help!

[Alex1984]

Please help i am not sure what to do. My ds is not sleeping at all in his moses basket.
He is 10 weeks old today and is now 7lb 10 (was prem and spent 4weeks in nnu). I felt so guilty about everything that hapened that if he cried i would hug him immeadiately and at night bring him into our bed and now he wont sleep anywhere else. Not sure what to do. We stilp feed every three hours overnight which is fine because of his size?but i just really want him to sleep in his moses basket as i am petrified when he is in bed with us.
Dont think i would be able to do controlled crying does anyone have any other suggestions?

Thanks.

My son was born v similar weight tho not premature, and is now 10 weeks old too. He had awful colic and would not sleep anywhere but on me (the only place he found comfort I guess). A few times he shifted in the night, but a couple of weeks ago he 'fell' down the side of me and I woke to find his face close to the mattress. I freaked out and since then havent had him in bed, I kept comforting him in my arms, and when he quietened down, would stuff him in his cot. Kept doing it and doing it and seems to have worked, he now does sleep in there at night. Tho initialy at 'bedtime' may take several goes to get him off to sleep in there still. Took countless times the other night for whatever reason. Was at it for 3 hours!! But forced self to persevere. He also feeds every 3 hrs, sometimes 2 at the moment, think he's comfort eating due to colds- I try not to worry and figure as he gets bigger he will go for longer. So this would be my suggestion for your son, but I dont count myself an expert...just know it's the only thing I personally could do in the end as could not sleep with him any more. Now I have probs in the day getting him to sleep anywhere but on me, in sling, outside. He seems to want to be awake but is obviously knackered and should be kipping. Again I keep trying - what's that MN phrase ''this too shall pass'? Eventually it will for you, he'll sleep in his cot (if that's what you press for) and in a few weeks I think you'll be on to the next 'thing' and this current 'mare will seem a dim and distant memory. Enjoy your son, bet he's lush and has some lovely smiles lined up for his mummy x

Just remembered you said moses basket- do you have something bigger lined up for him yet?? Have heard some mums say their babies wouldnt get on with the basket- maybe he's outgrowing/outgrown it now...hopeam being a help to you and you get some worry free sleep soon x

Blimey read your post again and realise your son weighs now what mine did at birth! Sorry alex! You've been through the mill by the sounds of it. I still stick with my advice tho- keep putting him back and putting him back. Bring feeds forward if he's apopleptic but stick with it is what I reckon. Hope others are along to give you their advice soon too x

Poor you. You must be exhausted! I also sleep better when my son is in his Moses basket, although he does sleep in my bed sometimes too. I have rolled up 2 towels and put one at each side of the moses basket so ds feels 'contact' all the time. Also I put him in so his head is almost touching the end, also for contact. I use a hot water bottle to warm it up before he gets in (but obv remove it before he gets in) and something that smells of me in there too. This seems to work for us a lot of the time but if he is really overtired I just let him breastfeed himself to sleep, sleep on my chest for a while, then when he is in a really deep sleep I attempt to transfer him!

Keep at it. I'm in my lo's room now trying to get him back down as he has recently only taken to sleeping in our bed with a boob in his mouth! It's been going on for a couple of weeks as he had a nasty tummy bug and then a cold but I'm being firm now. He's 5.5 months old so out of the newborn stage you guys are in. Hope we all stay strong...big beds for mummies, little beds for babies!

Oh and i forgot to say, I think it is a bit little for controlled crying. I think it sounds a horrendous thing to do anyway for any age ( i am a real softie ) But each to their own! And I think 3 hourly feeds is normal at this weight.

Thank you so much. Im just relieved to know i am not alone! Do your dcs all sleep in their own room. Do you think i should try this or do you think he is too little? Also at the moment he sleeps in a grobag, i started that a couoe of nights ago as he just kept kicking his covers offand i was worried he would get cold (in the ten minutes he is in his moses basket).

Agromum. Dont worry about the size thing i grt a lot of.funny looks when i say he is 10 weeks! How big is your lo now? When did thry move into their own room?

Happysmellyfeet. I tried the towel thing but the hv saw and i thought she was going to punch me with the look of horror on her face so i thought maybe we arent supposed to do that?

Right going to make a really conserted effort today to not let him sleep on me.

Thanks again!

Funnylittlekaty, you must be exhausted if this has been going on 5months. I hope you sre having a lie in this morning!

Remember that if he was premature you need to work on his adjusted age, not his actual age, so he is really only 6 weeks old, and had a rocky start in life. He's only now at an average birth weight. Do whatever gets you the most sleep- take him Ito bed with you if that works. You've both had a tough time- be gentle with yourselves.

Hey alex, he's in cot at the foot of my bed. No idea how big he is- never get him weighed by HV/GP as dont want to over worry, as I did in the early days when he did drop a bit too much. I think he's fine now so we keep on going. How was your night?

It's alright, he's not been doing this for 5 months! Used to go down fine at 7, be woken by us for dream feed at 10.30, then go in his own bed til 5.30 ish. Then in with us til 730. It's just since he's been poorly I brought him in with us rather than debate with him about his crib but now he's better he thinks that's his bed! We've combined it with putting him in his own room overnight. Big changes afoot in our house! Still had to feed to sleep but you can't have everything! Hope you all had a good night and the click change doesn't bugger these babies about too much!

Hello. Night wasnt great. My dh did the until 1230 shift then i did until four then he did until 7. This is fine when dh doesnt have to work but during the week it osnt great. Also dh id going away for two weeks next monday so need a slightly better strategy before then! Very nervous! Have you spent nights alone with your lo?
Thanks for all your support! Really helping me!

Poor you.can you get a kip today to set yourself up for the night ahead? I have spent nights alone but only I think ever 2 in a row. My dp works long hours and is away a lot. When home he sleeps in a separate room. My mum keeps me sane and acts as surrogate partner, often sleeping in with me. So your dh is away from next Monday?- good plan to get your new strategy going. Arm yourself in the room with whatever drinks/snacks you need to keep you going through the night as you'll be awake so much. Keep comforting, soft shushing, whatever you've found works to calm him, and keep putting him back. Where/how does he sleep in the day?

Just about to put this one down for the first stretch of night sleep. Good luck everyone. Fingers crossed for some v sleepy babies on the wee small hours!

Ok i have to be doing something wrong. I can hardly settle him at all now! Am getting so tired and frustrated! Please someone give me a magic answer.