Oh, and record your favourite programmes that you're likely missing and have a glass of wine waiting!

I like that idea of regular one on one time with mum, SleepSchmeep. it's so easy to drop that in all the fuss of everything else that needs to be done. I think that's what makes me sad about our new bedtimes - partly all the crying! & partly that it used to be such a nice time with DD1, snuggling up in bed reading her stories. I need to find another slot in the day for her.

Yes, and it is really challenging when you remember to carve out some 1 on 1 time and something else gets in the way, usually a baby crying! But if you remember to look for opportunities, and grab them when they are there, it all helps.

I also 2nd getting them to help if they can/want to. Ds1 was great with this.

I still morn the loss of the bedtime routine with just ds1(especially after such hard work setting it up in the first place!). Now we do his school reading after tea, which is important but not quite the same. Ds2 isn't quite into bedtime stories yet, books still seem to be more of an activity in the day iykwim.

I can't wait for the time when they both want a good chapter of something, tucked up in bed - all in good time! I guess the important thing is they will pick up a passion for reading, whatever and whenever. That's what they need.

Hope OP is ok!