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I don't know what I'm doing - please help with sleep in 7 week old

3 replies

benne81 · 04/11/2011 21:40

Hi I'm looking for a bit of advice regarding my 7 week old, I don't have any family close by and i really don't know what I'm meant to be doing as there is such conflicting advice and people I meet seem to be either in the - 'rountine from one week' or 'never bothered with a rountine' camp. I would like to be somewhere inbetween and I have been relying a bit on him getting himself into his own rountine as he gets older but this doesn't seem to be happening and I'm having lots of self doubt about whats the best thing to do.

There basically doesn't seem to be much of a rountine at all at the moment - my husband gets home from work and wants to play with him so he gives him a bath and then he tries to give a bottle of breastmilk which sometimes he takes sometimes he doesn't (then I breastfeed). We used to try and do this about 7ish but it has been pushed back to 8pm. We then put him in the moses basket (in the lounge with us - as the guidelines say he should be in the same room as us for all sleeps) he usually falls asleep whilst breastfeeding and then I put him in the basket but he wakes up usually withint the hour and then I feed and try and get him to sleep all evening. The maximum consceutive hrs he has slept are 3 and there doesn't seem to be much rountine - eg. last night was a bad night and he woke up every hour. It feels at the moment everytime I put him down in his basket he wakes up.

What should I be doing - I try to take him out everyday so he becomes aware of day/night. I feed on demand and sometimes even now I'm feeding hourly. He sleeps inthe day but usually not more than 3-4 hours total.

I don't know what I doing and how much rountine I should be installing. My husband doesn't think you should impose any rountine on the baby yet - but then he isn't getting up to feed him all night. He also doesn't think we should put him in the bedroom to go to sleep at night (after bath/feed) and should take him to bed when we go (as the guidelines seem to insinuate). I also get really annoyed as he would play with him all evening given half a chance and bounces him round the room instead of trying to settle him - I seem to spend all evening saying 'don't stimulate him too much'

I bought the more stricter rountine books but I don't understand how you make a baby breast feed to rountine - do you just ignore him when he cries for food and is putting his hand in his mouth until it gets to the alloted time?

I'm keen to hear peoples experiences and if you have got a rountine how you got there. Sorry for the long message.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
fivegomadindorset · 04/11/2011 21:47

YOu are doing great.

DS used to cluster feed about this stage which was anything from every hour to 3 hours from about 7pm on, but what we used to do was put him to bed in our room and then go up and feed, it would usually end up with me being up there all night.

Could you perhaps come to a compromise with your DH, have him sleeoing downstairs but no play time after bath as this will confuse him.

DD got herself into a routine pretty much from the start, DS was ery erratic and exhausting.

happyfrankie · 04/11/2011 21:49

6 months ago I was in exactly your position. All I can say is you are doing brilliantly. Let your dh enjoy his evenings with his ds. He will start going to sleep at a reasonable time soon. Cluster feed and enjoy your baby, bad habits don't start yet, xx

JoinTheDots · 04/11/2011 21:50

DD got herself into a routine on her own at about 12 weeks. Before that we were a lot like you. At 12 weeks she clearly wanted a longer stretch of sleep from about 8, and stopped waking hourly, sleeping for 2.5 or 3 hours before we took her up to bed.

Strict routine followers would probably say yes, ignore hunger cues or distract until the "time" and some babies are ok with this. some are not, you need to decide what works for you.

It is good to have a routine at bedtime though, bath, feed in quiet place, songs until asleep. Or whatever. It sets you up for when they are a little bigger and get it a bit more.

I am sure you are doing fine responding to your baby, they are still very young, I hope you fine a middle ground that suits you all soon.

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